DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend and I both have professional careers and are independent. We have been in a committed relationship for eight years now.

When we first met, I wasn't looking to be in a relationship. He pulled all the stops to get me to date him. He was attentive, complimentary, dinner dates, movies, etc. He was the first to say "I love you." Prince Charming had nothing on him.

When he knew I had finally fallen for him, the chase was over and everything came to a screeching halt. No more dates, no more I-love-yous. Everything he did to get me to fall in love with him stopped. The man I fell for doesn't exist anymore.

If I ask him if he loves me, he tells me I shouldn't be insecure and needy. I told him hearing the words mean a lot to me, but the words seem to have been deleted from his vocabulary. Any suggestions on how I can get him to understand how I need to hear it from him? -- LONGING FOR 'I LOVE YOU'

DEAR LONGING: You have already told your boyfriend what you need. Now it's time to find out why he is unwilling to give it to you. Then ask yourself if you want to continue like this indefinitely, because he appears to have changed considerably. Is he the kind of husband you would want for a lifetime? If not, you might be better off with someone more responsive, because this appears to be the status quo, and the man has shown himself to be unlikely to change.

DEAR ABBY: With technology the way it is today and everyone taking photos and videos of everyone around them, are there any new rules of etiquette? I'm asking because of a couple situations I've been in lately.

The other day I was kayaking with some people I met online. While I was rowing, struggling to catch up with those who were faster, breathing hard and sweating, a kayaker in front of me whom I had just met started videotaping me. I didn't want to be videotaped, but I didn't want to break my stride and explain.

Yesterday I was in a hot spring at a health spa, wearing a swimsuit. I looked up and a woman I didn't know was about to take a photo of two other women. I was in the background. Fortunately, I was able to leap out of the way, and the only part of me that might have been photographed was my backside.

In both situations I was uncomfortable, but I did nothing to stop it. What is a polite way to ask someone to stop? -- PHOTO-SHY IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR PHOTO-SHY: It's perfectly acceptable to say, "Please don't do that," or "Let me get out of range." If the photographer has any manners, he/she will accommodate you.

DEAR ABBY: My husband never gets me anything for Mother's Day. We have two children. He says, "You're not my mother!" What do you think? -- HURT IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR HURT: Is your husband the father of your children? If the answer is yes, I think the man you married is thoughtless, insensitive or cheap.

DEAR ABBY: I'm comfortable with my faith and pray before a meal at home and at friends' houses. We have become friendly with individuals from our church, and on many occasions have gone out to eat together at restaurants. When the meal is brought out, it has become a custom to pray. I feel uncomfortable praying aloud in public, and have seen others at our table already eating when someone says, "Let's pray."

My wife tells me to just go with it. But sometimes when the praying goes on for a lengthy time, I start to get sweaty and on the verge of a panic attack. I wish they would take into consideration that others may feel praying is a private matter. I don't believe that because one person doesn't want to do something, others shouldn't do it.

So what say you? When food is brought to the table, should I dash to the restroom, or would that be rude? -- PREFERS PRAYING PRIVATELY

DEAR P.P.P.: No rule of etiquette decrees that you must pray out loud if someone else chooses to. Obviously, others in the group feel as you do, or they wouldn't start eating. Because the situation makes you uncomfortable to the point of a panic attack, I think your solution to excuse yourself from the table for a few minutes is a good one -- provided you say over your shoulder that you could be gone "awhile" and no one should wait for you.

DEAR ABBY: It will be three years since my mother passed. Her house was sold and the money split among me and my two sisters. I opened a separate bank account for my inheritance money.

My partner of 16 years thinks I was wrong to do that and still throws it in my face. I spent the money on my children, grandchildren, taxes, bills, big flat-screen and stuff for him. (I also bought myself a pair of jeans.)

I felt the money was my gift from my mom. I told my partner that when his parents pass, whatever they leave him will be his. It doesn't matter how close I am to them. Your opinion, please, and no, he wasn't close to my mom. -- A GIFT FROM MY MOTHER

DEAR GIFT: In my opinion, your partner appears to be greedy and have an outsized sense of entitlement. If your mother had wanted your partner to get his hands on any of her estate, she would have put her wishes in writing.

DEAR ABBY: I recently attended the funeral of my ex-husband's uncle. I wore a conservative suit in dark navy blue with a white blouse. Several family members criticized me for not wearing black. I assumed that because I'm no longer a family member, that I wasn't required to dress as one. Should I have worn black? -- DIVORCEE IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR DIVORCEE: No. You showed respect for the deceased by attending. Sometimes funerals (and weddings) bring out the worst rather than the best in people. I'm surprised your ex-husband's family took time out from their grief to notice what you were wearing. It appears no good deed goes unpunished.

DEAR ABBY: I'm 16 and just got my first job working in food services. I have been working here for about two months, and have grown close with my co-worker "Samantha" and my boss. Samantha quit suddenly a few days ago. Today she told me our boss had told her he had strong feelings for her. He's married with kids.

I am now very uncomfortable being there, but I still want to continue working for the experience and to save money for college. I'm not sure what to do. I haven't even told my parents yet. -- SERVER GIRL IN CHICAGO

DEAR SERVER GIRL: Now that you know your employer is capable of inappropriate behavior, keep your distance. If he does make a move on you, "remind" him that you are a minor, and if he doesn't stop it, you will tell your parents and he could get into serious trouble. That should cool his ardor.

DEAR ABBY: I am in a happy relationship with my girlfriend, "Tracy." Recently, she has been talking on and on about how she is so in love with a particular celebrity. I find it irritating when she says things like, "That's my man," or "I had an intense dream about him." How am I supposed to react?

I feel I should have something clever to say in response. Ordinarily I'm not a jealous person, but lately I have begun feeling that way. Am I being ridiculous? Please help. -- REGULAR GUY IN INDIANA

DEAR REGULAR GUY: Ask your girlfriend how she would feel if you kept telling her you're "in love" with Jennifer Lopez or Beyonce and have "intense" dreams about them. Then skip the clever comeback and tell her honestly that what she's doing is annoying and you want her to cut it out. That's honest and direct, and unless your girlfriend has shredded wheat for brains, she'll comply.

DEAR ABBY: I had a closet full of clothes I found hard to part with, although they no longer fit me. Usually, I give my gently used clothes to my local donation center, but for the past year I have held onto some expensive designer items that I'm hoping to fit into again.

My sister-in-law helped me move recently and asked me if she could have some of the items. We are close, and I was happy to give them to her because I could see how much she liked them.

I have just learned that she took the items to a consignment store and sold them. If I had known she was going to sell my clothes, I wouldn't have given them to her. I feel deceived, and the money she received should belong to me. Should I address this issue with her or keep pretending that I know nothing about it? -- SWINDLED IN THE SOUTH

DEAR SWINDLED: I'm not sure "swindled" is the word I would choose, but I agree you were taken advantage of because you were led to believe your SIL wanted the clothing for herself. Because "once a gift is given it belongs to the recipient to do with as she (or he) pleases," I don't think you should confront her now. Bide your time, and when she asks you for more things in the future -- and she will -- that would be the appropriate time to refuse and tell her the reason why.