DEAR ABBY: I have been with my boyfriend, "Jake," for a year and a half. To put it mildly, his dad does not like me. He has never thought I was good enough for his son, and he doesn't like the fact that I have a daughter from an earlier relationship. He thinks I'm interested in Jake only for his money, even though I work a full-time job and Jake and I share everything equally, except my daughter's expenses. I pay for those myself.
When Jake and I attend family gatherings for holidays or birthdays, his dad refuses to say hello to me. He does, however, make derogatory or negative remarks about me to Jake. It's incredibly hurtful and demeaning.
I have tried bringing it up to Jake, and he agrees. But he will not address it with his dad because "Dad won't change." Can you help? -- DISLIKED IN MASSACHUSETTS
DEAR DISLIKED: I don't know how serious Jake is about you, but if he was in love with you and planned on marrying you, he would INSIST that, at the very least, his father treat you with respect. Dad won't change because his son isn't assertive enough to make plain that if he doesn't, he will be seeing less of the both of you. I can only hope that your child isn't on the receiving end of this kind of treatment, because if that's happening -- for both of your sakes -- I'm advising you to end the romance with Jake.