DEAR ABBY: I invited a friend to spend the weekend with me on my parents' boat. She insisted that she must shower twice a day, as that is her usual routine. She said she can't wake up without a shower, and needs to shower to be clean at the end of the day. I believe showering twice a day is excessive. Even showering once a day isn't necessary unless someone has been working or exposed to dirt.

I have been criticized for "judging" her hygiene habits. They say she may suffer from a germ phobia. I have known her more than 10 years, and she has worked as a professional cleaning lady. I don't think she's a germaphobe but high-maintenance and vain.

I suggested she could wash up with face cloths and wipes, and shower once a day. The lake is so clean you don't need to shower after a swim. (For anyone who doesn't understand why I'm questioning this, it's because fresh water on a boat is in limited supply.)

Should a guest be asked to comply with the host's requests, or must the host comply with the guest's unusual demands? How should this be handled? -- GO JUMP IN THE LAKE

DEAR GO JUMP: Gracious hosts will do whatever they can to ensure their guests are comfortable and provided for. Gracious guests will comply with whatever "house rules" are instituted by their hosts. In your case, this should be handled by not inviting this particular friend to any more overnights on your family boat.

DEAR ABBY: Since my husband's death eight years ago, his family has continued to include me in their family gatherings. We didn't have children together, but I have three adult sons from a previous marriage.

A year ago, I started dating someone, but broke it off after six months. Six months later, I received an invitation to a very nice wedding. I live about 45 minutes away from the venue. Nighttime driving is not an option for me, and the neighborhood is no place for a woman to maneuver alone. My invitation was for me and a guest. I was delighted that I could possibly ask one of my sons to escort me.

The mother of the groom (my sister-in-law) texted me to explain that the "guest" on my invitation was meant to be for the gentleman I stopped seeing six months prior and not my son. She had never met this gentleman, and my son is appropriate in appearance and manner.

My feelings are seriously hurt. I feel an invitation that includes "and guest" should not be at the discretion of the sister-in-law. I was also hurt that the decline of my "guest" was via text rather than a conversation. What are your thoughts? -- DISAPPOINTED IN MISSOURI

DEAR DISAPPOINTED: Oh my. I think what your sister-in-law said was rude, insensitive and ridiculous. "And guest" is a thoughtful, inclusive gesture to ensure that the invitee isn't left sitting alone at a table when couples are off dancing. I remember my late Aunt Eppie (Ann Landers) once telling me that if she received a solo wedding invitation, she would send her regrets.

DEAR ABBY: Regarding "Tall Person Sympathizer" (Feb. 28), whose very tall husband and son hate the comments they receive, I am 6 feet, 8 inches tall, so I can relate. One does feel like part of a freak show and have to deal with things most average height people don't think twice about, like, "Can I fit in that car?" or "Where can I buy clothes that fit?" And that tired basketball question. Yep, even at my age of 64 I still hear it.

But the questions don't bother me much anymore -- except for "How's the weather up there?" Now when someone asks the height question, I quickly respond with the obviously wrong answer of 5 feet 6. It always gets a laugh, and there usually is a little small talk after that, and I may even ask them their height. Then I tell them, I am 80 inches tall, which is true, and let them figure it out.

Seriously, though, most people look favorably upon you and wish they themselves were taller. I'll add, from my memory of my youth, it sure didn't hurt in attracting the ladies. -- JAMES IN DELAWARE

DEAR JAMES: I received a "tall" stack of responses about that letter -- almost all of them upbeat and fun. Several suggested the helpful retort when asked if they play (or played) basketball:

Short person: "Do you play basketball?"

Tall person: "No, do you play miniature golf?"

Most readers emphasized the positivity of accepting all of our unique differences. Read on for another gem:

DEAR ABBY: My granddaughter was 6 feet tall by the time she was a sophomore in high school. And yes, she received a lot of comments about it. She told me that when she was 15 she decided to embrace her height. And she did.

During her senior year, she auditioned for "Miss Local High School" and performed a monologue about what it was like to be a 6-foot-tall girl in high school. With jokes and good humor, she addressed the questions of playing basketball and volleyball and said she did neither. But she finished by saying that the best thing about being so tall was that she was able to help all the old, bent-over folks in the grocery store when they needed an item on the top shelf.

She didn't win the contest, but she did bring laughter to the audience. Today, she's a successful businesswoman with a boyfriend who is even taller. She has never considered her height a problem, so it isn't. -- CAROL IN FLORIDA

DEAR ABBY: I have a dilemma. A decadeslong friendship ended last year after an unfortunate, painful event. I have items he loaned me. What do I do with them, as we are no longer in contact? Should I ship them to his house? Donate them to charity? Neither seems like a good idea. I'm not angry, but I can no longer let this person be any part of my life. What is the right thing to do? -- AT A LOSS IN THE MIDWEST

DEAR AT A LOSS: The right thing to do would be to send the items to his house. They are not yours to donate; they are his property.

DEAR ABBY: I'm hoping you can help with an ongoing issue I'm having with my sister-in-law. She has verbally assaulted me four times, each time acting like she doesn't remember what she said or apologizing -- only to do it again. When these assaults happen, she's intoxicated and high (I suspect she has an addiction problem).

I have never been anything but kind to her, her husband and her children, and I never fight back. These attacks happen mostly via phone or text, after which I hang up or block her. Once, it happened in person, and I just walked away. I have done this so it doesn't cause even more problems, but I have reached my limit.

What do I do next time I see her at a mutual get-together? I already told my husband I will no longer attend events at her home. -- HATES ALL THE DRAMA

DEAR HATES: Have you or your husband approached your sister-in-law's husband about her erratic behavior and your concern about her substance abuse? I think you should. However, if you can't bring yourself to do that, treat her as you would any other rude acquaintance you would prefer to avoid. When you see her at mutual get-togethers, stay on the other side of the room and do not engage with her.

DEAR ABBY: Our son and his wife were visiting with us in our living room. While we were talking, his wife picked up her cellphone and several times initiated texts during their brief visit. My spouse and I think it was rude, but we haven't said anything to them. Should we? We would prefer that everybody be fully present during the short time we're together.

During a prior visit at our house, I asked her a question. As she was about to answer me, her cellphone buzzed. She got up, made a phone call and left the room for a while. Her call wasn't an emergency; it was just to chat. We thought that was rude, too.

What, if anything, should we say or do? She makes frequent texts and phone calls when we visit them. Are the rules different at their house? -- PERPLEXED DAD IN TEXAS

DEAR DAD: Your daughter-in-law's behavior was rude and disrespectful. In your house, you should establish the rules. Consider making one of them leaving cellphones in a basket at your front door. (In your son and DIL's home, they can make the rules.) You should have spoken up about how she made you feel the first time it happened, because the unspoken message she conveyed to you was that she wasn't interested in interacting with you.

DEAR READERS: Happy Father's Day to fathers everywhere -- birth fathers, stepfathers, adoptive and foster fathers, grandfathers, and all of you caring men who mentor children and fill the role of absent dads.

P.S. Also, a big shoutout to dual-role moms. I applaud you all -- today and every day. -- LOVE, ABBY