DEAR MISS MANNERS: My brother-in-law and his family have far-right political leanings that are not in line with many of our friends and my family, including my husband. On all occasions, even at a recent memorial, my brother-in-law dresses in jeans, camouflage gear and an NRA “gun rights” baseball cap.
I am hostessing a wedding for my son and future daughter-in-law at our home. How do I tell this person that this attire is not welcome at the wedding?
It does not appear my sister-in-law understands how to guide him in this area, and naturally he does not read the wedding invitation instructions, nor care to. Any guidance is appreciated to navigate this issue without creating family drama!
GENTLE READER: Clearly, that is not a concern for your in-laws, who seem to be actively courting it.
“I do hope, for the sake of our happy couple, that we can put aside any political statements” is what you need to say. If they disregard you and come dressed for combat anyway, Miss Manners recommends that you ignore them and greet them as you would any other (properly attired) guest. This will likely annoy them much more than the chance to argue their politics.