DEAR ABBY: I'm 54 and afraid to tell my spouse I want a divorce even though I'm in an unhappy marriage. I told him years ago that I no longer loved him and didn't want to be married anymore. His reply, "I have enough love for both of us."

This year will be our 15th together. I am spouse No. 3. I think he thinks that if there isn't another person I'm in love with that we can continue like this. I feel it's just time for me, and I'm tired of always being somebody's something. I have thought of moving out, but money is an issue, and I have nowhere to go. I hate confrontations, and he is a good man, but I am truly beginning to hate him. Any advice? -- MISERABLE IN THE EAST

DEAR MISERABLE: Just a word of caution: The grass is not always greener on the other side of that fence. However, because you feel that remaining with your husband is intolerable, begin planning your exit. Line up a job and a place you can afford in which to live. Upgrade your marketable skills, if necessary.

Remember, your husband has been through this before, so he is a veteran at divorce. Before making any more announcements, discuss this with an attorney so you can protect yourself.

DEAR ABBY: I'm at a total loss, heartbroken and need some advice. My husband and I are both over 60 and have been married for 20 years. He has this insane idea that I have a diary. Abby, I don't have a diary. I have never had one, and I don't plan on ever having one.

Short of taking a polygraph test, I can't convince him to believe me. He told me that unless I let him review my diary, he doesn't want to be with me anymore! He has completely stopped communicating with me. I hurt so bad I can hardly stand it. -- ALL CRIED OUT

DEAR ALL CRIED OUT: Your letter is a first. Is your husband losing it? Is he on medications that have altered his mental abilities? His fixation and insecurities are off the chart.

You do not have to tolerate his passive aggression. The first thing you need to do is talk with his doctor about what has been going on. Your husband may need a physical and psychological evaluation. Please don't wait.

DEAR ABBY: I would like to get some feedback on my soon-to-be-empty nest. Our last dog is approaching 18 years old, and I would like to adopt another cat or dog. My husband wants to wait at least a year with no pets in the house before possibly considering getting another animal. I grew up with pets and can't imagine what it would be like without one. What to do? -- ANIMAL LOVER IN FLORIDA

DEAR LOVER: With an open mind, discuss this further with your husband. You need to understand his reasons for feeling the way he does about this. As you already know, a fur baby is a serious responsibility, and when the quarantine ends and things return to normal, he may want the two of you to travel. Because you have had your sweet dog for so many years, slow down. Both partners should be onboard with the timing for adding a pet to the household.

DEAR ABBY: When I was in my teens, I was kicked out of the house multiple times by my parent. Mind you, I hadn't done anything wrong. To this day, I'm still trying to figure out what I did to deserve it because it happened so many times.

My parent would get mad, tell me to leave and then beg me to come back home -- all within a three-day time span. Luckily, other family members took me in when these episodes occurred.

The same thing is now happening to my younger siblings, and it pains me to see them go through what I did. I try to defend and protect them. Our parent has never been verbally or physically abusive. It is just the kicking out that throws us off.

I've mentioned counseling to my parent, but it's not an option. I love my parent, and I forgave. But I can't speak for my siblings. -- DISCARDED IN SOUTH CAROLINA

DEAR DISCARDED: If a child is a minor, what your parent has been doing is considered child abandonment. It is against the law. Although you have been able to forgive your parent for their abuse (that's what it was), your younger siblings may not be so generous. Because you are their self-appointed defender, you may have to assume responsibility for them until they become independent -- either by taking them in yourself or by arranging for other relatives to do it for longer than three days.

It goes without saying that your parent's behavior is irresponsible and erratic. If a neighbor or an administrator of your siblings' school should get wind of this, they would be required by law to report it to the authorities. Counseling is available in many communities on a sliding financial scale. Perhaps if your parent is reminded that there are penalties for what has been going on, they will seek the help they need.

DEAR ABBY: My 14-year-old son, "Jeff," received word that one of his friends was killed in a tragic ATV accident a week ago. His only experience with death before this was a sick great-grandparent we were able to say goodbye to.

Jeff and I are close, and I have let him know that however he needs to grieve is OK. He says he's "good." I am concerned that my son is taking the loss harder than he lets on.

Jeff and his friend loved team sports and were in the same group for summer workouts. Jeff has been to only one workout since his friend's death. I know this is recent and he needs time, but I also know the physical activity and the camaraderie would be good for him.

I'm trying not to smother him or project my own grief onto him (we are a tight sports community), but I'm unsure what to do. Can you offer some advice on how I can best support him? -- GRIEVING, TOO, IN OREGON

DEAR GRIEVING, TOO: When a tragedy happens to someone in a teenager's circle, the friends sometimes pull together to support each other. Contact the coach of the team to which your son and his late friend belonged. The surviving team members may need help and possibly grief counseling. If that isn't necessary, the coach may be able to offer the boys other constructive outlets for their grief or provide you with suggestions.

DEAR ABBY: My husband, "Daryl," gets furious every time I talk to my ex, my two oldest kids' father. The only thing we discuss is my kids' issues, but Daryl loses it completely. He starts calling me names and says I don't respect him even though I do. I keep assuring him that there's nothing inappropriate being talked about (he is present during all the conversations since we talk over the phone and live in different states).

I don't know what to do anymore. My kids are 14- and 13-year-old girls, who are going through all these crazy teenage issues, which obviously, as their parents, my ex and I have to sometimes talk about, and it's not even that many calls. I'm wondering if this is normal because I've only been in two relationships in my life. I'm 33, and I feel like a goofball for not knowing what to do. -- TOUGH SITUATION IN TEXAS

DEAR TOUGH SITUATION: No, it is not normal. Your husband's jealousy and insecurity are over the top. You have a responsibility as the mother of two teenage daughters to see them through this time of great transition, and if you feel their father is in a better position to provide input than your husband, you have a right to seek it.

It's time to talk about this with a licensed marriage and family therapist because Daryl's behavior is abusive. If it isn't stopped, it may escalate. Do it now because if the verbal abuse continues and your daughters witness it, they will grow up thinking it's normal behavior, and it will negatively affect their relationships with men later in life.

DEAR ABBY: I have been diagnosed with PTSD by my doctor. I thought only people who have been in military combat would receive a PTSD diagnosis.

I have had a lifetime of verbal abuse from my mother. Once she had broken my spirit with rants of "dummy," "stupid" and "I wish you had never been born," I was easy prey for my older brother. To get laughs, he never misses a chance to make fun of me in public.

On second thought, I guess I have been through combat. Abby, do you have any ideas how to make life somewhat bearable? -- CONSTANTLY HURTING

DEAR CONSTANTLY: I sure do! Ask your doctor for a referral to a psychotherapist with expertise in family dysfunction and PTSD. Then make it a practice to avoid abusive people who seek attention by ridiculing and belittling others. If you do, your life will improve immeasurably. Trust me on that.

DEAR ABBY: What do you think about people having drive-by baby showers? I was recently invited to one, only to arrive and find the front yard filled with people, cake and balloons. But I had been instructed to just drop my gift and go on.

I did expect a few people to be there with the expectant mom to greet me and receive the gift, but after traveling 25 miles only to find a full-blown party going on that I wasn't allowed to join seems very rude to me. I think if that was the plan, she should have just had a shower for these A-list guests and forgone the drive-by part. What are your thoughts on this? -- TURNED OFF IN TENNESSEE

DEAR TURNED OFF: You may not have been singled out to be slighted. Those at the party may have "crashed" the lawn from their cars. What a foolish, risky thing to subject the expectant mother to. If the revelers weren't masked, the honoree and her baby were at risk of catching COVID!