DEAR ABBY: Our son-in-law, "Brody," has a very different lifestyle than ours and the one in which we raised our daughter. I pointed it out to her while they were dating, and she was not pleased. I decided to say no more and try to accept him as best as possible, although I admit my husband has been better at it than I have.

One thing that continues to bother us is that whenever we invite them out for dinner, Brody will order the most expensive thing on the menu. He also has a couple of drinks, upgrades his salad and orders dessert. By the time he's done, the cost of his meal is double that of everyone else's.

Although we can afford it, we feel this is bad manners. I'm not sure if he's trying to take advantage of us or if he just thinks he is entitled. Our daughter thinks he's wonderful and doesn't seem to mind that he does this. I worry that it may reflect badly on her when they are out with others. Is this acceptable? Do we grin and bear it? Or should we say something and, if so, what do we say? -- PAYING DEARLY IN MONTANA

DEAR PAYING: If you bring the subject up, I can almost guarantee that what you say will not be well received. What your son-in-law is doing is "acceptable" in light of the fact that you say you can afford it. If you couldn't, I assume those dinner invitations would be few and far between, and you would have had to explain the reason to your daughter. When they dine out with contemporaries, presumably the bill is split between the couples. If that isn't the case, it probably wouldn't happen twice because the other couple would likely request separate checks.

DEAR ABBY: I am the editor of a local newspaper and manage two others. Your message (March 27) about it being "too late" to run a wedding announcement is nonsense. We regularly receive announcements six to seven months after weddings. Also, the announcement does not have to be submitted by the couple. Grandparents or parents in the community can send them, too.

Young people today think that once something is on social media it is "official," forgetting that not everyone is on social media, and not everyone is connected to their profiles. So please tell the person who wrote that letter to send in that wedding announcement and enjoy having the hard copy memento of a happy occasion. I wouldn't be surprised if someday those newlyweds will be very happy to have a physical copy of their announcement. -- NEWSPAPER LADY IN KANSAS

DEAR NEWSPAPER LADY: I'm glad you wrote because I'm sure many readers will benefit from it. However, the writer of that letter stated that her daughter-in-law said she didn't want the announcement in the newspaper and her son agreed. I cannot "bless" the writer going against their wishes, which were made clear.

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I have been married just over a year. It's the second marriage for both of us. Since our wedding, my father-in-law continually "reminds" us that he helped my wife financially after her divorce. He does it because he wants us to continually acknowledge that fact.

I have offered to write a check and pay him back for all he did for her during that time, but he refused because he doesn't want the money; he wants the appreciation. To him what that means is when he calls on the phone, we answer. When he and his wife drop by, we are home, etc. I feel that since I have offered to pay him back and he refused the money, the slate is wiped clean. Your thoughts? -- NOT SON-IN-LAW OF THE YEAR

DEAR SON-IN-LAW: Your father-in-law regards his generosity as a means to control your wife -- and you by extension. You are not required to answer your phone if you prefer not to talk at a particular time, and you certainly do not have to entertain him and his wife at the drop of a hat. The next time the subject comes up, explain that to him, hand him a check and let the chips fall where they may.

DEAR ABBY: My best friend is pregnant. Her husband is a lazy jerk who, during her last pregnancy, caused her to miscarry. It happened after he informed her he was filing for divorce and marrying a mail-order bride.

I can't bring myself to be happy for her. What do I do? How can I be happy for the person who means the most to me, but will probably lean on me for more support than I can or want to give? -- BEST FRIEND BLUES IN KENTUCKY

DEAR B.F.B.: Friends do lean on each other for support, but you can only do what you can do. Frankly, I am surprised that she's still with the husband who treated her so shabbily. Help her in those areas that you can, but ultimately understand that she is responsible for her own choices. If she needs more help than you can give her, encourage her to reach out to a professional.

DEAR ABBY: A colleague of mine was let go a few days ago and it shocked us all. I imagine it was even more shocking to her. She seemed to have a good deal of responsibility outside of her normal role, and from what we saw, she was excellent at her job.

We weren't close friends outside of work, but we would text each other now and again and I consider her someone I would like to keep in touch with. Would it be inappropriate to text her and offer my condolences? -- ETIQUETTE ADVICE IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR ETIQUETTE: You are entitled to a personal life outside the office. I don't think it would be inappropriate to reach out to her on your own time. As long as you don't discuss it at work, it is your business and no one else's.

DEAR ABBY: When my wife was 17 (she's now 54), she was in a car accident. She and her three friends were high and drunk. She suffered two skull fractures, which have affected her memory. She thinks it's my job to remind her of things and becomes angry to the point of hitting things when I don't do it. I feel her schedule is her responsibility. But when I tell her that, she claims I am not being "supportive." -- UNSURE IN THE SOUTH

DEAR UNSURE: In successful marriages the division of labor is usually "each according to his ability, each according to his need." Your wife's schedule should be her responsibility, and if your wife were irresponsible, I'd agree with you. However, because she suffered a traumatic brain injury, she may be unable to be as organized as you are and need your help. That said, "hitting things" when she becomes frustrated is not appropriate, and she needs to find a less threatening and destructive way of venting.

DEAR ABBY: Because our country's marriage laws recently changed, my partner and I have decided, after 16 years together, to be married. If something unfortunate were to happen to one of us a few years down the road, what's the proper way to acknowledge our marriage in an obituary?

Technically, we could say, "He is survived by his husband of two years," but that would discount the 16 years we were together and would have been married had the laws permitted it. But saying that he is survived by his husband of 18 years seems misleading as well. How can our many years together be honored without being misrepresented? -- OBITUARY ETIQUETTE

DEAR OBITUARY ETIQUETTE: How about this: He is survived by his husband and partner of 18 years.

DEAR ABBY: I have a problem with my family that's driving me crazy. They are Facebook snobs. I prefer not to join Facebook for personal reasons, and because I haven't, they don't keep me up to date regarding special events such as births, family picnics, etc. They each expect the other ones to notify me, and no matter how often I ask, they'll say, "Oh, 'So-and-So' was supposed to let you know." It's not like I am estranged from any of them; it's just that they keep insisting I should join Facebook, and I'm tired of hearing it. Advice? -- NO SOCIAL MEDIA FOR ME

DEAR NO SOCIAL MEDIA: There are other ways to communicate online than Facebook. Are you on the internet at all? If you are, you could be notified of events through group email, group chat or group texting. I don't think it's fair to expect your relatives to make a special effort to keep you in the loop.