DEAR ABBY: I have been best friends with "Mickey" for about five years. We spend every day together and go out to dinner/movies/events, etc. He sleeps over at my house, and I cook for him almost every night.

When our friendship started we were intimate a couple of times but have been strictly platonic ever since. The problem is, I'm in love with him. He knows how I feel, and although he claims he doesn't love me, he continues to spend every waking moment with me and is always trying to better me. We do pretty much everything a couple would do, minus the physical contact. Everybody assumes we're a couple.

I think I should also mention that Mickey is somewhat of a sex addict. It makes me self-conscious that he's constantly thinking about sex but isn't turned on by me even when we sleep in the same bed.

I don't want to lose him. I value the bond we share and what we have together, but I'm constantly thinking about how much I love him and want to be with him. I even started working out at the gym, thinking maybe my recent weight gain was the problem.

I know he "loves" me, but he isn't attracted to me. I'm afraid if one of us starts dating someone else, our friendship will take a hit. Please give me some advice. -- GIRL IN LOVE IN CONNECTICUT

DEAR GIRL IN LOVE: As long as you have Mickey as your major preoccupation, you will not start dating anyone else. You need to stop thinking that his lack of desire for you is your fault, because it isn't. Although it will be painful to call a halt to what's going on so you can meet someone who can give you what you need, that's what you should do. The relationship you're in is masochistic. You are being used, and it's not fair to you.

DEAR ABBY: A few years back, my 60-something-year-old single sister relocated from a different state to a mile from my home. Since then, my husband has become her husband. If something breaks, leaks or needs repair, she calls us. I "get" to handle the easy stuff, and hubby does the heavy-duty stuff.

I gave her our riding lawn mower and bought a newer model for us. There was nothing wrong with the mower we gave her, but she called us, crying, that it wouldn't start. Hubby spent several hours of his one day off trying to get it running, to no avail.

He told her she needed to call a repair person. Instead, she bought a spark plug and a fuel filter and started viewing online do-it-yourself videos so she could handle it. She said she "hopes" she can fix it so "he won't have to come and try to fix it again." I'm ready to explode! I feel like we're being taken advantage of. Help! -- SICK OF SIS IN THE SOUTH

DEAR SICK: Because you feel you and your husband are being taken advantage of, the next time your sister asks for your husband's handyman services, explain that his time off is limited and "suggest" again that she call a professional. If you wish to be more helpful, because she's relatively new to the area, ask some of your friends if they know someone who is dependable and competent.

DEAR ABBY: I started a new job a month ago. It's a well-paying job at a great company. My problem is I'm an insecure introvert. Making friends has always been hard for me. At this new job, my desk is away from everyone else, and no one has ever asked me to lunch.

I'm sure if I reached out proactively and asked to tag along, I wouldn't be rejected. But the thought of having to ask semi-strangers to include me and having to make small talk during lunch makes me anxious. I'm also afraid people will label me as part of certain subgroups within the department. I don't want to be in any clique. What should I do? -- INSECURE IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR INSECURE: Not everyone makes small talk easily, so don't fault yourself for finding it awkward. Ask your co-workers what places they recommend for lunch and tag along when the opportunity arises. I don't think you need to "do" much more than slowly get to know them as you interact over work-related matters.

A positive way to get attention would be to bring some pastries and a fresh fruit salad to share one day during the morning break. It's a friendly gesture I'm sure would be appreciated.

DEAR ABBY: My brother died 10 years ago. He was only 50. He was married for 15 years to a woman I'll call Alice. A few years later, Alice became engaged but never remarried because she would've lost my brother's benefits.

Her fiance died a couple of months ago, and now she's posting repeatedly on Facebook that she has lost "the love of her life." I think it's extremely disrespectful to my brother. I understand she may feel that way, but to continue to post it is a slap in the face to our brother. I've read your column for years, and you are usually spot on with your advice, so I would appreciate your opinion. -- SAD SISTER IN THE EAST

DEAR SAD SISTER: Alice's outpouring of emotion is less a slap in the face to your deceased brother than biting the hand that has fed her all these years. She isn't thinking about how her comments are affecting you and her other former in-laws, and there's nothing to be gained by trying to shut her up now. You will be happier if you stop reading her Facebook posts, and that's what I recommend you do.

DEAR ABBY: I have a relative who has, over the years, gotten many colorful tattoos on his arms, back and chest. I make no value judgments about this, but I am curious about what in today's culture motivates people to get tattoos, and why many people can't seem to get enough of them. -- CURIOUS IN NORTH CAROLINA

DEAR CURIOUS: People get inked for a variety of reasons. Among them: because they are currently in fashion, they think they are pretty, to mark milestones in their life, someone they admire has one or more, or because their friends are doing it. And I suspect that some individuals turn their bodies into canvasses because the practice is somehow addictive.

DEAR ABBY: I am having issues with a friend who gets handed most everything he wants. I had to grow up when I was very young, pay my own way for things and take care of myself. I work three jobs to pay my rent in a house with four other people while still pursuing my passion.

This friend is unemployed. He lives in an apartment his parents pay for and goes on frequent road trips. I have reached a point where I have become seriously envious, and I'm not sure how to stop feeling frustrated that he has an easier life than I do.

I care about our friendship, but it's physically painful sometimes when he talks about these luxuries that I can't afford. Should I cut off the relationship? Is this something I should talk about with him or something I need to work on myself? -- ENVIOUS IN NEW YORK

DEAR ENVIOUS: Why not do both? Tell him how his going on and on about his "luxuries" makes you feel. If that doesn't increase his sensitivity to the disparity in your situations, you have my permission to end the relationship.

However, while you are working on yourself, please understand that your friend's parents are doing him no favors. "Children" raised without an incentive to succeed are not often successful in life. They don't have the tools you have. You are independent. He isn't. Rather than work to build success in a profession, he's taking road trips. You know the value of hard work, and with each of the jobs you work, you are gaining experience and focus.

From my perspective, if I had to say which of you is richer, it is you. Step back and you will recognize you have nothing to be jealous about, and you'll be able to change your thinking.

DEAR ABBY: I have a friend I'll call Layla. Her best friend, "Matt," raped her. She doesn't want to tell anyone, but I think she needs to. She told me Matt has done it multiple times. I love her, and I don't want it to keep happening because she's an amazing person.

Her life isn't going well, either. Her mom has stage 4 colon cancer and is in her final year. Her stepdad isn't the best person, and Layla has a disease herself. I'm really worried about her. What should I do? -- STANDING BY IN OREGON

DEAR STANDING BY: You should be worried. Encourage Layla to contact the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network (rainn.org or 800-656-4673) and tell someone there what has been happening. Offer to be with her for emotional support when she does it. Her "best friend" (!) Matt is a predator, and for the sake of her own mental health she must no longer allow herself to be victimized.

Layla will need your friendship and support while her mother spends this final year battling her disease. It's a shame that her stepfather isn't supportive, but he may be grieving in his own way and unable to.

With the amount of stress that your friend is under, it is not surprising that she's ill. Stress can weaken the immune system. If she's being treated by a doctor for her illness, her doctor should be made aware of everything that's going on. She may be more inclined to reveal it if you accompany her to an appointment.