DEAR ABBY: I have a former high school classmate who, over the years, I've gotten pretty close to. He has been there for me when I was at my lowest, and I have been there for him as well. He lives several hours away, but we talked almost daily in addition to being on social media.
A few months ago I stopped hearing from him, and his social media profile went dark. I had a bad feeling, so I Googled him and was shocked to see he had been arrested! While it wasn't a violent crime, it was horrible just the same. He has called me several times from prison, declaring his innocence -- always requesting money. Abby, I live paycheck to paycheck. Even if I had extra money, I wouldn't feel comfortable giving it to him.
I feel hurt and used. Part of me says I need to end the friendship; the other part says he needs friends right now and it's not my place to judge him. I have refused to accept his last few calls because I really don't know what to do. Your thoughts are appreciated. -- BLINDSIDED IN PENNSYLVANIA
DEAR BLINDSIDED: This person hasn't used you -- yet. The next time he reaches out, accept the call. When you do, make clear that you can offer moral support, but you cannot give him money because you live paycheck to paycheck. You may not hear from him after that. But if he continues to ask, take a giant step backward and recognize this friendship has run its course.