DEAR MISS MANNERS: You have addressed the situation of invitations where money is solicited to pay for an event that people thought they were being invited to for free. I have the opposite problem.

Every year, my organization sponsors a fundraising dinner. I purchase a table and then invite people I know to attend -- not by purchasing tickets themselves, but as my guests, sitting at my sponsored table.

I have been sending out printed invitations saying, “Mr. and Mrs. (our name) request the pleasure of your company at ...” Although that wording should make it clear that they are being invited as guests, several invitees decline; I find out later that it was because they thought I wanted them to purchase tickets.

The names of the organization and the event leave no doubt but that it is a fundraiser. So how does one word the invitation to make it clear that the guest is invited as just that?

It seems rather crass and insulting to my potential guests to put something like “This is an invitation, not a solicitation to purchase a ticket” on a formal, or even informal, invitation. Should I say something like, “We request the pleasure of your company as our guests”?

GENTLE READER: The problem, Miss Manners suspects, is that charities use the same apparently hospitable wording. They request “the pleasure of your company,” and slip in a little card saying -- surprise! -- that they also expect the pleasure of your money.

Your friends are unfortunately assuming that you are up to the same little trick. So it would be better if you did not mimic the charity’s invitation. You could write “Please come as our guests” on a card with your formal names, or, less formally, say that in a brief letter.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband and I disagree about who should announce “hello” when someone comes into the house.

Should the person who comes in the door call out a greeting such as “Hello” or “I’m home”? Or should the people already in the house call out “Hello” when they hear someone?

Or, is it OK for neither to happen, and for all to wait until they actually see each other in the same room, which could be a long time if everyone is just going about their own business?

GENTLE READER: The time-honored exchange is “Honey, I’m home!” and “Is that you?”, each called out at the same moment.

So Miss Manners does not consider this a question of precedence. The object is to prevent the person who is arriving from thinking that the spouse has absconded and the house is empty, and the person remaining at home from thinking that there is a housebreaker afoot.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Is personally delivering an invitation, wedding or otherwise, socially acceptable?

GENTLE READER: It was traditionally considered preferable to avoid the post by sending a footman, as Miss Manners recalls. If you do not happen to have a footman, you may use your own feet.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I live in a southern, tropical state. Though it is delightful and calm for most of the year (hence the tourists in the winter), we have a “hurricane season” that lasts six months, during which we prepare for possible bad weather.

Last season, my family and I survived a severe hurricane that badly damaged many parts of the area. Luckily, we were only slightly affected, the biggest problem being that we were without electricity for nearly a week. We were very thankful that we were spared, but nonetheless, it was a scary and anxious time for all of us.

During the recovery period, we heard from friends and acquaintances, including those from social media, who live in other areas of the country, most of whom were supportive. However, a few lacked any concern or sympathy for what we’d been through, jokingly implying, “What do you expect for living in that part of the country?”

The remarks were as hurtful as they were insensitive. Surely, we’re not the only ones who live in areas prone to weather-related problems, as there are many parts of the country that must worry about earthquakes, tornadoes, floods, fires and the like. We are well aware of the risks of living where we do, but that does not lessen the impact of a catastrophe upon our lives when it strikes, or the hurt from others’ lack of empathy.

How do we politely respond to those who not only make fun of where we live, but use a stressful time to imply that we should be accustomed to disaster?

GENTLE READER: “We appreciate your concern. We were comparatively lucky, and are heartbroken, as you must be, at the suffering of so many others. We certainly hope that Nature will spare you the tragedies and catastrophes that so many have experienced, here and elsewhere.”

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My problem when talking with some people is that when I’m asked a question, the person asking does not give me time to answer it.

I do not stall or delay to answer; I open my mouth to speak, but before I can, the person who initially asked the question proceeds to either supply the answer by guessing several options, or just continues on the topic wondering “why such-and-such is so.” All this while I say nothing, because it is impolite to speak when another is speaking.

When she finally takes a breath, and I can say something, what is a polite way of saying, “If you would stop talking, I could fill you in on all the details”? Or would you have me do something other than respond at all?

GENTLE READER: Ah, yes, Miss Manners has met those people. And noticed that when they guess the answer to their own questions, they are always wrong.

Her solution is to remain silent, with a politely expectant smile on her face, while they stumble along. Eventually, they come to a stop, and -- here is the difficult part -- the silence, along with the smile, must be maintained.

They then realize that they have held an entire conversation with themselves, and are forced to restate the original question in order to get things going again. And this time, they tend to let you answer.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am estranged from my mother -- and as a result, my father, several siblings, aunt and grandfather. The reasons are not important. Suffice it to say that I believe the reasons are appropriate, that the estrangement has been long-term, and that it is extremely unlikely to resolve. I don’t see my mother at all.

I have just had my first child with my wonderful husband. My baby is the first grandchild on my side. People who are not aware of the estrangement (acquaintances, doctors, extended family, my husband’s family, strangers, etc.) often pleasantly ask if baby is the “first grandbaby,” if “grandma is so excited!” and other questions of the like. People expect that my mom was in the delivery room, that she will be at events related to the baby (birthday parties, baptism, etc.) and ask where she is, if she isn’t present. The questions are well-meaning, and based on the assumption that most people my age have living parents who are involved with their grandchildren.

My husband and I are usually flustered by the (perfectly normal) questions. How should we respond to these questions politely, without making anyone uncomfortable, but without being misleading? My husband suggested saying, “I don’t have parents,” but I feel like that implies my parents have passed away.

GENTLE READER: “I am afraid they could not be here” is sufficiently vague, while slightly loaded, without being misleading. Or you can mistake their inquiry about your parents for one about your husband’s -- if they are on good terms -- and answer questions only in regards to that. The trick is to be brief and vague and not to allow oneself to be pressed into further explanation. This, Miss Manners finds, can often be expressed more successfully through the tone and finality of your statements, than through the actual words.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am still recovering from a rather long visit from my sweetheart’s sister. Marjorie talks nonstop, makes plans for us without our input, and in general has a larger-than-life personality.

Though I’m pretty casual, I find myself turned off when Marjorie picks food from serving dishes with her fingers, and licks the plate clean when she’s done eating. She also walks around the house in various stages of undress in front of us.

Marjorie has led a privileged life, and yet seems quite unaware of social norms. Her family appears to accept her behaviors as normal, and in her early 70s, she is not likely to change. Any suggestions on how to politely address the more unappetizing behaviors are greatly appreciated.

GENTLE READER: When confronted with startling behavior, one can certainly react by being dramatically startled, say with a muted scream -- as long as this is followed by, “I am so sorry. We did not mean to intrude on your privacy.” Obviously, Miss Manners encourages this reaction more for the states of undress than the licking of plates, but she also does not know how easily triggered you might be.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)