DEAR ABBY: My mother is dating a married man, and this is not the first time. While I love her, I don't think what she's doing is right.

This affair has been going on for years. I tried broaching the subject with her, but she said it's her business and unless I'm helping to pay her bills, I don't have the right to give my opinion. It's frustrating because she's driving all over the state with this man. She has two younger daughters at home and she's rarely home with them.

Our entire family dislikes her lover, but she insists on bringing him around "so we can get to know him." I don't want to judge her, but it's hard sometimes. Am I wrong for trying to give her my two cents, or should I mind my own business? -- DISAPPOINTED IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR DISAPPOINTED: You have already given your mother your two cents and she has discounted it. It should be apparent to you by now that she has no intention of ending this relationship, regardless of your disapproval.

Rather than mind your own business, because you want to do something helpful, be as loving and supportive of your younger sisters as you can. From your description of your mother's behavior, they need love and attention from an adult they are not receiving from her.

DEAR ABBY: I was divorced 23 years ago. Before I started dating again, I got a hairpiece and have worn one ever since. Some people are aware that I wear a hairpiece, including my current wife of 20 years. It does make me look a lot younger.

I will be turning 55 this year. I'd like to stop wearing the hairpiece and shave my head instead because I have only a fringe of my own hair left. How should I go about it without getting 50,000 questions from friends and family, and what would be a good answer when I'm asked? -- HAIR TODAY, GONE TOMORROW

DEAR H.T.G.T.: Removing your hairpiece will be a statement in itself. Afterward, do not be surprised if you receive compliments about your new look. Should anyone ask why you decided to do it, tell the truth. Many men with receding hairlines shave their heads and look terrific.

DEAR ABBY: My son died two months ago. He was 51. It happened on my daughter's birthday. She says that her birthdays have now stopped.

Next year will be a milestone for her as she will be turning 50. How in the world do we celebrate her 50th birthday when we will be thinking about the one-year anniversary of her brother's death? Some friends suggested we have her birthday celebration a few days early, which I feel is not right. Please help. -- CAROLE IN ARIZONA

DEAR CAROLE: I'm sorry for the loss of your son. From now on, your daughter's birthday will likely always be bittersweet for her as well as you. That's why I think she should take your friends' suggestion and separate the two events, if possible. A small family get-together around the anniversary date of your son's death might be more appropriate for everyone, at least this time around.

DEAR ABBY: I am in an interracial relationship with a guy whose parents don't support our being together because I'm from a different race and culture than he is. Our countries of origin were antagonistic in the past.

When his parents tell him to break off relations with me, he listens patiently and defends his affection for me. He does not, however, really speak up for me or point out how unfair their prejudice is, given that they've never even met me.

This is my first interracial relationship. My parents don't have a problem with it. Is it too much to ask my boyfriend to speak up the next time his parents lecture him? -- UNDEFENDED IN THE SOUTH

DEAR UNDEFENDED: Not knowing your boyfriend, his parents or how they relate to one another, I can't judge whether he should challenge them any further than he is already. I think it would be a mistake for you to try to script him. You didn't mention how long you two have been involved, but if the relationship continues, they may -- at some point -- mellow.

DEAR ABBY: You and your readers may consider my problem trivial, but to me it's really irritating. My wife, who is in her early 60s, has the figure of a 40-year-old. She's a great lover, fabulous cook, wonderful mother to our four children and warms my heart when I see her enter the room.

The problem is, my teeth are spaced rather far apart, and food gets stuck between them. After every meal, I need to use a toothpick, yet she refuses to put toothpicks -- even in an attractive container -- on the table. She says they will just collect dust and are not pretty. On top of that, she refuses to allow a pill container for my vitamins or heart medicine.

I would never leave her over this, but what can I do with this stubborn, but otherwise wonderful woman? -- PICK-LESS IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR PICK-LESS: Your nearly perfect wife may prefer that you pick your teeth somewhere other than at the table, and would like you to take your medications elsewhere as well. While it would be nice if she were more solicitous, you may have to appreciate her for the other fine qualities you mentioned, because it doesn't appear that she's going to budge to accommodate you.

DEAR ABBY: I have a 39-year-old daughter I'll call "Angela" who attracts unsavory underground types -- thieves, druggies, homeless -- wherever she lives. My husband and I recently decided to move to Mexico because we are both retired. My husband and son are driving his vehicle, and I am driving my own.

My husband asked me if I wanted to invite Angela to drive with me. I'm afraid if I do, she may decide to stay with us after we arrive, and more of those unsavory types will start coming around. Should I not worry about it? I'm in need of practical advice. -- RETIREE IN THE WEST

DEAR RETIREE: You are making a new start. My "practical advice" is to follow your better judgment and resist the urge to invite your daughter to accompany you on the journey.

DEAR ABBY: I am married to a great guy. We've been together 27 years, so I know him well. He recently stopped smoking after 30 years of nicotine addiction. He did it cold turkey, and he's been smoke-free for three months now. I'm proud of him and tell him so.

The problem is, when he drinks he gets drunk -- which I'm used to -- but then he starts saying (sometimes belligerently) that he wants a cigarette badly. I don't know how to respond to this. I continue praising him for quitting and point out the health benefits that are already obvious -- his breathing, returned senses, etc. -- but it's getting old.

Should I continue to say helpful things or just ignore him when he's drunk? -- DUMBFOUNDED IN DALLAS

DEAR DUMBFOUNDED: Try this. Tell him calmly that his craving for a cigarette is normal, particularly if he used to smoke while consuming alcohol. Reassure him that with time the craving will lessen, and continue to reinforce that he did himself a huge favor by mustering up the willpower to quit. Tell him you know it wasn't easy and that the longer he resists the urge for a nicotine fix, the easier it will be for him to stay smoke-free.

The fact that he becomes "belligerent" when he drinks should be a sign to you that he probably shouldn't be drinking either. Instead of keeping him company when he's in his cups, consider leaving to attend an Al-Anon meeting. It's a supportive organization created for friends and family members who are affected by a loved one's alcohol consumption. It isn't difficult to find a meeting. Just go to al-anon.org.

DEAR ABBY: I was in a relationship with a man for a year and a half. We got along great. We never argued, and we had a healthy sexual relationship.

You know the saying, "Actions speak louder than words"? All the actions were there -- he took me on amazing vacations, introduced me to all of his friends and family. But during all our time together, he never once expressed how he felt about me. He never even called me "Honey," or "Babe."

About a month ago, I told him how I felt. I came right out and asked if he loved me or had any kind of romantic feelings for me. He ignored my question! I guess he didn't want to hurt me more by saying no. Two weeks later, he broke up with me.

I have been divorced for five years, while he has never been married or had a live-in girlfriend. He said his reason for breaking up was he felt our relationship was good but not great (!) and he didn't think it ever would be. This is painful, but I can't help holding onto hope. Should I just give up and move on? -- GOOD, BUT NOT GREAT

DEAR G.B.N.G.: Yes, for your own sake, you must. Give him credit for having been honest with you, but if after a year and a half he wasn't able to summon up any romantic feelings for you, you must accept that it isn't going to happen. Moving on may be painful for a while, but you will be doing yourself a big favor. Start now.