DEAR MISS MANNERS: More and more frequently, one is at a social gathering or at work and someone approaches with their latest DNA results on their phone. They then proceed to give you all the details of what percent they or their relatives are, in various ethnic categories, as revealed to them by an online company.

Given the ethnicity of the person I am talking to, I am usually not all that amazed at their results, due to knowing something about past European/Asian/African history and the shifting of populations through the ages for multiple reasons.

How can one politely inform these new recipients of DNA information that their findings are not all that amazing? I try to shift topics, but they seem intent on sharing their DNA backgrounds. Am I compelled by social etiquette to respond to their statement that they are less than .1 percent of a certain ethnicity, or whatever?

GENTLE READER: Yes, but fortunately not for long. You are obliged to say “How interesting!” before turning the conversation to something relevant, but still of general interest. And in this case, the subject could be human migration patterns.

Time was, when people were eager to bore others with details of their personal lives, they had to lure them home and feed them before showing movies of vacations or grandchildren. Now everyone can whip out a cellphone full of personal material. And you have identified a whole new topic. It was always possible to speak of one’s ancestors -- once considered a classical sign of a bore -- but then it rarely meant going back many centuries.

Anyway, Miss Manners reminds you of the all-purpose defense against being handed someone else’s device: Refuse it with the regretful statement, “No, no -- I’m so clumsy, I may drop it.”

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am not in the best financial position, making hourly wages and being 63 years old. My daughter invited me to Mother’s Day lunch, and my son invited me for Mother’s Day dinner. Am I supposed to bring presents to both my daughter and my daughter-in-law???

GENTLE READER: Surely it is only that they wish to honor you.

Well, maybe. The sweet concept of honoring one’s mother keeps spreading. Many husbands have adopted the habit of honoring their wives as mothers of their children, which seems not unreasonable as they have to help young children do this anyway.

But some mothers expect a bizarre U-turn, in which their mothers and mothers-in-law should honor them. And eventually, the concept became so diffused as to be applied to nearly everyone who is, or could be, a mother. Any female will do; those who are childless or bereaved complain of strangers presuming their maternal happiness.

Leaving aside the disdain that Miss Manners’ own dear mother had for Mother’s Day (on the grounds that there existed no day on which mothers should NOT be honored), things have gone too far.

You need only enjoy the arrangements that your children have made in your honor. No presents are necessary. But it would be gracious of you to take the opportunity to say some admiring words about the mothers of your grandchildren.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: When my wife and I visited our son and his girlfriend for a weekend, we stayed with them in their two-bedroom apartment and had a good time. During the weekend, we enjoyed two dinners and one nice breakfast at smart, trendy restaurants, paid for by myself.

After the last dinner was over, my son’s girlfriend said, “Let’s get ice cream. It’s on me.” We all said “Sure,” and headed off.

After standing in line and deciding what to get, I was last to order. As I looked around, my son’s girlfriend was busy in conversation several feet away with the rest of our party. I did not want to get out of line and cause a disturbance, so I paid.

I did not express my displeasure to anyone till after the weekend was over. My wife says to let it go, but it leaves a bad feeling toward a very nice girl who may be my future daughter-in-law. I was wondering how I could clear up these negative feelings without tainting relationships with all involved.

GENTLE READER: If your son’s girlfriend pulls this trick repeatedly, then Miss Manners will condone your harboring negative feelings and expressing them discreetly and tactfully to your son. But in this case, it seems as if it was a genuine error in timing.

Your anger would be better stored up for any future transgressions when -- if she becomes your daughter-in-law and is safely within the confines of the family -- you can practice suppressing it.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My niece is getting married. I have been to four showers, and taken gifts to each. I am hosting the bridesmaid luncheon, along with two other ladies. Should I give the new couple a wedding gift, too?

GENTLE READER: It will unfortunately be expected, but Miss Manners understands your reluctance, likely emerging after shower number three.

Enough is enough. No one should be required to attend more than one bridal shower, and any presents for these should be merely tokens. Give the couple a nice, but nominal, wedding gift. And then feel free to skip their second and third baby showers that will likely come your way.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Six weeks ago, my partner and I, who are both 60 years old, eloped. In a couple weeks, we are hosting a dinner party for our immediate family, and plan on telling them that we got married.

We are worried it may become awkward, because we didn’t tell anybody, and also because the two families have not met previously. We weren’t being secretive; we just wanted to tell everyone in person and at the same time, and this dinner party is our first opportunity to do that. Can you help us with advice on the best way to break this news to them?

GENTLE READER: “This probably comes as no great surprise, but Cynthia and I have some news. We just eloped and wanted you all to be the first to know. Please have some champagne.”

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My son’s daughter’s mother (they never married) invited my family to my granddaughter’s second birthday dinner at her apartment. I do not want to attend, due to cruel and harsh words she has said to my son. My son has paid child support (more than asked) and has been an attentive father to his daughter.

I don’t wish to be in the same environment with someone who calls my son “sperm donor” in public.

GENTLE READER: That does sound unpleasant.

However, the prospect of rarely seeing your granddaughter would likely be more so. Miss Manners fears that if you turn down the invitation, that may be the result. Go to the party and be pleasant. The reward will be witnessing your granddaughter’s birthday and being a full participant in her life -- and maybe even modeling good behavior in the face of bad, for her mother.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: When paying at the store, if I have a full basket and the person behind me has only one item, I usually let them check out first. I do my shopping in my downtime, so a couple more minutes is no big deal for me, and it saves them waiting for just a can of soda or a loaf of bread. So that’s fine.

However, sometimes, after having given up my turn, another customer will arrive behind me with just one item, as well. I feel slightly bad if I don’t let them go ahead too, having done just that for the previous person in the exact same situation. At the same time, having already given up my turn once, I’m feeling less inclined to do so again.

To be clear, I’m not talking about people trying to cut in line without asking. Those I have no qualms dealing with! But having treated one person one way, it doesn’t seem right to treat the second one differently. Depending on my mood that day, I either step aside again (and sigh inwardly), or I pretend not to notice the second comer (and feel bad about it).

I know I’m totally overthinking this, but it bugs me a little whenever it happens.

GENTLE READER: Your impulse is generous, but not required. Surely, no reasonable person would expect you to continually step aside and give up your place in line for a whole afternoon. Miss Manners suggests that you take the route of pretending not to notice -- and try to stop feeling bad about it.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: We love to host at our home, and had a group of friends over a week or two after we had new flooring put in our main floor. One guest wore stiletto high heels, which is usual for her, and we didn’t think anything of it until after the party, when we discovered the heels had left pockmarks all over our new flooring.

We of course didn’t say anything to our guest, but ended up having to replace many of the boards, at not insignificant cost. Other friends have since mentioned this is not an uncommon result from this type of footwear. How can we politely avoid this in the future?

GENTLE READER: Put down the red carpet, or whatever remnants are on hand, when she comes.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)