DEAR ABBY: I am a successful business professional in my mid-50s. I have put my children through college, and they have no student loans. (My wife did not help with any of the college expenses. It was all on me.)

I am finally at a point in my life that I can pursue my passion of buying a sports car. I have always been a car guy, and my wife knows it. When I bring up the subject of purchasing the car of my dreams, which is not very expensive, she tells me I will look like an idiot. In her next breath she says it's OK if I buy a sports car if it is the one she wants, and of course, the one she wants is very expensive.

No matter how I broach the subject, she does not "get" that it is not about her but about my passion as a car guy. How do I get her to see my side? -- REVVING UP IN NEW YORK

DEAR REVVING UP: If it's your money paying for the car, you don't have to get her to see your side. It will be yours -- not hers -- and you should buy the one that gives you pleasure and drive it to your heart's content.

DEAR ABBY: I have been with "Roger" for 28 years. He is basically a good, honest man, but he thinks only of himself. When I had heart surgery, he left me alone at the hospital that night, not knowing if I would live or die. (Nothing would have kept me from his bedside!) I'll be having knee surgery soon, and he won't take the day off or a sick day to take me. He wants a friend of ours to do it.

These are just two samples of his lack of support for me. I guess there is no way to make someone care enough about you to put their conveniences aside. When we moved out of state, he said if he didn't find a job, he was going back home. Well, where would that have left me?

Roger wouldn't have anything at all if it weren't for me. I know I should dump him, but after 28 years, I can't pull the rug out from under him. He cops an attitude and makes me feel bad if I press the subject. I only wish he would do something for me from his heart, but I guess it isn't there. Any advice, Abby? -- HIS LAST PRIORITY IN FLORIDA

DEAR LAST PRIORITY: Yes, because you can't bring yourself to pull the rug out from under Roger, it might help you to memorize the Serenity Prayer when he disappoints you in the future. It goes like this: "Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."

DEAR ABBY: My mother was a stickler when it came to table manners. She had a little 1-inch-long ceramic pink pig that she placed in front of me every time I did something Emily Post would frown on. I hated that little pig. -- RALPH IN ARROYO GRANDE, CALIF.

DEAR RALPH: Now, now. You should have been grateful to that little pig, because it kept you from becoming a big one.

DEAR ABBY: I'm having a hard time deciding if I should forgive my husband or tell him enough is enough. In the year since our wedding, he became infatuated with one of my bridesmaids to the point of telling her -- and me -- that he loved her. He also flirted with women online, lied to my face about it, and asked for and received nude pictures from a "friend" and an ex.

We have been in counseling for about a month now, but we're moving soon, and I'm not sure I want to move with him, even though he now says he wants to fix things. We have a small child together, which affects my decision. What should I do? -- NOT SURE IN NEW HAMPSHIRE

DEAR NOT SURE: It appears that the man you married was not mature enough to make that commitment. That the two of you are now in counseling and he wants to make things work is hopeful. However, considering what has been going on for the past year, I can understand your serious doubts. Because you already have a counselor helping you to work on your marriage, I think you should take your question to -- and your cues from -- the person with whom you are working.

DEAR ABBY: I am going to be a great-grandmother soon, and I'm very excited about it. I didn't think I would live to experience this great joy. My beautiful granddaughter is not married to the baby's father, but is a mature and loving person.

Although her immediate family is supportive, the extended family is not and refuses to acknowledge it. My sisters will call me and talk about anything and everything except my granddaughter and the baby that is coming. I don't know what to make of their conduct. I feel like hanging up on them, or telling them off and being done with them.

They are never going to experience being great-grandmothers themselves. Could they be jealous or angry that this happened? Please tell me how to handle it. Their health isn't good, so if I cut them off, it could be forever. -- PERPLEXED IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR PERPLEXED: Your sisters could be jealous or angry, as you suspect. They could also be judgmental and trying to "punish" your granddaughter for being pregnant and unwed by ignoring her.

I don't blame you for feeling angry, and possibly hurt, for the way they are behaving. You're entitled. But the question you must answer for yourself is, would you be better off with or without those "sweethearts" in your life? Only you can answer that one.

DEAR ABBY: I have been dating my boyfriend for nine months, and for the first time, at 28, I can say I know what love is. Marriage is in the future, which brings me to my question. How and when do I tell him I was adopted? -- EAST COAST GIRL

DEAR EAST COAST GIRL: Frankly, I'm surprised this hasn't already been discussed as part of your getting to know each other. You are acting like having been adopted is some kind of guilty secret, and it's not. Tell your boyfriend in a quiet environment in which you can discuss it, preferably when you're having dinner and when you both feel relaxed and comfortable, so you can answer any questions he may ask you.

DEAR ABBY: My mother-in-law has begun doing the "pop-in." My husband passive-aggressively hinted that he wished he had known she was coming over. Her response was, "I'm your mother; I don't need to let you know when I'm coming over." I regard this as total disrespect.

She has done this plenty of times -- including popping in when I was having a dinner with my parents and children, which made her mad because she and my father-in-law hadn't been invited.

She did the pop-in again last week. My husband, four children and I were about to sit down to a family dinner when she rang the doorbell. I didn't have enough food for her and my father-in-law, which made us all uncomfortable. She made a sarcastic comment, "Gee, I guess I shouldn't have come over," then she sat in the living room staring at us as we ate.

I have begged my husband to say something, but he says it would be disrespectful. I said it is disrespectful that she comes over without checking with us first. What's your take on this? -- NO POP-INS, PLEASE

DEAR NO POP-INS: You have my sympathy. Your mother-in-law is a handful. Your husband may be so cowed by his mother that he's afraid to assert himself. You are under no obligation to entertain anyone who pops in, including her. The next time she shows up unannounced, remind her to call first and suggest that she come back some other time.

DEAR ABBY: My fiancee has a 15-year-old son, "Jason," who spends countless hours in his room playing Xbox with his buddies. He is loud and obviously has fun, by the sound of it. However, when he comes out for meals, he doesn't communicate or answer questions like, "How was school?" or "What do you think of that?"

My fiancee and I don't live together. We see each other three times a year for two to three weeks at a time. My fiancee says Jason acts the same way whether I'm here or not. He isn't close with his dad, either.

Is this a phase that he will grow out of, or does he need professional help? We get along, but there is never much conversation. I ask questions to encourage interaction, but it hasn't been successful. -- FRUSTRATED IN MONTANA

DEAR FRUSTRATED: Whether Jason's going through a phase or not depends on whether he has always had poor verbal skills and ignored questions he was asked. He might be reluctant to answer because he's having problems socially or academically in school, or because the opinions you're asking for concern things he has never given much thought to.

Boys that age are sometimes less verbal than when they are older, and their dependence on social media has contributed to it. Teens who spend most of their time in the virtual world tend to have lower verbal abilities than those who spend less.

If you and your fiancee are truly concerned, she should talk about this with a counselor at Jason's school and ask if counseling or intervention of any kind is needed.