DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband is a very sweet, good-natured guy. But lately, he keeps upsetting me with a particular annoying (and in my view, very inconsiderate) habit. He loves taking photos of me, including candid photos when I don't realize he is taking them.
I accept it is part of who he is, and I try to be patient about it. The really upsetting part is that he sometimes sends these photos out without my consent, even if I find them embarrassing. For example, he sends them to his family on a group chat that includes nine relatives. Today, he even sent an embarrassing photo to one of my friends/co-workers. I never find out until after these pictures are sent.
I have repeatedly tried to explain that this upsets me and is an invasion of my privacy. I also explained that some moments are intimate and should be left between us. But he doesn't get it and laughs it off. He claims all the photos are "cute" or "beautiful" and that I shouldn't mind.
The last two times that I found out he sent photos, I felt rage. What do I do?
GENTLE READER: He is not all that sweet and good-natured if his idea of fun is to hound, upset and embarrass his wife. This is not "part of who he is," as you assert; it is something he chooses to do.
And whoever put cameras within easy reach of all by putting them into telephones has a lot to answer for. Only an exhibitionist would want to live in constant public view, although there do seem to be a lot of those around.
But your problem is bigger than that. Miss Manners suggests that you stop arguing about the photographs and instead find out why your husband thinks it is all right to annoy and upset you.