DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been married more than 40 years, but we have lived separately in a house and guesthouse on jointly owned property for the last 10. We split bills and communicate only when necessary via text.
I am somewhat afraid of him and try to distance myself from him and his friends and family. He has been involved with multiple women and men throughout our marriage, but when I have tried to end our marriage, he has pushed me to remain.
He is currently openly involved with a woman he has "dated" for many years. Several acquaintances recently informed me that the two of them are sporting matching wedding bands. I don't really care, but I don't want any further humiliation. I feel like a sword is hanging over my head. What can I do? -- ARRANGEMENT IN THE EAST
DEAR ARRANGEMENT: What you can do is contact an attorney. Tell the attorney exactly what you have told me -- that you and your husband haven't cohabited in a decade, that he and his longtime girlfriend are purporting to be married and wearing matching wedding bands, that you want a divorce, but you are afraid of his reaction. The lawyer can guide you from there. Please don't wait.