DEAR ABBY: My preteen son is friends with a boy I don't quite approve of, but I understand that sometimes bad decisions lead to future wisdom. When I can, I allow the friend to come to our house to hang out with my son because this friend allegedly has a difficult home life.
During this last visit, I noticed them hanging out a little physically closer than usual. They shared the same recliner to play video games, talked to each other using gamer tags and the like, and had what I assume were numerous inside jokes.
My husband and I would never belittle, degrade or denounce our children for being gay. We know we're from a bygone era, and we do not assume our particular values are held by our children. We have discussed it and know how to approach it from our perspective if our son announces his orientation. I'm not even certain my perception of his closeness with his friend is accurate.
My husband is more worldly than I am, and he says this kind of behavior is not unusual in the EU. Neither of us wants to address this ahead of anything occurring. We will love our son regardless and support him throughout our lives. I don't want to make him feel singled out by what may be usual pubescent behavior. My husband and I are in our 30s/40s. We live in an extremely rural area, and this is my son's only real friend. Any insight would be appreciated. -- WONDERING ON THE FARM
DEAR WONDERING: You may be jumping to conclusions unnecessarily. Sitting close to play video games and sharing inside jokes with a best friend are not necessarily signs of being gay. It is what best friends that age do. Whatever your boy's sexual orientation may be, you say you will love and support him regardless, so this shouldn't be a problem. His sexual orientation will reveal itself in its own time.