DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a single father. I am not divorced; I am not co-parenting. It is just me and my son.

Many people I meet cannot seem to grasp the concept, and I am constantly asked invasive questions. Many of them are about my former wife or girlfriend (no such person exists). I am sometimes asked about my son's origins -- traditional birth, adoption, surrogacy, etc. A surprising number of times, I am asked the highly specific question, "How often do you get him? Every other weekend?"

When people encounter a single mother, no one ever asks, "I see you have four children. How many different fathers?" or "Do the fathers pay child support or are they deadbeats?" It's ludicrous.

GENTLE READER: Don't be so sure that single mothers are spared this intrusiveness. Or any parents, for that matter. Or just about anyone else, as we have a pandemic of rudely expressed nosiness.

So Miss Manners believes it is useful to have a response that means, but does not say, "None of your business."

In this case, start with a firm "It's just him and me," which can be quietly repeated as necessary. And the answer to where you got him can be "The stork brought him," or "From the cabbage patch," or "Surely you know where babies come from."

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was raised in a world of social graces where you did not ask point-blank questions, except among family or very close friends. This has changed, which mostly doesn't bother me; people are curious by nature.

The particular question that ruffles me is, "Why are you so dressed up?"

When I am asked this, I am not "dressed up." I do my hair, do my makeup and wear business casual attire throughout the week.

Currently I am taking business classes, and I also drive a school bus for our district. I am on a high school route, and I feel image is very important. (I feel most of the other drivers dress fairly "slobby" and set a bad example. I hold my tongue on this opinion, though.) Also, I live in a southern climate, so dresses just make sense, but this has led to embarrassing moments of being asked if I wear dresses and skirts for religious purposes.

These are grown adults asking me this, not my students. I can't get over how rude this is. Is there a way to handle this situation other than to roll my eyes and become sarcastic? Is a polished professional that rare these days?

GENTLE READER: Yes, a polished look is now rare, which is all the more reason to expose high school students to it. And to teach it to grown-ups, whose motive with these questions can only be to lower your standards to meet theirs.

"No," Miss Manners suggests you explain, "these are everyday clothes. I don't wear my gym clothes to work."

DEAR MISS MANNERS: When you invite someone to lunch, on you, isn't it rude if they ask to bring someone else? It puts you in an awkward position, doesn't it?

GENTLE READER: Not if you respond, "Not this time -- I was looking forward to a lunch with just the two of us."

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I had a dinner party for eight people. Six of them, including my spouse and me, later tested positive for COVID.

Prior to the party, we all tested negative, but obviously one or more of us was not symptomatic at the time. Five days after the party, the first person reported that he tested positive, and I contacted the rest of the guests and let them know. Over the next week, most have confirmed that they have the virus.

I feel certain that the party was the event that precipitated this, and feel terrible that my guests are ill because of it. What is the right thing to do now?

GENTLE READER: Oh, dear. Not your fault, of course, but it was your party.

You have already done the right thing in notifying people immediately, and, Miss Manners trusts, telling them how terrible you feel. This is a rare occasion where the non-apology so often used illegitimately by guilty people -- a variation of "I'm sorry you feel that way" -- is legitimate. You do feel bad that they feel sick.

There are two more things for you to do -- or, rather, one to do and one not to do:

You should check up on your guests occasionally to see how they are doing, and you should refrain from any speculation about who was the carrier. Everybody tested and everybody attended in good faith, so no good can come of targeting anyone.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I asked my fiance, via text, to please call me before he left a party. His response was, "Why?"

I found this extremely rude, inconsiderate and disrespectful. He disagrees, and says it is a way of saying, "What do you want?" which I still find offensive.

This has now become a highly debated and contentious subject. Am I wrong to believe he should have instead said "OK" or "What's up?"

GENTLE READER: Let's settle this before you are married. Otherwise, there will be bad times ahead.

It is no more clear to Miss Manners than it was to your fiance why you wanted him to call at that particular moment. So his question does not seem unreasonable to her, although perhaps it could have been interpreted with a challenging tone.

But that would be looking for trouble. Which is what you seem to be doing.

You denounced his response as if he had told you to go to the devil (or worse, but that's as far as Miss Manners will go) and then refused to accept his benign explanation.

One question for you: Why?

DEAR MISS MANNERS: There was a time when it was considered bad manners to bring a gift to a wedding. Rather, gifts were to be delivered prior to, or even after, the wedding day. It was particularly gauche to bring one to a black-tie affair. When I was a kid, there were no gift tables at receptions. It simply wasn't done.

GENTLE READER: Nor should it be, ever, although what the dress code has to do with it puzzles Miss Manners.

People having a wedding are too preoccupied to accept presents in the usual gracious manner. Those gift tables are notorious for losing cards and, in semi-public places, even losing packages.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: How can I politely send regrets to an invitation to a coin shower without feeling obligated to send a contribution? (I plan to give a cash wedding gift, as the couple requested.)

The shower invitation provides a phone number and an address in another state. I don't know the hosts. Is it gauche to reply by text?

GENTLE READER: "Coin shower"? And this, Miss Manners is to understand, is only the warm-up to the "cash tsunami" that is the wedding? How charming.

But you only asked about how to send your reply. A text is probably fine, given the casual circumstances. But a handwritten response is always better -- if only to show that the guests are less gauche than their money-grubbing hosts.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband is very handy, and works for himself flipping houses and doing construction. Every time we get close to new people, they seem to expect him to fix their home needs: leaking plumbing, doors that stick, any home maintenance that they don't know how to handle.

What is a polite way to say no? We feel especially uncomfortable when we know someone is not in a good place financially. He always ends up saying yes, resentfully, and now he doesn't want to make any new friends at all because they all seem to want to use him as their personal handyman.

He has no interest in doing their work in any manner -- not for free or for money. He has enough on his plate!

GENTLE READER: And that right there is the polite way to say no: "I am very sorry, but Scott is just so busy right now, he doesn't have any extra time -- even to help out a friend. I'm sure that you, as an overworked and exhausted (insert asker's occupation) understand how precious any time away from work is."

Miss Manners' hope is that no matter the profession of your brazen new friend, they will easily be able to relate to the objection of providing free labor.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: We had a friend visit us from out of town. She told us she would like to take us out to dinner one evening and asked us to choose a restaurant. We chose a very moderately priced place that we knew and liked.

When the meal was over and our friend was given the bill, she exclaimed at the total, making comments about how pricey it was, how restaurants charge so much, etc.

I was mortified. When I regained my power of speech, I stammered that I was so sorry and offered to pay for our meals. She refused, but kept going on and on about the cost, like it was a joke we all shared.

I finally got up and left the table on the pretense of showing our toddler a parade that was passing by. How could I have handled this more gracefully?

GENTLE READER: If your friend was not prepared to pay for even a moderately priced restaurant, she should not have proposed that you choose it. Still, Miss Manners suggests that next time, you give your friend a few options and have her choose one herself. That, or stick to restaurants that are on the local parade route.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)