DEAR ABBY: Once I announced my engagement, my already thin, fit mother went on a diet and lost 20 pounds. My weight has always been an issue with her, and I can't believe she would draw attention to it in this way.

She called me a bridezilla because I told her I think she's trying to showboat my wedding because she's the one with the insecurity issues. I would have been happy to elope, but she insisted on this big wedding to show off to her friends and "recoup the gifts she gave to their kids."

How do we get through the next six months and keep our already fragile relationship intact? -- DAUGHTER OF MOMZILLA

DEAR DAUGHTER: Weddings are supposed to be about the happy couple, not a means for a third party to "recoup" gifts she gave to her friends' children. If you feel you would be happier eloping rather than be miserable "going on with the show," that's what you and your fiance should do. However, if you do decide to go through with the wedding, you and your mother should agree there will be no further discussion about weight -- hers or yours. Period.

DEAR ABBY: I came into work Monday morning to the news that one of my co-workers had passed away the day before from a massive heart attack. I was shocked and saddened. I was also appalled that my employer posted her death on Facebook less than 24 hours later.

I don't feel that this is an appropriate forum to announce a death, and I also don't think it was my employer's responsibility to notify the world. In my opinion, the family should notify the public if they choose. Are there any rules of etiquette regarding social media and announcing a co-worker's death? -- SAD NEWS IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR SAD NEWS: Of course it is the prerogative of family members to post that kind of news. Ideally, your employer should have waited an extra day or two to allow the family to get the word out. However, unless a family member complained to you about what your employer did, you shouldn't be so quick to judge.

While you have experienced a shocking loss, your boss has, too, particularly if the employee was a longtime one. That he/she shared it on social media isn't surprising these days, considering how much information is being posted online, nor was it a breach of etiquette.

DEAR ABBY: I have been with my boyfriend nearly 19 years, and we both agree that we don't want marriage. I just found out that for the last nine months he has been seeing someone else on his lunch break.

He says he loves me and doesn't want to lose me, but he loves her, too, and she is his friend. He said he would stop the affair, but because she's his friend, he won't stop texting and seeing her "as a friend."

Should I trust what he is saying? We don't have kids together, but we raised his two and my one together as our own. -- SILENT PAIN

DEAR PAIN: Should you trust that your boyfriend won't resume the affair with his "friend" -- or that he has stopped it? I don't think so. Although the two of you aren't formally married, you have had an understanding that lasted almost 19 years, and he has breached it. You now must decide whether you want to be part of a "threesome," and for that, you have my sympathy.

DEAR ABBY: My husband's brother split from his wife, "Charlotte," five years ago and now works and lives in another country. The brothers are still quite close. His school-age daughters live nearby and are close to their cousins, our daughters.

Charlotte's latest boyfriend (they have been dating for 18 months) has started insisting on hanging out with my husband and trying to "bond" with him. He is also jumping with both feet into the role of stepfather, especially with the younger daughter, who has just returned after living with her father for the last seven months.

It feels awkward and weird, but we are too polite to say anything to him or Charlotte because we're afraid she'll restrict us from seeing our nieces. What is your advice? -- ANXIOUS IN AUSTRALIA

DEAR ANXIOUS: Not knowing the terms of your brother-in-law's divorce, my advice is to consider that Charlotte has been with this man for a year and a half. He may be trying to form a relationship with your husband because he wants to bond with "the relatives." Your husband doesn't have to be best friends with him, but he should keep the relationship cordial -- not only for the nieces, but also so his brother can stay informed about them.

DEAR ABBY: I have an addiction to vitamin gummies. They say to eat only two a day, but I eat almost half a container a day. They're sooo good.

This has been a problem for five years. What should I do? Do I contact my doctor? I'm about to graduate from high school, and I think my new college friends will think I'm weird if they find out about my gummy addiction. -- LOVES YUMMY GUMMIES IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR LOVES: I am glad you wrote. Your vitamins may taste like candy, but they are not candy. It is important that you discuss this with your doctor. The least of your troubles could be that your college friends make fun of you. What you have been doing is dangerous because it can cause unsafe levels of vitamin A, vitamin E and minerals like iron to reach toxic levels in your system.

DEAR ABBY: I have a suggestion about how to help the child with the broken glasses mentioned in the letter from "Trying to Help in the West" (Feb. 25). I'm a member of Lions Clubs International. Our local club donates the cost of visual screening and free glasses for those in need who seek our help.

The Lions were established in 1917 by a businessman who wanted to start a service club that would help improve communities. The idea quickly spread to other communities and became international.

In 1925, Helen Keller inspired the clubs to become "knights of the blind in the crusade against darkness." Since then, Lions have worked tirelessly to aid blind and visually impaired individuals in the U.S. and all over the world. Services for the boy in the letter should be available in his area, or he can be directed to the closest local Lions Club. -- MEMBER IN WEST LONG BRANCH, N.J.

DEAR MEMBER: Thank you for reminding me -- and my readers -- about the good work the Lions Clubs do. Anyone wanting further information about this worthwhile service organization can find it at www.lionsclubs.org.

DEAR ABBY: My son, a junior in college, is trying to get a summer job. His degree is challenging, and he has a good work ethic plus job experience. Because he hasn't had much luck applying online, I have been calling local businesses to see what's available while he's working hard at school.

A problem I'm encountering is something I never had to deal with in my own job search. It's companies asking if he wants an internship. They say they can't pay him to train him. Can you explain the basis of this response? -- WANTS TO KNOW IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR WANTS TO KNOW: The basis may be economic. The companies don't want to spend the money on an intern, particularly one who exhibits such little initiative that his mother has to call to inquire about a job for him. Keep in mind that some internships have been known to lead to permanent positions. Your son may have better luck if he places the calls himself.

DEAR ABBY: What is proper when hosting guests from out of state? In a few months, two different relatives will be visiting me separately, each for two weeks. For years it has been my custom to go to church early on Sunday and then to brunch with friends. I don't mind giving up the brunch, but I don't want to miss church for an entire month. (I'm a widow now and I enjoy the fellowship.)

One relative is a non-churchgoer, and the other is a Jehovah's Witness. Neither will attend with me even though I invite them. (I tried that.) How do I handle this? -- CHURCH OR NO CHURCH

DEAR C. OR N.C.: Having houseguests does not mean you are shackled together the entire time they stay with you. Because you have "tried that" and your offer was rejected, they already know you like to attend church.

Handle the situation by telling them you will be going to early services on Sunday and then to brunch with some of the church members afterward. If you're worried about feeding your houseguests, tell them there will be lox, bagels and cream cheese waiting in the fridge when they get up -- something from almost every food group.

DEAR ABBY: I have a slightly different version of a "Pennies From Heaven" letter for you.

My darling grandmother would often tell my brother and me she had a "Yankee dime" for us -- which meant a kiss. Not long after her death, I started finding shiny dimes in the strangest places -- under birthday gifts, by the Christmas tree and in my kitchen (which is my happy place). My heart fills as the dimes continue to pile up. I save them all.

If I had a penny for every Yankee dime I got while growing up, I'd be very rich. -- SUZANNE IN OCALA, FLA.

DEAR SUZANNE: You are rich! You were blessed to have had a grandmother who loved you and your brother and demonstrated it every chance she got. What a wonderful legacy to leave behind.