DEAR ABBY: A number of years ago, it came out that my brother-in-law had raped and molested his two daughters and two granddaughters. It tore our family apart.
Although my sister said she intended to divorce him, she never did. She also didn't report it -- so he was never convicted of the crime -- but we all, including my sister, knew it was true. Since then, my sister has disowned her daughters, my mother and me. She still interacts with her son and his family.
I know I shouldn't miss my sister, but I do. I know my mom misses her, too. Abby, how can we get past this? Our family was always close, and now this. The grief is killing me. -- ANGUISHED IN ARKANSAS
DEAR ANGUISHED: It seems there was a conspiracy of silence in the family. Your sister dealt with her husband's crime by choosing to ignore that he is a sexual predator. That your sister has blamed his victims is beyond the pale. Your nieces and grand-nieces should talk with a licensed mental health professional about this, and so should you and your mother. If you're lucky, the person may be able to offer a group discount.