DEAR ABBY: My father recently passed away. I wanted to be sure I was appropriately dressed for his funeral, so I shopped for the most conservative outfit I could find. When I arrived at the service, I was taken aback by what my sister-in-law was wearing. I told her I didn't think her dress was appropriate for the occasion. It was skintight and all lace. I told her what she was wearing looked like something worn at a cocktail party.

Once the words were out of my mouth I knew I shouldn't have said anything. I immediately apologized and said she looked really good in the dress, and it was flattering and rather sexy. My brother called the next day. He was furious and said that he had chosen it.

I feel like at a funeral the dress should be like what you'd wear at church or a business meeting. I may be wrong. I know I should have kept my opinion to myself and regret the comment I made. Should I just let time heal this? She and my brother are extremely upset. -- SAID NO TO THE DRESS

DEAR SAID NO: When people are grieving, they sometimes make comments they wouldn't otherwise. Apologize to both of them for your thoughtlessness and insensitivity, and hope they forgive you.

Many years ago, I attended the funeral of a friend in his early 30s who had died in a tragic accident. "John's" mother was friendly with mine, and we went to support her. John's fiancee, "Linda," was someone I also knew. When she showed up wearing an orange mini-dress, his mother was appalled. She told me she thought it was highly disrespectful. When I asked Linda later why she had chosen that particular dress, her response made me want to cry. She said she had worn it because it was John's favorite dress, and he loved seeing her in it. I learned a lesson that day: Someone's attire at a funeral is far less important than what's in the person's heart.

DEAR ABBY: I am an avid reader. Whenever I find an interesting article or story that I believe someone will enjoy, I cut out the article or copy the link and send it to that person. My issue is, I don't think they ever read what I send them.

When I bring it up during casual conversation because I think it would be nice to discuss, I find that the person hasn't read it and says, "Oh, yes, I'm going to read it," but I don't think they ever do. Is sharing pushy? Do people read anymore? Should I stop sending articles and stories? -- PASSING IT ON IN NEW YORK

DEAR PASSING: You may be overdoing it in your desire to share. If someone tells you twice that they didn't get around to reading what you sent, stop.

DEAR ABBY: Graduation is fast approaching, and the pressure is on. I am doing good in school, but work and school are draining all of my energy. How can I not be so tired? I can't stop work, and I definitely need school and college. Can you give me some advice for managing time so I won't be so tired? -- TIRED IN SOUTH CAROLINA

DEAR TIRED: Recognize that you are running a kind of marathon. Establish an ironclad schedule that allows you to get the rest you need, and don't deviate from it. I'm not saying it will be fun, but it will get you through and allow you to reach your goal without making yourself sick.

DEAR ABBY: I was married to my first husband for 13 years and was very close to his family. His parents and sister were like my own. We ended up divorcing, and it was an extremely painful situation on both sides.

His family wanted to stay in touch with me afterward because they still loved me. I felt the same, so we remained connected through Facebook and the occasional phone call. After I remarried, their phone calls became less frequent, but we still remain connected on Facebook and message each other now and then.

It has been six years since my divorce, and we are drifting even further apart now because they often post photos of my ex and his new wife, who has become their daughter in my place. It's painful because it's a reminder that our relationship is fading away. I miss them and the wonderful times we had together that we will never have again.

Sometimes I wonder if it was healthy for any of us to stay in touch since we will never see each other in person, and all our online connection does is make us sad that things aren't the way they used to be. Should I politely cut ties or continue holding on to the frayed ends of what tiny shred of closeness we still have? How can I let go of such wonderful people in my life? And yet, are they not already lost to me? -- HURTING EX-DAUGHTER-IN-LAW

DEAR HURTING: As the circumstances of life change, so can the intensity of relationships. It says a lot about the one you had with your in-laws that they have remained in contact with you all this time. However, you and your ex have remarried, and your lives have taken different paths. Because seeing posts of the new wife causes you pain, stop viewing them and concentrate your energies on the life you have now. If you do, you will be happier.

DEAR ABBY: I recently quit my job for several reasons. I was no longer satisfied with my work, and I was overwhelmed with the demands from my job and attending a graduate program at the same time. I told my boss I was feeling very stressed out working for them since starting my graduate program. She was supportive and said "the door was always open," and I was welcome to come back in the future.

Soon after quitting, I reached out to her twice for a letter of recommendation. To my dismay she never replied. I took it personally since I had worked alongside her for nearly five years. Abby, am I blowing this out of proportion, or should she have had the common courtesy to respond? Is it normal for businesses to ignore former employees when asking for a letter of recommendation for another job? -- CONFUSED IN THE WEST

DEAR CONFUSED: In some states, it can be risky for a company to provide a letter of recommendation. That is why if prospective employers ask for information, they are given only the dates the person was employed there, for fear of legal liability. This may be why your former employer was unwilling to write one for you.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are seniors who look forward to visits from our adult children. The problem is our oldest son. He visits every few months and leaves belongings behind. He uses our guest room, where he has claimed much of the closet, several dresser drawers, the guest bathroom vanity and even part of our shed. He says he needs to leave things because it's too expensive to check bags when he flies into town.

We would like our guests to have space when they come to visit, and we are also trying to downsize and declutter. We have told him this repeatedly. We even resorted to mailing him back boxes of clothing, toiletries and other excessive amounts of his things to his home, hoping he would get the message. This is making my husband upset every time our son visits, and creating stress in our marriage as well. Please, we need your help. -- SON HAS BAGGAGE IN FLORIDA

DEAR SON HAS BAGGAGE: Offer your son a couple of alternatives. The first would be to clear the counter in the guest bathroom and put his toiletries into a dopp kit kept out of sight. He should leave no more than one drawer full of his underwear, socks, etc. in the bureau and three changes of clothes in the closet. Any other items he will need can be brought in a backpack that can be stowed (at no cost) under his seat during the flight. If he can't do that, then he should follow your example -- mail his things to you, and mail them back to his home when he leaves.

DEAR ABBY: I was diagnosed with celiac disease 13 years ago and have followed a strict diet since. In the past, I didn't tell my co-workers because food wasn't part of the job. However, I am now in a small department and we travel, so I have disclosed it.

My boss constantly harasses me for not eating any of the junk food he brings in (or why I don't eat all of the food when we eat out). I decline politely, but he keeps coming at me insisting that "it's OK to eat" and says I should just eat it because it won't make me sick.

I have pulled him aside a couple of times to explain celiac disease and provided him with good articles about it, hoping that reading them would have a bigger impact than my explaining. He has made some comments about how his wife follows "fad diets," and he thinks they are all crazy. I have explained how a restricted diet is the only treatment for celiac disease, but he is unrelenting in his harassment.

I don't know what my next step should be. I love my job, but this is getting in the way. -- UNSURE IN WYOMING

DEAR UNSURE: Your boss's behavior is beyond inappropriate. What he is doing could be considered bullying. The kind of stress your boss is creating makes people sick. If the harassment doesn't stop, talk to HR about his creating a hostile work environment.