DEAR ABBY: I'm a 14-year-old girl and I have a boy best friend who is also 14. I liked him the moment I met him, which was exactly a year ago. He says it's the same for him.

We established that we both liked each other months ago, but we're still only friends. The reason is his parents have a rule that he can't have a girlfriend or go on dates until he's 16. He's the only one I want, but we have to wait until he can ask me out.

For now we are best friends, but it's hard not to want to hold his hand and kiss him and stuff like that. He doesn't like his parents' rule just as much as I don't, and he totally doesn't want to wait, but he will. It's also very hard to not tell him how much my feelings have grown, because I'm afraid he will react strangely if I tell him I think I might love him. What should I do? -- TEEN IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR TEEN: If your intuition is telling you not to be the first to say, "I love you," then listen to it and you may be pleasantly surprised one day to hear him say it to you first. As to the fact that his parents are strict, you really don't have much choice other than to respect their rules.

That said, younger teens aren't usually restricted from having any social contact at all. Before they start dating one-on-one, they usually get together in groups for movies, sporting events, school dances, etc. This should give the two of you opportunities to see each other outside of school. While this may not be the answer you're looking for, for the time being, it may be an acceptable compromise.

DEAR ABBY: I work in the retail industry at a high-end furniture store. We specialize in custom furniture from top manufacturers. We have been in business for many years and have many repeat customers.

My question is about customer service. Our hours of operation are normal, from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. But we often have customers who arrive at 5:45 p.m. or later to see sales associates and order their furniture. Because our furniture is custom, the process can take up to an hour. Some associates have stayed as late as 8 p.m. to work with a customer who walks in without an appointment.

When is it appropriate to let the customer know we are closing and they should come back at another time for their consultation? We try to work with everyone, but in my opinion, it's rude to assume we are obligated to stay and cater to them when it is our time to go home to our families. -- WAITING TILL THE LAST MINUTE

DEAR WAITING: You're not wrong. I agree it's rude to assume that people will stay hours after closing time, but if there are no hard and fast rules in your store, sales personnel may be stuck. It's one thing if the sale is being finished, but to start the process just before closing time is an imposition. Some stores stop processing orders before the official closing time, which nips the problem in the bud.

As to whether you are "obligated" to accommodate high-end customers, this is something you should discuss with your employer. Some businesses are willing to cater to buyers of high-end merchandise, and yours may be one of them.

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I have been married three years. It has been rocky since year two. She's a great mother to our kids, especially the one who is medically challenged. We have broken up twice so far, and are now back together. However, because of my job, we live in different states.

Bottom line: I'm no longer sure this is the right relationship for me. She goes to school full time while I work a ton of overtime to support two households. We hardly see or spend time with each other. She has said she would rather me work and not see me so that everything gets paid. I feel she's more about the money than the marriage. What do you think? -- UNHAPPILY MARRIED IN BALTIMORE

DEAR UNHAPPILY: You and your wife both appear to be carrying a heavy load. For the sake of your children, it would be nice if your marriage could be resuscitated. However, not every marriage can be -- and the arrangement you have now is clearly not working for you.

If your wife actually feels that she would rather not see you so that everything gets paid, then I think she has made her feelings clear. The marriage no longer exists; it's a financial arrangement. For that, you both have my sympathy.

DEAR ABBY: Why does it feel awkward for me to call my husband by his first name? When I say his name from another room to get his attention, it only feels natural for me to call him "Babe."

When I'm talking about him to someone else, I use his name, but it still makes me cringe. It's a perfectly normal, common name, so I don't know why it makes me so uncomfortable. And this doesn't just apply to my husband. Before him, I was in a six-year relationship with my high school sweetheart and had the same problem.

Why can I only call my significant others "Babe" when talking to them? -- HUBBY'S NAME IS ________

DEAR HUBBY'S NAME: When couples become intimately involved, it is common for them to use pet names with each other. That you call your husband and your former boyfriend by the SAME name is interesting. Could it be that subconsciously you are/were afraid that if you don't use the same pet name, you will absentmindedly use the wrong one?

DEAR ABBY: My cousin and I have season tickets for the Broadway series at our local theater. Our problem is two women who sit next to us in the box. After intermission, when the second act starts, they talk loudly to each other as long as 10 minutes into the show. I want to say something, but I don't want to cause any negativity or bad feelings because we will see them at each show. How should I deal with it? -- AUDIENCE MEMBER

DEAR MEMBER: Here's how: When the women continue their conversation after the curtain rises, you say to the one nearest you, "Please be quiet. We can't hear the performance." That's not rude; it's being assertive. If they persist after that, complain to the management and ask that, if possible, in the future you be seated apart from the magpies.

DEAR ABBY: After I became an adult and left home, my father remarried a woman with a grown son. "Jack" has been incarcerated for the past several years. I have only vague information about what he did, but I do know it was related to drugs and gang affiliation.

His mother insists he was "framed" and refuses to talk about the charges. I haven't been able to find any public information except that this wasn't the first time he was arrested. My father has hinted that there is a bigger story there, but he keeps quiet out of respect for his wife's feelings.

Jack will be released soon, and my stepmom is already planning big family events for us to welcome him home. I have a wife and kids now, and I'm not sure I want them around an ex-con. At the same time, I don't really know what happened, and I don't want to start a family rift. What should I do next? -- WHAT'S THE SECRET?

DEAR WHAT'S: Talk to your father and tell him that unless you know the whole story about what Jack did that you will not be a part of the welcome home party. As a parent, you have a right to know whether your children could be in danger if they are around him and base your decision on it. Not that Jack might ever hurt your children, but should a rival gang member come after him, they might be collateral damage, as we so often read about these days. Better to err on the side of caution.

DEAR ABBY: I was divorced 10 years ago. My children are all over 21. I talk with them once a month, but I contact my ex-wife only when there's an issue that relates to our kids.

My ex now has cancer. When she dies, am I expected to attend the funeral? I would like to go as a show of respect to my kids. However, I don't know how they would react because they know I have had little contact with their mother for the last decade.

The same question goes for my ex-mother-in-law, who is almost 90. I had a good relationship with her until the divorce, at which point she would no longer talk to me. Should I be there since she is the grandmother of my children? -- PLANNING AHEAD

DEAR PLANNING: I think your question may be somewhat premature. Your relationship with your ex-wife and her mother may improve before anyone dies -- and let's admit it, YOU could be the one to go first.

If there is any chance that your presence at her mother's funeral would upset your ex-wife, then I vote for skipping it and explaining the reason to your children. As to attending your ex's funeral when (and IF) the time comes, remember that funerals are to comfort the living. During one of your monthly conversations with your children -- once your ex-wife is determined to be terminal and NOT before -- ask what their wishes are and abide by them.