DEAR ABBY: I have come to realize that the best thing a person can do for anyone is to cook something for them. I enjoy the expression on their faces when they take the first bite, and the positive compliments I receive.

I have a cookbook collection that, at present, numbers more than 3,200 items. I actually ran out of room for all of it in my home. Nevertheless, I would like to order your cookbooklets -- I guess you could say in order to "feed" my obsession. I'd love to know which of the recipes are among your favorites.-- COOKING IT UP IN VERMONT

DEAR COOKING: For years, I, too, obsessively collected cookbooks, so I relate to your addiction. Be careful what you wish for! (My late husband used to walk by the crowded shelves muttering that he couldn't understand why I didn't actually prepare the recipes, but it was the photographs that hooked me.) The recipes in my cookbooklet set of two are ones that I have used for entertaining. Among my favorites in "Favorite Recipes" are the Company Crab Dip, Lobster Bisque, Sweet Potato Casserole (Thanksgiving), Swedish Meatballs, Everybody's Favorite Meatloaf, Burgundy Lamb Shanks, Date Cake, Fruitcake (Yes, I know -- but THIS one IS good!), the Famous Pecan Pie (a blue ribbon winner) and the Chocolate Mousse. Among my favorites from "More Favorite Recipes" are the Little Mushroom "Pies," Hearty Bean Soup, Cathy Lee's Rice, Eggplant Mozzarella Casserole, Cornish Game Hens (stuffed with raisins, walnuts and apple), Chocolate Zucchini Cake (it's healthy!), Raw Apple Cake With Caramel Glaze, Heavenly Peanut Butter Pie and Regency Brownies. For anyone not experiencing sugar shock after reading this, my booklets can be ordered by sending name and address, plus check or money order for $16 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby -- Cookbooklet Set, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. Shipping and handling are included in the price. After reviewing this list, my mouth is watering, my toes are curling and I'm realizing what a miracle it is that I'm not six ax handles across, but these are dishes I prepare for guests -- not my own daily consumption. Readers have written to tell me some of them have won prizes at county fairs in years past, so I'm sure you will enjoy them, too.

DEAR ABBY: I've been in an off-and-on marriage for eight years. My husband drinks every day. Once he's reached a certain alcohol level, he curses me and talks trash about my family. He is no longer affectionate with me. Our marriage is toxic. We are living like roommates instead of husband and wife. He won't go to AA and is very disrespectful, and I'm going to leave him. What do you think? -- CAN'T DO IT ANYMORE IN GEORGIA

DEAR CAN'T: I think your husband has shown you he isn't going to change for the better. After eight years of living with his drinking problem and verbal abuse, the time has come to consult a lawyer and set yourself free. If you're looking for validation from me, you have it.

TO MY MUSLIM READERS: It is time for the breaking of the Ramadan fast. Happy Eid al-Fitr, everyone. -- ABBY

DEAR ABBY: I have been married to my second husband for more than 15 years. My 30+-year-old son from my first marriage, who was born disabled, lives with us. He walks and talks, but cannot be left unattended. He also needs medication. He cannot read or write, but looks like he has no medical issues at all.

I have no extended family members in the state. My husband and I were invited to a family wedding. However, my disabled son was not. Bride's rule: No children allowed. I pointed out that he is older than she is. He sees this relative several times a year.

Child care is hard to find and expensive. I do not know if others tried to get the bride to change her mind. My husband attended alone while my son and I spent the evening with friends and had fun. He didn't say anything to cause a confrontation.

Please share your thoughts. I get very sad whenever family events come around and she is there. Life is different when you have a family with special needs. -- HURT IN THE EAST

DEAR HURT: I agree, life is different for families in which someone has special needs. If you haven't already, I think you have the right to express your feelings to the bride. It would be better than silently nursing a grudge and fuming when you see her.

While it would have been nice if she had included your son in the invitation, she was within her rights to invite -- or exclude -- anyone if she had concerns. Because your husband was able to represent the family while you and your son had fun elsewhere, from my perspective, everything turned out well.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend never gets off his phone -- like ever! The first thing he does in the morning is wake up and grab his phone. He was off one day last week and -- I'm not exaggerating -- he didn't put it down for 13 hours.

He plays this one particular game, and it's all he does. It's affecting our relationship, but if I say anything about it, he laughs, gets mad or ignores me. I don't know what else to do. Help! -- WOMAN VS. PHONE IN OHIO

DEAR WOMAN: Was your boyfriend always like this? If the answer is no, he may have become addicted to gaming, which, as of 2020, had become a multibillion-dollar industry. According to The Addiction Center, the "average" gamer spends six hours a week glued to his or her cellphone. That your boyfriend went on a 13-hour binge is cause for alarm. One sign of addiction is when it interferes with daily life or relationships. That he blows you off when you try to discuss it tells me he is deep in denial.

There is treatment for gaming addiction, but only if the addict is willing to admit there's a problem. Treatment may involve private counseling or, in some cases, inpatient care. However, if this is unaffordable, On-Line Gamers Anonymous (olganon.org) may be a helpful alternative. It is a 12-step program based on the principles of AA. If you go online, you will find there is a fellowship of friends and family members of gaming addicts. You might want to check it out. If you intend to continue this romance, get out of the house when he binges and do something you enjoy.

DEAR ABBY: I am a widower. I lost my wonderful wife of 35 years to heart disease eight years ago. I have had no relationships with women since then.

Recently, I had the pleasure of meeting a very nice woman, "Yvonne." She's 11 years younger and has never been married. We see each other socially and enjoy each other's company. We are both retired, have our own money and neither of us is interested in marriage.

My son and daughter, both married with children, are split in their opinions about this. My son is happy for me, but my daughter thinks Yvonne is too young for me and wonders why she never married. Some of my friends actually side with my daughter.

At our ages, I don't think an 11-year difference is a big deal. Why Yvonne stayed single is none of anyone's business. Since her mother's death, my daughter has been protective of me. Am I wrong for enjoying the company of this woman after so many years alone? -- LONELY WIDOWER IN ARIZONA

DEAR WIDOWER: No, you are not wrong. If you and Yvonne enjoy each other, you are both unencumbered and entitled to it. Eleven years is not too great an age difference. Your daughter seems to be more possessive than protective. Seeing you with a woman other than her late mother -- regardless of age -- may be what's really bothering her.

If you want to allow your friends to run your life, I can't stop you. But I see no reason why you should allow them to dampen your enjoyment if all they can find wrong with Yvonne is her age. (Could any of these "friends" be jealous or closely tied to your late wife?)

DEAR ABBY: I am the youngest of three. My brother is the eldest. Our sister died of cancer 20 years ago.

It breaks my heart that he and his wife can't seem to decide whether they like me or not. Sometimes they are warm and inviting, but for most of my life they've been cold, critical and distant. They create imaginary problems, blame me for them and then keep me on the outs until they decide to forgive and forget. I've spent many hours crying about this.

I have finally reached the point where I refuse to be hurt any longer and have chosen not to engage with them anymore. It has been nearly a year since we've had contact. My husband sympathizes with me and recognizes their behavior as odd and hurtful. However, he believes I should reach out once more because my brother is my only living sibling. I'm fearful that if I do, I'll be hurt once again. Your advice is greatly needed. -- UNDECIDED IN SOUTH CAROLINA

DEAR UNDECIDED: Your husband is a kind and forgiving man who has not experienced the pain your brother and his wife have subjected you to with their mind games. Your brother may be your only living sibling, but it is an accident of birth. He is incapable of the kind of relationship you would like to have had with him. Having been hurt repeatedly, you are right to be fearful. You will shed fewer tears if you continue keeping your distance.