DEAR MISS MANNERS: My friend and I were at a high-energy fitness class with loud music, and at times during the class we were talking. Unbeknownst to us, our voices were carrying.

The instructor never yelled at us, but in the middle of the class, a disgruntled participant turned around and screamed at us, "Hey, she's trying to teach a class up here."

At this point, we kept quiet for most of the remainder of the class. We felt bad and were going to apologize to her and the teacher at the end of class for being disruptive. However, we were unable to do so, as we were ambushed by three other class participants.

One right after the other ranted at us like we were second-graders, telling us how rude we were. I'm not exaggerating when I tell you this was loud and in front of several people, the instructor included, who all seemed to be embarrassed for their yelling and berating us for talking during a loud fitness class (which was not in any way, shape or form a class remotely like yoga or anything else restorative).

I know we were impolite to talk during the class, and I respect that they were entitled to address this with us, but honestly, is it necessary to be ambushed and yelled at in front of other people over and over?

Didn't the first person who loudly called us out for our offense do enough? Was it really necessary to have three more ladies be ... a word that rhymes with witchy? Were we wrong to be taken aback?

For the record, we politely replied, "We're sorry," and then "OK" after their repeated verbal lashings.

GENTLE READER: There is a reason that Miss Manners is not in the habit of deputizing passers-by: Too many are apt to forget their own manners when confronted with rudeness.

She appreciates that you are willing to apologize, but notes that your fellow students were correct in one thing -- your talking was rude not merely to the teacher, but also to the whole class. A quick "I'm sorry" to the room at the time would have been in order. Even if your rudeness may have prevented your classmates from getting their full exercise regimen, it does not justify them making up the difference by attacking you.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I own a beautiful and charming English bull terrier, not a dog one sees every day. Occasionally, when we are out walking, curious people ask me about the breed.

I am a member of a breed club and am happy to answer most questions admirers have about this breed. But sometimes I am asked how much I paid for him, or how much a dog like this costs. I am uncomfortable replying, "It's none of your business" or "If you must ask ..."

Am I wrong to think this is a rude question to ask? What would Miss Manners recommend as a courteous reply?

GENTLE READER: "Bobo has become such a member of the family that I have not thought about it since he joined us. I'm sure you could find resources online."

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a young artist, and one of my art classes involves drawing all day in a famous natural history museum. The etiquette surrounding how to act around artists who are focused on their work seems to be varied.

I have talked to many of my fellow students who have expressed anger at the way they have been treated while working. A common issue is photographing artists working next to their subjects, especially including their work in the picture!

Artists are not zoo animals and have the right to be asked to be photographed -- not to mention not wanting their art to live forever in a stranger's memory card. If a patron enjoys the artist's work, please ask for their card or information.

Commenting on the work is fine for some (in my case, I appreciate it), but please try to remember that the artist is focused and does not want to be distracted by someone trying to instigate a full-on discussion of their subject matter!

GENTLE READER: Much as she would like to help, Miss Manners must point out that you work in a public place, doing something that is of particular interest to people who are there precisely because they want to look at what is also your subject matter.

It would not be a good sign if they ignored you, or asked you to move so that they could get a better view of the exhibits. And you are not indifferent to the possibility of admiration that would lead to your being asked for your card.

So please suggest that your fellow students drop their anger. Rather, they should devise "Artist at Work" signs that are so charming, both visually and in their instructions about not photographing or interrupting, that admirers will wait until they take a break to beg for their cards.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Why do both the membership chair of my social group and the secretary of a semiprofessional organization I belong to, who have complete access to the membership roster, think that entitles them to keep sending me all these forwarded emails of "The cutest puppy dogs you'll ever see," or the "Nineteen architectural treasures of Hawaii," or all the other drivel they can find that they think will enrich my life?

I am so inclined to delete emails from them that I have missed some very significant information from each organization, such as meeting times, places and dates.

GENTLE READER: You must send out a mass email of your own.

The idea, Miss Manners hastens to point out, is not to retaliate; it is to gather support and soften the impact by generalizing the problem.

So not, "Having my address for the organization doesn't entitle you to waste my time with this idiocy," but: "Perhaps I am not the only member who is missing some important notices because of the mass-forwarded and other emails unrelated to our membership that land in my spam file. Could we please limit the use of the list for business matters?"

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: A few weeks ago, a friend of mine died. She had been ill a long time and her passing was expected. Her children were at the funeral, of course, along with several cousins from out of town.

About a week after the funeral I looked at the Facebook pages of these individuals, hoping to see some mention of my friend and perhaps some kind words about her.

I was surprised to see that the cousins referred to their visit to our city as "my vacation," with no reference to the funeral. They posted pictures showing themselves having a fine time clubbing, dancing and generally enjoying themselves.

My friend's children were shown with them, also enjoying themselves. I was taken aback by this. I hope my kids have the time of their lives, but not the same week as my funeral. What do you think?

GENTLE READER: This is the problem, Miss Manners finds, with posting pictures of one's social life for all to see. You can be caught doing so many unbecoming things that may (or may not) be taken out of context.

Mourning behavior comes in different forms and in different time frames. That your friend's children were not constantly somber during the week after her death is human nature. That they were caught looking that way is the nature of social media.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My pregnant wife of 2 1/2 months just had a miscarriage. Most friends and family members knew of the pregnancy.

When we announced the miscarriage, most expressed their sorrow through religious overtones. Though my wife is religious, I am not. I found it offensive that the loss of our baby gave way to people's own religious opinions on why we lost the baby. I even had one relative tell me that this happened because I didn't believe enough.

Outside a church, what should be the proper way to express one's sorrow without getting on one's own religious soapbox and assuming everybody has your same beliefs?

GENTLE READER: Unfortunately, this sort of outrageous and cruel reaction is not confined just to the religious. Miss Manners finds that the art of blaming the victim when it comes to health issues is rampant. She supposes that its equally unpleasant motive comes from its issuers wanting to feel that they are somehow exempt from the health issue at hand. Inside or outside of church, all that is needed in a situation such as yours is a simple, "I'm so sorry."

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Our son got married two years ago. He is coming home in July for a few days. I want to give them a wedding reception for our friends and family to get to know what a wonderful person his wife is, and to see their 8-month-old twin boys. What would I call this kind of gathering?

GENTLE READER? A welcome-home party. Or better yet, a party to give your son, daughter-in-law and grandchildren an opportunity to meet your friends and other relatives. Miss Manners does not care to speculate about why you thought to call this a wedding reception.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)