DEAR ABBY: I recently found a notebook of my mom's. On the outside cover it said, "Disclaimer: Do Not Open Unless You're Me!" Being the curious soul that I am, I opened it despite the disclaimer.
Advertisement
As I flipped through the pages, I learned many things about my mom that I didn't know, like her faith in God and how the things that happened in her life molded her into who she is today. I stopped at the page titled, "The Summer of 10th Grade." As I read it, I learned the truth about how I was conceived. Written in capital letters were the words "I WAS RAPED." It felt like the world had stopped. I had no clue.
I'd always assumed Mom got pregnant at 16 because she made stupid decisions, but I was wrong. I could never imagine how my mom could get through a day without looking at me as a reminder of what happened to her.
Where do I go from here? Should I confront her about it? I have no one to talk to, so I hope you can give me some advice. -- CHILD OF RAPE
DEAR CHILD: I'm glad you wrote, because it gives me an opportunity to point out that if you hadn't been wanted, your mother had other alternatives. If you had no clue, it's because you are the daughter she loves, and I'm sure you have been a source of much joy in her life.
If you feel the need to discuss this with her, then you should. Because she left the notebook in a place where it could be discovered, she may have subconsciously wanted it to be found.