DEAR MISS MANNERS: Often, when I’m with acquaintances who have no medical expertise, I find that one person will offer health advice to another with a complaint or recent diagnosis. This advice is inappropriate at best, potentially harmful at worst. For example, “You should take three ibuprofen every four hours; that’s what the doctor told my husband for his knee” -- the husband in question being a 250-pound man, while the advice is for a 110-pound woman with not-yet-diagnosed shoulder pain.

I don’t want to be rude and counter the person’s advice, nor do I want to seem to be privately advising the recipient to ignore the advice. What’s an appropriate comeback for inappropriate medical advice?

GENTLE READER: You do not mention your profession, but, given your objection to acquaintances practicing medicine without a license, it seems reasonable to Miss Manners to infer that you have relevant professional expertise.

If that is the case, then you will also want to avoid saying anything that puts you to work (“OK, then what is your diagnosis?”).

If you are not a doctor, you will have to be even more circumspect if you wish to avoid being accused of hypocrisy. In all cases, the correct response is, ”You might want to talk to your doctor about that.”

DEAR MISS MANNERS: How available does one need to be to everyone else, given that cellphones are with us almost constantly?

I’m the type of person who isn’t attached to my phone all the time; I keep the volume on low, and check it with some frequency throughout the day. My husband is seldom without his cellphone. He even has a watch that is connected to it, so he can get updates in real time on the off chance he isn’t actively looking at his phone.

I know this is becoming the norm, and part of me resents the constant connectedness of this new age. Once, when my husband couldn’t reach me for 15 minutes, I received three texts and two phone calls. When I did call him back at the end of that 15 minutes (I had been changing over the laundry and was out of hearing range from my phone), I got a tongue-lashing.

He says I need to be connected to it all the time, especially once we have children. I think he is being impatient and that he needs to take a chill pill.

GENTLE READER: There are times when your employer, friends or family can reasonably expect you to respond immediately. These include when your daughter is about to give birth, or when your patients (were you a doctor) are in need of immediate medical attention.

Employers term this being “on call,” a phrase Miss Manners finds particularly useful in its implication that the rest of the time, you are free to do your laundry or read a book. Expecting people to be perpetually on call is neither polite nor sensible.

In your own situation, Miss Manners believes that the arrival of said children will give your husband some perspective on what it feels like to have someone constantly tugging at his sleeve, demanding his attention.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband has long phone conversations with his kids, cousins and siblings -- every day. They used to be regular phone calls, then he switched to speakerphone, now it’s virtual conferences during the coronavirus crisis.

I was never a part of these calls previously, but now he feels I should be chiming in, at least for a little while. I’m an introvert, not very close to his family and uncomfortable with this new normal, even with my friends and family.

Am I being rude? Should I reach out and let them know how I feel about this?

GENTLE READER: Telling them that you don’t enjoy talking with them? Yes, that would be rude at any time. During a crisis, when families feel the need to be especially close, it would be cruel.

Could you imagine saying such a thing if they were visiting in person?

Miss Manners is not condemning you to lengthy virtual gatherings. Just pop by the monitor, ask how everyone is, and assume a look of regret when you say, “I’m afraid I have to excuse myself” -- no explanation necessary or advisable.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: We moved to a new house right before shelter-in-place became the new normal. A neighbor and his family stopped by to introduce themselves and very graciously gave us a lawnmower (they had bought a new one and had no need for it).

Typically, I would send a thank-you note and bring over baked goods, but I am unsure how to navigate this, given the pandemic. Is just a thank-you note sufficient? Perhaps I could include a gift card to a local restaurant, as many around us are still ordering takeout?

Help! My indecision now has me at two weeks out, and I don’t want to delay further and miss my “thank you” window.

GENTLE READER: First, allow Miss Manners to remind you that such a window is never closed. As you know, letters of thanks should be written immediately upon receipt of a present or favor, but the need to do so never goes away.

(Sorry. She does not mean to scold you, who realizes your obligation, but she is tired of hearing from delinquent graduates and bridal couples who declare it “too late.” The later it is done, the more groveling it requires.)

In your case, it was a neighborly gesture, for which a reciprocal neighborly gesture -- those baked goods -- would have been better than sending a bought present. Perhaps you could leave them at their door, and telephone that you have done so. But this is no time to discourage helping them order their own food, if you are so inclined.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: If I call in a grocery order and drive to the store to pick it up, should I tip the person who brings it to my car? He or she is probably not the person who filled the order.

GENTLE READER: No, but he or she is taking a risk to help get the order to you. If you want to add another tip, asking that person to take it to whoever did fill the order, Miss Manners would consider it gracious.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: The COVID-19 pandemic has brought our 34-year-old son back under our roof -- temporarily, we all fervently hope. For now, we are back to family dinnertime, like we used to have years ago.

In some ways, that is a silver lining. I do enjoy his company, and he gives us some support.

However, his table manners seem to have lost something over time. He wolfs his food in huge bites, sometimes so big they’re falling out of his mouth, and he seems to be practically swallowing his food whole, gulping noisily.

When he’s dined with us as a guest, I didn’t notice this so much, but now it is every night. So far as I know, he’s never been fed skimpy portions -- I always make sure there’s more than enough to go around -- and no one is threatening to grab food off his plate if he doesn’t eat fast enough.

He typically just sits with an empty plate while others finish, and he seldom goes for seconds. I tend to think it’s just a bad habit from living by himself, but I don’t know.

It’s well past time for me to be correcting his eating habits, but this is bothering me at mealtime and affecting my own appetite. It seems like a poor compliment to my cooking for him to gobble indiscriminately, as if it were dog food. What’s more, he will (I trust) resume his professional career when things get better, and he risks making a very poor impression when colleagues or prospective employers invite him to lunch.

I don’t know how to speak to him about this without making him feel like a reprimanded child. It’s hard enough not falling back into a mom role with this grown man who’s now back in his old room. I don’t want to introduce resentment or strife. But I’m starting to dread mealtimes with his unexpectedly savage behavior. I didn’t bring him up that way. What do you suggest?

GENTLE READER: Welcome back to Family Dinner. If you recall, those were the occasions on which you taught not only table manners, but conversation, nutrition, pretending interest in how others spent the day, and other such basic skills of civilization.

Time for a refresher course.

Miss Manners understands that the remedial approach should be somewhat different. Perhaps not, “because I’m your mother, and I say so,” or even, “You don’t want to make a bad impression on others” -- because your son has, presumably, been getting along for some time (either without business lunches, or among other gobblers). Although maybe that’s why he is living by himself.

But health arguments, which have no effect on children, work with grownups. If you are not afraid that he will choke on those huge, unchewed bites, you should be. Please insist that he slow down so that you are not in terror of having to perform a Heimlich maneuver.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)