DEAR MISS MANNERS: I often attend political events where I am seated in a banquet-type room (and sometimes auditoriums), with tables very near one another. There are times that speeches are given, and multiple times people rise to their feet in applause. At times, it is excessive.

As a lady wearing a skirt and heels, it is often difficult to push my chair out without hitting someone nearby, or to teeter into a standing position while applauding multiple times in an evening. I feel by the time I have risen from my chair, it is time to sit again.

Is it proper for a lady to keep her seat and still applaud a speaker? At a rally, people were jumping to their feet multiple times, and although I was in agreement, I found it very difficult to rise multiple times and remain ladylike. I don't want to appear in opposition to the speaker, yet it's not always convenient nor easy to rise to my feet as everyone else does. This crowd is cognizant of manners, as I have witnessed the gentlemen rising as a lady leaves the table (which I love to see!).

GENTLE READER: Just because someone -- or everyone else -- stands up to clap, you are not obliged to do so. It just feels that way.

The trick is to applaud enthusiastically, so that it cannot be interpreted as disapproval of the person being honored. If you felt that way, you presumably wouldn't be there.

But under other conditions, it is possible to issue polite dissent during a standing ovation. Of course people who would have discomfort getting up need not rise. But there are also those of us who believe that automatic jumping up has cheapened the value of the ultimate audience sign of approval. Miss Manners has remained seated while clapping for opera performances that are very good but not extraordinary, which is what she believes should be the criterion for a standing ovation.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: It has been on social media of late regarding a couple who brought their children to a no-children wedding. The bride went up to them at the reception to express her dismay, and the offending couple argued with her. The bride then asked them to leave. They did.

My thinking is that the bride (while entitled to be upset) was wrong in the way this was handled. What say you?

GENTLE READER: What said the bridegroom? Did he realize that he had joined his life to someone who grew so incensed at the violation of her instructions that she publicly insulted her guests, and in front of their children, as well as the bridal couple's relatives and friends?

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I'm out to dinner with my fiance and his mother, and we sit in a booth. Where should my fiance sit? Next to me or his mother?

GENTLE READER: Please don't start that.

A booth is a fairly informal seating area, for which Miss Manners does not bother to make charts of precedence. But a gentleman would tend first to the comfort of his mother, who is older than his fiancee or wife, and whom he presumably sees less often. If you set up a petty rivalry with her over his attentions, you will not have a pleasant marriage.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband sits at the table for dinner with his arm on the table and his head in his hand, which annoys me. If I say anything, he gets angry. Help!

GENTLE READER: Teach him Italian. That or similarly lively conversation will force him to be animated and -- Miss Manners hopes -- improve his posture, attitude and overall demeanor. At the very least, it will presumably be less annoying for both of you than sullenness and nagging.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I find it inconvenient not to have a napkin during a meal. Is it unreasonable to expect a host to have them available at the table? May a guest ask for them if they are not on the table?

GENTLE READER: Yes. But Miss Manners finds the phrasing, "I seem to be missing a napkin. May I trouble you for one?" infinitely preferable to "Am I supposed to wipe my hands on your upholstery?"

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have an unusual name that is mispronounced quite often. I'm always wondering if I should correct the person right away or just go along with it.

GENTLE READER: That depends upon how long you intend the relationship to last. Miss Manners feels certain that prospective employers and paramours are far more likely to result -- and less likely to abruptly stall from embarrassment later -- by knowing the correct pronunciation of your name.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I'm the matron of honor of my sister's wedding. I live in Asia, and my husband isn't able to travel with me for the wedding because of both schedule and money considerations. I still received a plus-one, so I asked a female friend to be my date to the wedding to have someone to sit with at the reception because all of the bridesmaids will have their partners with them.

My sister just told me it's fine to bring her, but she doesn't want my friend to sit with me at the wedding party table because it's weird that she's just a friend and not a romantic partner. My main motivation for inviting her was not being an 11th wheel at the wedding party table.

I don't know how the relationship between my plus-one and myself would affect anyone else or why it would be a problem. Or why I even got a plus-one if bringing a friend would be a problem. It has been known all along that my husband would not be joining me.

Generally I resort to whatever she wants because she's the bride. But being a bridesmaid is super expensive, as is a flight home (especially since I don't earn money in USD), and so it seems that letting me sit with my plus-one would be the reasonable thing to do.

I haven't raised this issue yet because she's stressed enough as it is from planning a wedding. What are your thoughts? Am I in the right, or would saying something make me a bridesmaidzilla?

GENTLE READER: An 11th wheel? At your own sister's wedding, where she has especially chosen to honor you?

You seem to imagine a table of nuzzling couples. But it is the groomsmen, not the bridesmaids' partners, who should be seated at the bridal party table.

Wedding dinners are generally organized by family groups because the occasion often constitutes a reunion. Guests who come together in pairs -- in whatever relationship that entails -- are not seated together as a general rule. This is not done as punishment, but so that they may mingle with other guests. So the proper thing to do would be to seat your friend at a different table.

But this seems to be a rare trip home for you -- must you bring your own conversation partner? Don't you want to see your relatives and meet your sister's and new brother-in-law's friends?

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Something unexpected happened when my hair started to turn gray in my late 50s. Bank tellers, waiters, shop clerks and others started calling me "dear," "honey," "sweetheart" and other names I feel should only be used for children or loved ones, not strangers who are doing business with them. I don't think they mean to be disrespectful, but I don't know how to respond other than to ignore it.

GENTLE READER: A puzzled stare followed by a sweet smile and, if quizzed, "Oh! I was waiting for someone named Honey to answer. My name is Mrs. Stitch. What did you want to ask me?"

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)