DEAR ABBY: I'm a widower who was very happily married. I have decided to re-enter the dating game. I met a very nice widow, and we connected. As I was lonely, it made a big change for the better in my life. The lady I matched up with is a wonderful, caring person, and we enjoy being together doing what dating folks do. We're thankful to have found each other.
She had met a man she enjoyed being with some years ago, but it was of short duration because he died. She told me they had a nice, but platonic relationship. My problem is how often she speaks about him. Something reminds her of him, and she wants to talk about it. I can understand that he might come up once in a while, but last month she mentioned him a dozen times. I don't think she does it to make me jealous, but I find it annoying.
I tried a few times subtly suggesting it would be better if she didn't mention him. I'm not sure she understands it could undermine our relationship. What to do? -- WORRIED WIDOWER IN NEW ENGLAND
DEAR WIDOWER: Address this with your lady friend as frankly as you have to me. If she values the relationship she has with you, she will stop "raising the dead" in conversation.