DEAR ABBY: My wife and I will be legally divorced within a few weeks. We have a 1-year-old son. Although we have been separated for eight months, she is an awesome mother to our son. A man could not ask for a better lady to care for his child. We don't talk about much other than our son. We are no longer in love, but I can honestly say I love her for who she is -- the mother of my child.

Mother's Day is here and I would like her to know how much I appreciate all she has done, is doing and will do for our boy. Would it be appropriate to send a quick message expressing this to her? Or should I leave it alone? -- HOUSTON DADDY

DEAR DADDY: I'm a firm believer that if you think something nice, you should share it. You should absolutely express your thoughts. While the two of you may no longer be in love, I'm sure she would be gratified to know that she has your respect and appreciation. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: For several years after my wife and I married, we could not have a child. Then God smiled on us. We adopted a precious boy and later a girl, and our lives changed forever.

Every year on Mother's Day, my thoughts turn to my wife, my mother and my wife's mother. But there is also always that special feeling for the birth mothers of my children. Were it not for their unselfish love, I would not be writing this letter.

So, birth mothers, if you wonder what became of the children you presented for adoption, they have grown up, they have been loved and they are happy. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your gift of love to us. You will never be forgotten. -- PROUD ADOPTIVE FATHER

DEAR FATHER: Surrounded by so much love and gratitude, I'm sure your children have developed into successful adults.

DEAR ABBY: Last year was my first Mother's Day without my mom. Because I was feeling down, I bought a bouquet of flowers, carried it to a nursing home, handed it to a nurse and asked her to give it to a mom who wouldn't get anything for Mother's Day. It was bittersweet, but it boosted my spirits on what was a sad day. Just wanted to share. -- GWEN'S SON IN OHIO

DEAR SON: Thank you for sharing. I miss my mom, too. Gwen must have been a lovely, caring person to have raised such a thoughtful son.

DEAR ABBY: For Mother's Day, I want to say how much I love and appreciate my mom. I can never thank her enough for adopting me when I was a sick and abandoned infant. She has been to hell and back with me, but has never condemned my actions. She would just pick me up and point me in the right direction.

It has been 57 years since God sent this angel to save me (with my dad as backup), and she still guides me every day. Her kind smile and words literally saved my life. -- LOVED IN OMAHA

DEAR READERS: Today I'm wishing a happy Mother's Day to moms everywhere -- birth mothers, adoptive and foster mothers, stepmothers and grandmothers who are raising grandchildren. For what you do, I salute you. LOVE, ABBY

DEAR ABBY: I have been dating "Brandon" for three years. I'm 19, going to a four-year college and I'm planning to move in with him. I enjoy his company and can see myself with him in the future, but I wish I hadn't met him so young. I wish I could have experienced more -- other people and situations. I'm afraid I'm falling into a trap where it is more convenient to stay with Brandon.

I don't want to feel confined, but I also don't want to break up with him and find it was the worst decision of my life. We have discussed it. He said he will understand if I want to leave, but I'm afraid it might destroy him.

I enjoy being around Brandon, but I don't want to stay if it means missing half my life. He isn't the most attractive guy compared to others, so maybe that's where all this is coming from. More attractive guys talk to me, and I assume they would treat me as well as Brandon does. Maybe that's what has got me thinking. Some advice, please? -- NOT SURE IN NORTH CAROLINA

DEAR NOT SURE: Feeling as ambivalent as you do, do not move in with Brandon. To do so would be cheating both of you. Because someone seems more physically attractive than your boyfriend does not guarantee the person would treat you as well -- or better -- than Brandon does. However, this is a lesson you may need to experience firsthand.

It could also be a growth experience for Brandon to date others. He has already told you he will understand if you leave, so he may be emotionally stronger than you give him credit for. This does not mean you won't eventually wind up together, but it may make you both more appreciative of the special relationship you share because you will have something to compare it to.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 13-year-old girl who would like to fix my relationship with my mom. I love her dearly, but sometimes it is difficult to spend time with her. We have different tastes in music, clothes and what is fun. I know she notices the distance between us and would like to spend more time together, but the things she suggests we do don't appeal to me.

Dad and I are close, which is probably because he's more like a kid. We have similar likes, and he isn't as overprotective as Mom is. We're more like friends than father and daughter.

I really want to be closer to Mom, but I don't know how to do it so we'll both be satisfied. Is this a normal teen thing? -- MAKING AN EFFORT

DEAR MAKING AN EFFORT: Yes, I think so. However, I'm pleased that you want to build a closer relationship with your mother because, at your age, it's important. Being a mother these days isn't easy, especially if being the disciplinarian and drawing the line is a role that was "assigned" to her by an overly permissive father who prefers to be more of a pal than a parent.

You and your mother need to compromise regarding the things you do when you're spending time together. Part of the time, try the things she wants to do. If you do, you might surprise yourself and discover you enjoy them -- and vice versa. Talk to her about your desire to be closer to her and give it a chance. I'm sure the result will be rewarding for both of you.

DEAR ABBY: I represented my daughter "Stacy" and her husband as their real estate agent. When any of my children purchase a home, I waive my commission. My daughter knew I had been trying to finance a trip to South America for my husband so he could complete his "bucket list." She gave me a cruise on one of the most expensive cruise lines and airfare to South America as a gift for helping with their home purchase.

After my husband reviewed the itinerary, he said it wasn't the trip he had in mind and wanted to know if my daughter could change it. I was embarrassed to ask her after receiving such a gracious gift. He became indignant and said if she really wanted to give him something he wanted, she wouldn't mind changing the trip.

I told Stacy I couldn't accept her gift because it was too much money. My husband is now angry with me because he feels I am the person at fault for the loss of the trip. Is my husband right that we should request a gift exchange from the giver, or was I justified for not accepting it in light of the fact that it was too much money? -- JUST WANTS PEACE

DEAR JUST WANTS PEACE: Your husband sounds like a handful. He was at fault. Your mistake was allowing him to put you in the middle.

I'm sorry you fibbed to your daughter about why you refused her generosity, because the expense had nothing to do with it. Your husband's ingratitude had everything to do with it. Because the cruise didn't suit him, he should have spoken to her and asked if the itinerary could be adjusted. That way nothing could have been lost in translation, and he might have gotten his wish.

DEAR ABBY: During WWII, while I was overseas in the Navy, I received a "Dear John" letter. It was devastating, especially because I was so far away and unable to immediately respond. Do you think it is appropriate for a person to send such a letter while the person is far away, especially while in the service, or should the person wait until the service member returns home and say it's over face-to-face?

After all these years, I have heard many pros and cons about this question. I can think of no one else with such a wealth of knowledge in this area to ask but you. After hearing from you, I will finally put this to rest. -- JOHN IN VINELAND, N.J.

DEAR JOHN: A decade ago I would have said -- and DID tell someone -- to wait until the person came home. My thinking was the news might demoralize the recipient and distract the person enough to get her/him killed.

I changed my mind after hearing from service members stationed in the Middle East who told me I was wrong -- that it's better to get the word while there were buddies close by who could be emotionally supportive. They suggested that if the service member hears the news when he gets back -- alone and possibly traumatized by what he or she has been through -- that it could make the person more vulnerable to suicide.