DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am the president of a social club that organizes activities for the LGBTQ community and allies. Our club is part of a regional association of similar social clubs that are not geared towards the LGBTQ community.

Several times a year, the regional association has a social event for all of the regional clubs. Generally, members of our club are warmly welcomed and enjoy participating in these events.

At the last regional event, a prominent member of a different club informed me that, although he “loved” the individual members of our club, he would not be attending any of our club functions because the Bible condemns homosexuality as a sin, and his attendance would be tantamount to condoning sinful behavior.

I’m not sure why he felt compelled to share that view with me. I certainly didn’t solicit it. At the end of the conversation, he asked if he could give me a hug goodbye to show that there were no hard feelings. Flabbergasted, and not wanting to cause a scene, I did hug him.

The next day, I received an email from him stating that he hoped he hadn’t offended me and he looked forward to seeing me at the next regional event. That event is scheduled for a few weeks from now. I have no interest in engaging with this person.

Do you have advice on how to courteously avoid having to interact with him, especially if he approaches me for a conversation?

GENTLE READER: Since this man has already forgiven himself for the unpleasant interaction and any offense it caused, Miss Manners sees no need for you to indulge his prejudices for even a minute longer.

She suggests that you develop a keen interest in every other person at the event -- or even the refreshments, if necessary -- whenever you see him approach. But be prepared to step back from any approaching hugs.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My landlady is a kind and thoughtful woman. She goes out of her way to ensure the comfort and livelihood of my roommate and me, even going so far as to bring us a big plate of turkey every year on Thanksgiving and Christmas.

However, while I am always -- always -- effusively grateful and do my best to show her the same considerations, I have never sent a thank-you note. I was simply never taught, and am saddened to think I missed out on so many wonderful opportunities to do so.

I want to start writing thank-you notes as a practice. Is there any decorous way to acknowledge my failure to do so over the past few years and to express my regret? Or would that simply be self-indulgence, detracting from my message of gratitude?

GENTLE READER: It is not too late to begin the habit -- nor is your current situation as bad as you may think. Having thanked your generous landlady in person and reciprocated where possible, writing a letter is not strictly necessary.

But far be it from Miss Manners to deter you from self-improvement, nor from what is apparently much-needed letter-writing practice. Berating oneself or laying out excuses is not, as you say, a gracious way to start a letter of thanks. Rather, you should address the accumulated kindness your landlady has shown.

For your efforts, next year you may find yourself rewarded with some mashed potatoes to go with those plates of turkey.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: When sharing stories, anecdotes or facts in conversation, I usually cite my source. For example, I might say, “I recently read an op-ed in (newspaper) by (author) where they said ...”

But in my attempt to give credit where credit is due, I feel that I’m coming off as elitist and/or condescending. What is your opinion on when it is appropriate to cite a source in conversation?

GENTLE READER: In the current climate, “I read it somewhere ...” tends to be code for, “Someone made up something with which I agree, so it must be true.”

Miss Manners commends you, therefore, on your ability to cite and recall a reputable source. While stating it explicitly may come off sounding a bit academic in casual conversation, she will gladly let it pass instead of the alternative.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am 70 years old, and have had a cordial, if not close, relationship with my 58-year-old brother all our lives. Recently he texted me a screenshot of a map of my neighborhood. I texted back, “Huh?”

He answered, “I’m across the street from your building.”

I replied, “I didn’t know you were in town.”

He answered, “I’m here for Caroline’s wedding” (his daughter).

I was a bit taken aback, as I knew nothing about it, nor had I been invited. But I figured it was a small, immediate-family-only affair, and decided the nice thing to do would be to send a gift. So I went online to see if she had a bridal registry.

Well, it turned out that she had a wedding website, which described the lavish affair in detail: a bridal party of 24 maids of honor and groomsmen, to be held at an upscale hotel a few blocks from my home.

I was stunned. I texted my brother, “If you’re in town and can’t or don’t want to see me, that’s OK. And if you can’t or don’t want to invite me to your daughter’s wedding, that’s OK too. We’re not especially close, and my expectations are minimal. But why not be discreet about it and say nothing? Why bring it to my attention by text? It’s thoughtless at best, cruel at worst. Nonetheless, I hope the wedding is joyous, the bride radiant and her father proud.”

Within minutes, he texted back, “You’re right. We’re not close, and it’s thoughtless of you to dump your hurt feelings on me just before I’m supposed to give my daughter away in matrimony. Tasteless, too.”

We have not communicated since.

There’s a lot to unpack here, but my question is simple: How, if at all, should I have replied to the rather clumsily delivered news that I was not invited?

GENTLE READER: There is indeed a lot to unpack here. Miss Manners’ preference would have been to leave all that dirty laundry zipped up and put away -- since that is where you ended up anyway.

“Please give Caroline my best wishes” would have sufficed -- its brevity chilly enough to match the circumstances, but the sentiment faultlessly gracious. And it would suffice now.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I volunteer for an organization that provides services for homeless people. We provide items such as clothes, winter coats, shoes, infant formula, diapers and personal hygiene kits -- and also help with transportation (such as bus passes) and assistance with getting an apartment. Once someone is housed, we provide “startup kits” with kitchen items, bed linens, towels, etc., plus a grocery delivery service. All this is free.

We also have a “free wall” that has odds and ends we have received as donations. This wall often includes various gift cards. Once, I was putting some cards out when another volunteer approached me, asking if she could take a card for herself because it was so pretty.

I was so surprised that I didn’t really know what to say, so I said I guessed she could. She then used it to help herself to free items.

This woman spent 12 days in France with her husband and two sons. They’ve traveled out of the country several other times last year, so I know she’s comfortable financially.

Now, she follows me to the free area each week, saying, “What goodies do you have today?” So far, she’s expressed her disappointment in the offerings, but I fear she will eventually ask again.

Can you suggest something I can say to discourage her from taking things meant to help our homeless community?

GENTLE READER: You cannot decently accuse this person of stealing from the homeless -- which, Miss Manners realizes, is likely what she is counting on.

But you could suggest there was a miscommunication: “I am so sorry, I should have been more clear when you asked for that card. These items are meant for the indigent. They are not for us.”

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am finding that whenever I go out to a social event, or even a restaurant, I am either being captured by a camera or someone has taken candid pictures without my knowledge.

In the past, I had always assumed that picture-taking was a matter of consent and good manners. I like pictures, but feel I need to be ready for them.

Again, just this weekend, a friend sent me a couple of shots she took while I was talking to mutual friends at a party. I hadn't known they were being taken. I didn’t want to seem difficult, so I said "thanks" and didn’t comment further, but I would have preferred to have been asked.

It would take too long to list the venues at which this seems to happen these days. I wonder if we need to enter spaces with consent forms in hand.

GENTLE READER: A slightly more practical approach is to make it hard on the photographer.

Miss Manners’ logic is simple enough for someone devoted to social media to follow: It is impolite to take a photograph without asking permission. Your friend is not a rude person; therefore, if their camera appears to be pointing your way, that must be a mistake. As such, if you turn away, or if your hand covers your face, you are not intentionally ruining their shot.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)