DEAR ABBY: I never thought I would be a cat-hater. My 70-year-old parents are very active, but ever since they brought home two cats, they are no longer willing to travel out of town. That means they are now missing many family events -- Thanksgiving, graduations, funerals, etc. Christmas and Easter are spared because we all travel to see them on those occasions.

I am becoming resentful that their cats are more important to them than spending time with their siblings, children or grandchildren. And, no -- they will not put them in a cat hotel or have someone come into their home to watch them. Suggestions? -- RESENTFUL IN SANTA BARBARA, CALIF.

DEAR RESENTFUL: The problem with resentment is that it can fester to the point that it destroys relationships. Has it occurred to you that there may be other reasons your parents no longer want to make these trips? The stress and expense, for instance? Or concern about spending a lot of time driving on freeways? It's also possible that two family visits a year are all they can handle.

One way to lessen your frustration would be to resolve to accept your parents just the way they are -- and also accept that it's unlikely they are going to change.

DEAR ABBY: I recently got into an argument with my mom regarding her speakerphone. I've also argued with other family members and friends over this. I believe it is rude to not let someone know that they are on speakerphone, particularly when others are present.

I feel it violates trust and the sense of intimacy that comes with speaking to the person you intended to call in the first place. Mom says it depends on the topic and that a "Heads up! You're on speakerphone" isn't necessary. Who's right? -- SPEECHLESS IN THE WEST

DEAR SPEECHLESS: You are. When someone makes a phone call, the caller usually expects that the conversation will be private. However, since you now know your mother doesn't agree, either stop confiding anything that you wouldn't reveal in a roomful of relatives, or ask at the beginning of the conversation whether the speaker is on so you'll be forewarned.

DEAR ABBY: I'm 67 and I like sex. My wife doesn't. She has no drive. It may be health-related, maybe due to meds. She has no time; she's a workaholic.

I met a widow who is very tempting. She suggested a "no strings" hookup. I'm starting to think it's not adultery if my wife is sexless. Your thoughts, Abby? -- PENNSYLVANIA SENIOR

DEAR SENIOR: I'm glad you asked. Take a pass on the widow's generous offer. Her "no strings" hookup sounds like a snare that could hang you if the Mrs. gets wind of it.

Your wife's lack of sex drive may be due to any of the things you mentioned. It could also be that your technique needs improving. Ask her if that might be the problem. If it is, a sex therapist could help you fix that in a jiffy. And it would be cheaper in the long run than what you're contemplating.

DEAR ABBY: I am recently divorced and now seeing a wonderful woman who is pretty much everything I was looking for except for a couple of issues, which concern going out to eat -- which we do often. Not once has she offered to pay for a meal.

I make good money, but she is not financially strapped by any means. While I can live with her not paying, what annoys me is she rarely says thank you after a dinner date. Once, she ordered a to-go selection to take home to her daughter. I paid for it, but again got no thanks. When we arrived at her house, she gave the food to her daughter without mentioning that I had bought it for her.

Other than her manners, she's a great gal and I'm happy we're together. Am I being petty and overly sensitive? My ex-wife never appreciated me, so I guess it's a sore spot. How should I approach this without jeopardizing everything else? -- HESITANT TO SPEAK UP IN THE MIDWEST

DEAR HESITANT: Your great gal has poor manners. Approach it by telling her exactly what you have written to me. Then ask her why she never says thank you and didn't bother to give you credit when you did something nice for her daughter.

Either this woman never learned basic manners, or she takes you for granted. And if this is a pattern with all the women in your life, it's important you understand why and do something about it before you marry again or you will never be happy.

DEAR ABBY: I stepped into a public restroom with three regular stalls and a handicap/wheelchair-accessible stall. All the stalls were occupied, so I got in line. By the time it was my turn, the handicapped stall was available. Behind me was a mother with a fussy baby and a toddler, and she needed to use the baby changing station, which happened to be located inside the handicapped stall. I let her go first.

What I didn't realize was a woman in a wheelchair was also in line behind me. She got upset when I let someone else use the stall instead of allowing her. Someone else in line piped up and told her she had to wait in line like everyone else.

When situations like this arise, should disabled people be allowed to skip the line and go straight to the big stall? Even if the mother with the baby and the location of a diaper changing station were not a factor, is the right thing to do to let a wheelchair-bound person use the restroom first, even if he/she is at the end of the line? -- TRYING TO BE POLITE

DEAR TRYING: Yes, it is. It's called a "handicapped stall" for a reason. The person with the disability should have been allowed to use it first -- even if he/she was at the end of the line.

DEAR ABBY: I have two children from a previous marriage. We have a distant relationship. For valid reasons, they have been written out of my will. Should I tell them now, or let them find out after my death? -- WONDERING WHAT TO DO

DEAR WONDERING: I see no reason to announce it now, because before you die you might change your mind.

DEAR READERS: Welcome to 2015! If the last year was challenging for some of us, a new one has arrived, bringing with it our chance for a new beginning.

Today is the day we have an opportunity to discard destructive old habits for healthy new ones, and with that in mind, I will share Dear Abby's often-requested list of New Year's Resolutions, which were adapted by my late mother, Pauline Phillips, from the original credo of Al-Anon:

JUST FOR TODAY: I will live through this day only. I will not brood about yesterday or obsess about tomorrow. I will not set far-reaching goals or try to overcome all of my problems at once.

I know that I can do something for 24 hours that would overwhelm me if I had to keep it up for a lifetime.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will be happy. I will not dwell on thoughts that depress me. If my mind fills with clouds, I will chase them away and fill it with sunshine.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will accept what is. I will face reality. I will correct those things that I can correct and accept those I cannot.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will improve my mind. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration. I will not be a mental loafer.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will make a conscious effort to be agreeable. I will be kind and courteous to those who cross my path, and I'll not speak ill of others. I will improve my appearance, speak softly, and not interrupt when someone else is talking.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will refrain from improving anybody but myself.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will do something positive to improve my health. If I'm a smoker, I'll quit. If I am overweight, I will eat healthfully -- if only just for today. And not only that, I will get off the couch and take a brisk walk, even if it's only around the block.

JUST FOR TODAY: I will gather the courage to do what is right and take responsibility for my own actions.

And now, Dear Readers, I would like to share an item that was sent to me by L.J. Bhatia, a reader from New Delhi, India:

DEAR ABBY: This year, no resolutions, only some guidelines. The Holy Vedas say, "Man has subjected himself to thousands of self-inflicted bondages. Wisdom comes to a man who lives according to the true eternal laws of nature."

The prayer of St. Francis (of which there are several versions) contains a powerful message:

"Lord, make me an instrument of your peace;

"Where there is hatred, let me sow love;

"Where there is injury, pardon;

"Where there is doubt, faith;

"Where there is despair, hope;

"Where there is darkness, light;

"And where there is sadness, joy.

"O Divine Master,

"Grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;

"To be understood, as to understand;

"To be loved, as to love;

"For it is in giving that we receive,

"It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

"And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life."

And so, Dear Readers, may this new year bring with it good health, peace and joy to all of you. -- LOVE, ABBY