DEAR ABBY: After 27 years of marriage, my wife told me she is attracted to other women. To my knowledge, she has acted on this only once.

Every day I wonder where our relationship stands. One day she can't see herself without me; the next, she says we should divorce. I don't know if I should end this or wait to see where it goes.

I will need counseling if we divorce, but currently I can't afford it. Yes, I love her, but what matters most to me is that she is happy. I don't have anyone else to talk to about this. Any suggestions? -- MR. D. IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR MR. D.: After 27 years of marriage I can only imagine how shocking your wife's revelation must have been for you. That she is ambivalent about your marriage must be deeply painful because you are being treated like a yo-yo.

The book "The Other Side of the Closet," by Amity Pierce Buxton, Ph.D., has been mentioned before in my column and has proven helpful to others in your situation. There is also a support group called the Straight Spouse Network (www.straightspouse.org), which offers emotional support after a wife or a husband comes out as yours did. Please don't wait to read the book and visit the website. I think you will find them comforting.

DEAR ABBY: I have a large family consisting of many grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Looking through my photo albums, I can't complain that I don't have enough photos of my children, but it's a parade of tongues.

Their mothers all post photos on social media with their tongues hanging out. The children then mimic their moms and their photos are disgusting as well. I would love to have photos of my children minus the slimy organ.

Is this accepted behavior in our society now? Please, can someone enlighten me as to the inspiration of this repulsive action? -- CLOSED-MOUTHED IN THE SOUTH

DEAR CLOSED-MOUTHED: I suspect it originated back in the 1970s when Gene Simmons of Kiss licked his way to the top of the music charts. Lately, Miley Cyrus took up the torch and is keeping it burning brightly. Children often stick out their tongues when they are forced to have their picture taken or are trying to be funny, but I don't think Gene and Miley fall into that category. Quite the opposite, in fact.

DEAR ABBY: Sometimes I'll call a close friend or business associate for lunch with the goal of having a quality one-on-one conversation on a wide range of topics. After the lunch is set, more than one of them has then invited other people I know, but with whom I do not have the same quality relationship. It is not a pleasant surprise.

I find it irritating, because it invariably changes the dynamic of the conversation. I never say anything about it, but it bothers me. Is my reaction reasonable, or should I just roll with this? -- THWARTED IN DALLAS

DEAR THWARTED: Your reaction is perfectly reasonable. The first time it happened, you should have shared your feelings with the person who did it. It has happened again because you didn't speak up. Now you will have to warn the person you're inviting in advance.

DEAR ABBY: I have been married for 10 years. Four years ago, while waiting for our divorce to be finalized, I decided I'd start dating online and suggested she do the same. We were still friends, so I didn't think it was crossing any boundaries.

My online dating efforts were met with peculiar results. All of the six women I connected with either stood me up or made excuses why they couldn't or wouldn't meet me in person. Out of frustration I began dating my wife again and we canceled the divorce proceedings.

About a year after we got back together, my wife confessed that the women I had reached out to online were all fictitious personae that she had constructed with the intent of exhausting my search efforts. It worked.

We are now filing for divorce again, and I'm worried she may do the same thing. What can I do? -- SOUTHERN GUY

DEAR SOUTHERN GUY: Because you think your wife might pull that stunt again, stop sharing any details of your online dating pursuits with her. Definitely refrain from telling her which sites you're using. (Use different ones than before.)

Or, hearken back to the good old days and try meeting people in person. The worst that could happen might be that you encounter your soon-to-be ex in various disguises -- but you know her well enough by now that you should be able to see through them.

DEAR ABBY: I am engaged to a wonderful man, and we will be married soon. We have been together two years and get along well. His parents live 35 minutes away and his mom doesn't drive.

The other day he commented that she wanted us to invite her over, as she hadn't been over in a year. I told him his mother is always welcome and should just call to make sure we are home. He then proceeded to tell me he wanted her to spend the night. He said that in his previous relationship, his mother would stay over occasionally.

I didn't know what to say, but at the age of 40, should he really be wanting sleepovers? It struck me as odd. I'm a private person and I'm not sure how to resolve this. I don't want him to feel I'm rejecting his mom, but I don't see why she needs to spend the night. I don't want to walk on eggshells with her, because she called and scolded me about how I spoke to her son several months ago. Advice? -- LADY OF THE HOUSE

DEAR LADY: Is there something you haven't mentioned? Why has it been a year since your fiance's mother has been invited to visit? Certainly in all this time you could have picked her up. A blanket "come anytime, just call first" isn't a proper invitation -- particularly if the person doesn't drive.

If you prefer she not be an overnight guest, I don't think your fiance should force it. And if you prefer that she not meddle in your relationship with her son, I hope you made it clear to her when she "scolded" you. Of course, it wouldn't have happened if her son hadn't tattled to her -- which should be a glimpse of what marriage to him may be like if you don't get this straightened out now.

DEAR ABBY: I just read the letter from "Expecting in Canada" (Sept. 8) and am disappointed in her daughters' reaction to her pregnancy, as were you.

My own mother announced she was pregnant with my baby brother when she was 42 and my sister and I were in college. Now, 46 years later, I can say he is one of the best things that ever happened to our family. He took great care of both my parents as they grew older and was with them when each passed away. My sister and I are very close to him, even though we nicknamed him "the crown prince" and teased him because that's how my parents treated him.

I hope "Expecting's" daughters will eventually embrace this great gift. If they don't, they may miss out on a wonderful experience and a lot of love. -- ELDER SISTER OF THE CROWN PRINCE

DEAR ELDER SISTER: Thank you for your letter. Readers wrote to share their personal experiences as you did. Most agreed that having a child with older parents and siblings can be a life-changing event. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: I was a surprise baby. My birth mother was 40 and my birth father was 67. My sisters were 15 and 16. The older one was not happy; the younger one loved having a baby sister.

As fate would have it, my mother died when I was 7 years old. My father was too old to care for a child, so my older sister, the one who hadn't been thrilled with my arrival, and her husband became my "parents." Not every day was perfect, but my life was very blessed.

My sister, whom I called Momma, became ill in her 60s, and my brother-in-law, whom I called Daddy for the rest of his life, also had health problems. I became their "legs" for many errands. When Daddy died I became Momma's primary caregiver.

I would like those two girls to know that the little "intruder" may just be the one who takes care of them someday. I'm shocked that the parents would even entertain the idea of giving the baby away. -- JUDY IN LOUISIANA

DEAR ABBY: When I was a junior in high school, my mother told me she was pregnant. I was disgusted and angry, and I told her so. As I reflect back on it, I'm mortified that I could be so cruel. After giving it more thought, I realized I was annoyed to think my parents were sexual beings.

Teenagers that age are just coming to terms with their own sexuality. They can also be somewhat selfish and self-absorbed. While it may be a family matter to some extent, it really is between the mother and father.

My little brother is very close to me now and, more important, close to my children, who are nearer in age to him. I hope that mother won't let the temporary opinion of the daughters ruin a beautiful experience of a shared love. -- CHERYL IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR ABBY: "Expecting" should ask her daughters to be a part of the baby's life, such as going to doctor's appointments, picking out clothes, decorating the room, giving name suggestions and having them participate in a baby shower. -- STEPHANIE IN ILLINOIS

DEAR ABBY: When my mother was 42, my baby brother was born. I was 17 when I became his nanny and learned how to take care of a baby. It was an experience that made me more mature. After I married, I was never able to have my own children.

Please don't listen to your daughters. I know what it's like. Perhaps they are jealous that they have to share their parents. My mom and dad were the oldest parents at PTA meetings, graduations, etc., but they were proud of my younger brother. Many times people thought they were the grandparents. We shared many laughs during those years. -- EILEEN IN WEST VIRGINIA