DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend and I are talking marriage soon, and I'm already stressing over who will walk me down the aisle.

I always planned for it to be my dad, but he passed away a month ago. Mom remarried when I was young, but I have never had a close relationship with my stepdad. He mentioned years ago that he'd like to walk me down the aisle one day, but I honestly would rather he didn't. I don't want to hurt his feelings or strain our relationship, but I also don't want to feel like I am replacing Daddy, who I was very close with.

Is it taboo to walk down the aisle alone? Or must I just suck it up and walk with my stepdad for the sake of not hurting his feelings? -- MARRIAGE IN MINNEAPOLIS

DEAR MARRIAGE: Brides can (and should) walk down the aisle with the companion of their choice. When the bride's father is deceased, the escort can be her mother or a close male relative. I have also heard of brides escorted down the aisle by their canine companion, which proves that although they say a dog is man's best friend, it can also be a woman's.

You are not obligated to have anyone walk you to the altar because the person asks. If your stepfather repeats his request, tell him the truth -- that it would be too hurtful because it would feel like he was replacing your father, something no one can ever do. You should also know that these days some women feel being "given away" is an anachronistic custom, and make their way alone to join their groom at the altar.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and my mother had a good relationship before we were married. But since our wedding two years ago, he complains about her nonstop while pointing out ways that I am like her. My brothers feed into it too. They often have long conversations together detailing her "many" negative qualities.

Recently, while we were visiting my parents' home, Mom overheard my husband say very critical things about her. She got upset and kind of shut down emotionally and socially for the rest of the visit. We both apologized to her separately, but she said she was tired of being criticized and tired of him being mean to me as well.

I have a history of depression. My husband and I have tried counseling multiple times, with no progress because he feels our problems are "my responsibility." My husband is a good person, but it hurts me to see my mother upset and to have the two most important people in my life so at odds. Advice? -- TORN IN NEBRASKA

DEAR TORN: I'm glad to offer some, but first you will have to accept that "good" husbands don't act like yours does. If there are things he doesn't like about your mother, he should take them up with her directly, not behind her back the way he did. I don't blame her for feeling hurt. How else was she supposed to respond?

What your husband did was destructive, not helpful. The same is true for the way he treats you. Counseling hasn't worked because of his unwillingness to accept any responsibility for your problems as a couple. My advice is to talk to a licensed therapist on your own, which will help you to see your situation more clearly than you appear to do.

DEAR ABBY: My mother insists on telling my three youngest children that my husband is not their father. The oldest girl is the spitting image of him, and she's upset about it. Mom also calls me terrible names. She keeps saying it will add years to my life if I divorce him and makes appointments with divorce lawyers "for" me, which I am charged for. My husband and I have a limited income and can't move away because our jobs are here. How can I convince our kids my husband is their father? -- TRYING TO PROVE IT

DEAR TRYING: A way to do that would be to explain to your children that your mother has severe emotional problems and isn't in her right mind when she says those things. (From what you have written, it appears to be true.) You do not have to move away to distance yourself from this toxic, troubled woman. Stop communicating with her. Block her phone number, if you must, and do not allow her to have contact with any members of your family unless and until she regains her senses and apologizes to all of you.

DEAR ABBY: I belong to a women's golfing group. The mission of the club is to play golf and have fun. We have tournaments, prizes, and awards are given for the best scores.

The problem: Several of the ladies are "allergic" to counting their scores correctly. We have given them counting beads to help them "remember" their score. They have played with board members who asked them to count their scores out loud each time they hit the ball and to state their scores after the last putt. There have also been conversations with the golf pro about the importance of keeping accurate scores. Yet, the inaccurate counting persists and denial reigns. Members are upset because these ladies often "win" tournaments. What to do? -- PROUD OF MY HIGH HANDICAP

DEAR PROUD: You might be able to curb the cheating if you suggest club members swap scorecards and keep score for each other. However, if that doesn't do the trick, stop playing with those who cheat.

DEAR ABBY: Yesterday, I took my computer to an electronics store to be fixed. The tech who helped me had a ton of dirt under his nails. I was grossed out seeing him with those filthy nails type on my computer keys. Should I have said something to him or his supervisor? How can they allow someone with his hygiene problem to be in a position that requires contact with the public? -- GROSSED OUT IN OHIO

DEAR GROSSED OUT: A quiet word with the supervisor would have been the way to handle it. And while you were at the store, you could have asked for sanitary wipes to clean your keyboard. (They probably had some behind the counter.) Using a soft tissue dipped in alcohol once you returned home would also kill germs, as long as you're careful the tissue isn't so saturated that liquid drips beneath the keys.

DEAR ABBY: I have been in a strong relationship with my girlfriend for five years. We are very much in love.

I have told her I don't want to get married and have kids until I have attained some level of success. She understands my desire to be a good provider, but she's 29 and worried about her biological clock if she waits much longer.

I work full time, take night classes and I'm trying to put myself on a promising career path. Is my request unreasonable? We want it to work, but being able to provide at least a middle-class lifestyle is very important to me. -- AMBITIOUS GUY IN SAN DIEGO

DEAR AMBITIOUS: It would be wonderful if there was a blueprint for success in life and marriage, but too often, "life" intervenes. You and your girlfriend should have a serious discussion about the future, because you both have to be comfortable with what happens next.

If she wants to start a family right away and you feel you can't afford it, neither of you will be happy. If she's willing to wait another few years to start a family (her biological clock should still be ticking, or she could freeze her eggs), then it's important you agree about what needs to be in place financially in order for that to happen.

DEAR ABBY: My parents like to visit us and bring along their little dog, "Truffle." We are happy to have them and their dog, however we have an issue. My parents allow Truffle on the furniture. We have a dog and love her to pieces, but feel that furniture is for humans. Because our family likes to relax by sprawling on the couch at times, it's not as pleasant once a pet has been lying there.

My husband has voiced this concern but has been ignored. We are going to visit my parents soon, and I'm wondering how to handle this. We love everyone and don't want to hurt their feelings. I appreciate your advice. -- OFF THE COUCH IN COLORADO

DEAR OFF THE COUCH: If you and your husband prefer that animals stay off the furniture in your home, that's your privilege. In your home, your rules should be respected. If your parents choose to ignore your request, they should stay in a pet-friendly hotel or leave Truffle at home.

However, when you visit in their home, their rules should apply. And if your husband doesn't want to sit or lie on their couch because of the animal hair or the odor, he should sit on a dining chair that can be wiped down, take a washable cover to throw on the couch or stay home.

DEAR ABBY: I've had an online friend for three years. We met on a dating/flirt app in high school and recently met in person. We aren't currently dating, but it's inevitable at this point.

He's funny, down-to-earth and good-looking as hell! What he doesn't know is that prior to meeting him, I had a relationship with a woman, and I think I'm in love with her. I broke things off with her, but now I miss her more and more. I want to reach out to her, but I want him and me to get closer as well. What should I do? -- GIRL WITH OPTIONS IN MAINE

DEAR G.W.O.: What you should do is be honest with both of them and let the scenario play out naturally.