DEAR ABBY: I have a person in my life who I considered to be my best friend. Before he moved out of state, we agreed we would contact each other every two weeks to stay in touch and, for a short while, we did. However, I began to realize as time passed that I was the only one making calls, and sending texts or emails.
My wife and I planned a special vacation to visit this friend. While there, my wife shared with him that after losing both my parents within a very short time, I'm not the same. She told him I had been struggling with depression and my personality had been affected. He promised he would call more often to check on me, but he never did.
In the few times that I've spoken with him since our vacation -- again, with me doing the calling -- he has never asked me how I'm doing. My wife calls him a fair-weather friend and says he is self-centered, and I should just put him out of my life. I loved my friend more than a brother. What do you think I should do? -- FRIEND FOR LIFE IN TEXAS
DEAR FRIEND: Please accept my sympathy for the losses you have experienced. Your wife may have a point in her estimation of this friend. He certainly hasn't proven himself to be emotionally supportive or willing to do any of the heavy lifting in your relationship since he moved away.
Think carefully: Could he have always been this way, and the distance has just made it obvious? If that's the case, continue to accept him for who he is and appreciate what little he is capable of giving when you talk, text, email, etc. However, if his emotional distancing is new behavior, then for your own sake, develop a better support system to help you through this difficult period.