DEAR ABBY: My sister-in-law "June" is being married soon. I will be the matron of honor. My husband, "Jake," June's brother, will be a groomsman for her fiance, "Jimmy." Not only is Jake going to be a groomsman, but he's also supposed to officiate.

Jake went to the bachelor party a couple weeks ago and Jimmy showed all the guys -- including my husband -- eight (!) naked pictures a girl from work had texted him. He asked my husband if he should tell June about it before the wedding or after, and Jake said he should tell her right away.

Should my husband tell June or leave it up to Jimmy, who may or may not do it? (We don't know what his plans may be about the girl who sent the pictures.) -- LOOKING FOR THE RIGHT THING TO DO

DEAR LOOKING: Jimmy may or may not have "plans" for a fling with the woman who texted him the pictures -- or it may have already happened. (He could also be an immature braggart, which is why he shared the photos with the other "stags" at the party.) Because Jake now has concerns about Jimmy's character, he should reiterate to Jimmy that if June isn't told before she makes a lifetime commitment, he will tell her. He should also refuse to officiate at a wedding he fears may be a huge mistake.

DEAR ABBY: My husband has late stage dementia and is in a long-term care center. He had several affairs during our marriage, and if the tables were turned, I'm sure he would be involved with other women while I was receiving care. I realize I should have left him years ago. I visit him several times a month but not every day. I do it out of commitment, not love. Sometimes I feel guilty for not going more often.

I guess I'm asking you for permission to see him when I have time but not every day. I also would like to encourage people who have lost faith in their spouse to make the break before any serious illness sets in. I have no interest in finding another man, but I feel tied down with the burden of seeing him through to the end. -- HANGING IN THERE IN OHIO

DEAR HANGING IN: Have a realistic talk with that conscience of yours. Surely the two of you can reach a compromise. This is not the time to punish your husband for his infidelity.

Under the circumstances, because you don't feel your husband deserves to be visited daily, visit a couple of times a week to ensure that he is being properly looked after. And if he isn't, make it your mission to ensure the situation is remedied, as you would want someone to do for you.

DEAR ABBY: This is embarrassing. I am 30 and don't drive. I have extreme anxiety and a learning disorder that affects my visual spatial perception. I try to hide this as much as possible, but I'm worried the truth will come out. Should I disclose it to employers? New friends? Acquaintances? -- PANICKED IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR PANICKED: If there is a medical reason for your inability to perform certain tasks, your employer should be informed. However, I see no reason to reveal this to acquaintances or new friends. Fewer people drive these days, and many of them don't because of the expense involved or access to public transportation.

DEAR ABBY: I have a young, preteen grandson who is asking his parents "facts of life" questions. They are bewildered about how to give him the information. I'd be grateful if you could share details of the publication you have for this purpose and how to get it. -- GRANDMOM IN CLINTON TOWNSHIP, MICH.

DEAR GRANDMOM: Many parents find the subject of sex embarrassing, so they postpone discussing it with their children. They forget that children today mature earlier and are exposed to sexual images and references more often than those of previous generations.

When "The Talk" finally happens, it's often too late. It is important that parents begin discussing subjects like alcohol, smoking, drugs, sex and family values well before their children are tempted to experiment. My booklet "What Every Teen Should Know" was written to help parents break the ice and get the conversation going. It can be ordered by sending your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $8 (U.S. funds) to Dear Abby Teen Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. Shipping and handling are included in the price. His parents should review it before starting a discussion to deal with their son's questions that might arise.

Among the important topics included are: "How old must a girl be before she can get pregnant?" "How old must a boy be before he can father a child?" Other topics, including peer pressure, dating, STDs, drugs and alcohol, are also covered. My booklet has been used to promote discussions by educators and religious leaders and distributed by doctors' offices. The more information his parents can provide, the better prepared your grandson will be to make informed choices in the future. I hope my booklet will be a helpful tool for facilitating the many conversations his parents will have with their son.

DEAR ABBY: My son recently died in an accident. His death was unexpected and shocking, and we are all heartbroken, especially his girlfriend. I know he was having doubts about their relationship because he told me, but she doesn't know.

We have grown very close since the accident. She says things like, "'Danny' and I were meant to be." It makes me think I should tell her the truth. But I'm afraid if I do, it will affect our friendship and break her heart again. What do you think? Should she know or not? -- TREADING LIGHTLY

DEAR TREADING: Please accept my sympathy for the loss of your son. Because the tragedy is recent, I see nothing to be gained by shattering her illusion. If you feel she's isolating herself, remind her that Danny would want her to go on with her life as do you. Assure her you will always be there for her if she needs you.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been married for three years. He's 26, and I'm 28. We have a good life, and he loves my 9-year-old daughter like his own child.

My husband is originally from Turkey and comes from a good family. However, I have yet to meet my in-laws. He avoids talking about my meeting them. I have talked to his younger sister and things are well and his family knows about us. But anytime I try to talk to him about money, meeting his family or starting a family, he refuses to discuss it.

I have spoken to him calmly and rationally. We have a lot in common, but anything stressful he avoids like the plague. If we get into an argument, he shuts down and walks out of the house. Recently, we got into a fight and he threw his phone at me because I shut our bedroom door. I don't yell at him.

Every other subject we talk about -- hobbies, music, dates, etc. -- is fine, but the important ones are in the back of my mind constantly. He cooks, cleans, helps with anything I ask and is a great husband. Please give me some advice on what to do. -- CLUELESS IN IOWA

DEAR CLUELESS: That your husband refuses to discuss meeting his family, won't talk about money with you, throws his phone at you when he's angry and clams up when you try to talk about starting a family are serious red flags. Because you have established a relationship with his sister, start asking her why her brother behaves the way he does. You may have better luck getting answers from her.

Although you say you have a "good life" with this man, if nothing changes, will you feel that way in years to come as your biological clock ticks away? From where I sit, your description of the man you're living with seems more like a houseman than a husband. Counseling might help you to improve the level of communication in your marriage, IF you can get him to agree to it. Something is very wrong here.

DEAR ABBY: I recently took a friend out to dinner as a thank-you. We are both retired, and she knows my budget is limited. At lunch she ordered a very expensive glass of wine, two full meals, the most expensive dessert on the menu and coffee. I ordered my meal and a glass of water.

Of course, no one could consume that much food for lunch. She left with three bags of leftovers, and I was left with an extremely large bill and a bad taste in my mouth. Is it just me or do you agree this is bad manners? If I truly thought she needed this food to get through the week, there'd be no problem. But this person is wealthy. -- TICKED OFF IN TEXAS

DEAR TICKED OFF: Your wealthy acquaintance took advantage of you. What happened proves the truth of the adage that because people have money doesn't guarantee they have class. The next time she does you a favor and you want to repay her, buy her a nice card. And if you have a meal together, ask for separate checks.