DEAR ABBY: My best friend, who is 54, has had Type 1 diabetes since she was 9. She takes two insulin shots a day -- one in the morning and one in the evening. We live together, and at night her blood sugar drops pretty low. I can tell when it's happening because she becomes unresponsive. Twice she has had seizures that resulted in 911 calls.

I have begged her to please try adjusting her insulin dosage so it doesn't happen again, and she says she will, but it's still happening. I don't want to act like I know more about her condition than she does because I don't. When it happens, it's really scary, and I am worried she will die. I've told her this, but she keeps doing the same thing. What can I do? -- CARING FRIEND IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR FRIEND: You are a wonderful friend, and your concerns about your best friend's health are understandable. I ran your letter by Dr. Robert Gabbay, the chief science and medical officer of the American Diabetes Association, who had a lot to say. I found it educational, and I hope you and other readers will agree:

"Abby, people who have had diabetes for many years sometimes lose their ability to tell when their blood sugars are low. There are a number of ways to deal with the situation, but the most important for her friend is to talk to her health-care provider.

"Things can be done to help her. One of them would be to equip her with a glucose monitor, which measures blood sugar continuously and warns when blood sugar is starting to get low so that she (or you, if you are there) can administer fast-acting carbohydrates.

"Another is a medication called glucagon. It is administered by injection and quickly raises someone's blood sugar when it drops and the person is unable to respond. This is something the friend or a family member can be taught to use. It is commonly used by someone other than the person with diabetes because it is supposed to be administered when the individual is unconscious.

"Finally, it is extremely important for the person with diabetes to understand why her blood sugars are dropping and what changes in insulin dosage are necessary! The key is that she speak about this with her health-care provider."

DEAR ABBY: I recently moved away from my home state and across the country. In a text to my mother, I suggested she come to visit me and stay in my place. A few days later, in a family group text, my father mentioned he is looking forward to visiting.

While I am polite to my father for my mother's sake, I do not want him visiting me or staying in my house. The invitation was strictly for her. How can I tell my mother this without upsetting them? I would really like for her to visit, but I am simply not comfortable seeing my father. -- UNCOMFORTABLE IN THE EAST

DEAR UNCOMFORTABLE: Is your mother aware of your feelings about your father? If she isn't, tell her how you feel and why. If she's aware, then she was wrong not to let him know the invitation was for her only. Pick up a phone, call her and make clear to her you do not want him to accompany her.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 61-year-old never-married woman with no kids. Most of my life was spent caring for my aging parents, working on my education (I have a master's degree) and saving for my future. I am financially stable. I own my house free and clear, own my car and have very little credit card debt. I have a good job I enjoy, a circle of friends and many activities. I took care of my parents because it was the right thing to do, and I was prepared for their deaths when their time came.

My brother (my only sibling) died unexpectedly one year to the day after my mother's passing. It was a terrible shock, and it has taken me the last two years to come to terms with his loss. My issue is with my brother's widow. We have never been close. There's no animosity, nor have there ever been any harsh words, but we never bonded.

My niece and I get along beautifully but, no matter how much I try, I can't seem to break through to my sister-in-law. She is very dismissive of my grief. She never calls and never asks about my life. She never visits or reaches out in any way. She's responsive and kind when I do, but the communications are one-sided.

I honestly wouldn't miss her if I didn't see her, but my loyalty to my brother and my desire to keep my niece out of the middle has kept me from distancing too much. Now that my parents and brother are gone, there are things I would like to pursue on my own. How much do I owe to her? -- FUTURE-THINKING IN TENNESSEE

DEAR FUTURE-THINKING: Your brother's widow may have been dealing with her own grief over the loss of her spouse and unable to handle yours. Be cordial to her, as she is to you, but go on with your life and relationships. Remember her on special occasions with a call, a card or an invitation. If you and your niece have a closer bond, those things should come naturally.

You have handled the responsibilities life handed you with grace and generosity. It is now time for you to enjoy your own life and worry less about the lives of others.

DEAR ABBY: I recently left my boyfriend. He said he loved me, but I felt like a third wheel in our relationship. He had a female friend he was constantly borrowing money from, even though we both work. He also gave her relationship advice. They would bicker back and forth like 2-year-olds, and when we went places, they made me ride in the back while they were having a conversation I was never part of. He also cut me off every time I talked. When I asked him why, he said I talked about dumb things. Was I wrong for walking away? -- BAILING IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR BAILING: Wrong? NO! The man had no respect for your feelings or for you. For all of the reasons you mentioned, you are much better off without him. I'm glad you finally summoned up enough self-esteem to end things with the two of them. To paraphrase the late Princess Diana, there were three people in your relationship.

DEAR ABBY: I live with my longtime boyfriend, "George," and his 88-year-old father, "Frank." Frank is not your average 88-year-old. He does almost everything anyone in their 60s would do. However, he's used to us having dinner for him at the same time every night because he's very regimented about everything.

Frank gets everything taken care of and never has to worry about a thing. He pretty much keeps to himself. We have a coffee machine that's easy to use, but Frank expects to have his coffee at a specific time as well. He refuses to even try to make it himself, which means we can't sleep in even if we want to (we are retired).

I hate that Frank lives with us because it has caused a lot of problems between George and me. I feel trapped. If I have a disagreement with Frank, George takes his father's side, even when he's wrong.

We cannot financially have Frank in his own place, either. I own a third of our house (no mortgage). All three of us depend on our Social Security for household expenses, and Frank pays the insurance on the cars. I just feel that as much as I do for them, I should get some backup. Please let me know your thoughts. -- FEELING USED IN FLORIDA

DEAR FEELING USED: If you haven't told George how trapped and unhappy you feel, you should. If you are the maid, cook and laundress, perhaps it's time he assumed responsibility for his father. Suggest he invest in an automatic coffeemaker that can be set for a specific time the night before Frank's morning coffee is expected. That way you can sleep in if you wish.

From your letter, it's clear to me your problems with the men in your life go beyond coffee duty. If you are truly unhappy with this arrangement (which, predictably, won't last forever), consider consulting an attorney or a financial adviser about how to access the money you have invested in that house so you can live independently.

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I had an excellent relationship that involved a lot of partying. After I was injured on the job, I became addicted to painkillers, which resulted in a 20-year battle with addiction. Over the years of trying unsuccessfully to get sober, I asked my wife to slow down her drinking to help me get sober. She refused and, ultimately, our marriage fell apart.

We decided to stay together until our kids were out of school and, wouldn't you know, no sooner did we separate than I was able to get sober. I know it wasn't her fault I was addicted. I think I'm probably better off getting divorced, but I still love her, and I'm curious if you think we should end it or give it another try. -- SOBER GUY IN MASSACHUSETTS

DEAR SOBER GUY: To drink or not to drink is a choice. If your wife was unwilling to sacrifice imbibing in order to help you overcome your addiction, you were right to separate from her. Congratulations on your sobriety. If you wish to maintain it, follow through with that divorce. You have my sympathy. I hope you find someone more supportive in years to come.