DEAR ABBY: Once I announced my engagement, my already thin, fit mother went on a diet and lost 20 pounds. My weight has always been an issue with her, and I can't believe she would draw attention to it in this way.
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She called me a bridezilla because I told her I think she's trying to showboat my wedding because she's the one with the insecurity issues. I would have been happy to elope, but she insisted on this big wedding to show off to her friends and "recoup the gifts she gave to their kids."
How do we get through the next six months and keep our already fragile relationship intact? -- DAUGHTER OF MOMZILLA
DEAR DAUGHTER: Weddings are supposed to be about the happy couple, not a means for a third party to "recoup" gifts she gave to her friends' children. If you feel you would be happier eloping rather than be miserable "going on with the show," that's what you and your fiance should do. However, if you do decide to go through with the wedding, you and your mother should agree there will be no further discussion about weight -- hers or yours. Period.