DEAR MISS MANNERS: One of my sisters, who is big into the ancestry research stuff, gave all of her immediate family members DNA test kits for Christmas. She convinced herself that we were interested in her personal hobby.
I told her that I think skydiving is great (not a good example), and that I would congratulate anyone who wanted to do it. However, I would never want to jump out of a plane.
She was hurt that I wasn’t thrilled. I told her that the present was for her -- and because I love her, I will take the test with the understanding that this is her present, not mine.
I think it’s a rude gift to receive for Christmas. There are a lot of jokes and implications that could be made about it. What are your thoughts?
GENTLE READER: Presents that are more about the giver than the receiver are thoughtless; ones that criticize the receiver are rude. There is a difference.
Miss Manners understands that the former has occurred, but sees no evidence to suggest that your sister meant to question your legitimacy or your mother’s honor. You should therefore have accepted the gift with good grace.
You need not, however, actually take the test. If asked, you might say either that you have not gotten around to it, not mentioning that you never will, or admit that you are not as interested in ancestry as she.