DEAR ABBY: I am a woman in my 30s. Every morning I walk my dog in the park near my house. Each morning I see the same maintenance man in the park and he stares at me in a way that makes me uncomfortable. I have tried saying "Good morning," but he doesn't reply and just continues to stare.

I don't think I should have to stop frequenting the park because this creepy man works there. Is there a way I can confront him about his staring without making the situation more uncomfortable? -- DOG WALKER IN SAN FRANCISCO

DEAR DOG WALKER: Has it occurred to you that the man may be mute, or perhaps doesn't speak English? Talk to some of the other women who frequent the park and ask if this happens with them, too. There may be an explanation for his behavior, and he may be perfectly harmless.

If you are still uneasy after that, contact the parks department. But I'd hate to see someone lose his job who might be concerned only about whether you're picking up after your dog.

DEAR ABBY: When my son visits me, he stays in a hotel with his family instead of in our home. When he visits his parents-in-law, he stays in their home. His in-laws would consider it disrespectful if he didn't.

He used to stay here before he got married. His siblings and I feel hurt and disrespected, and we also think it is inappropriate. When his siblings visit, they stay at our home.

My wife died 19 months ago. I know if she were here, he wouldn't even think of staying anywhere else. How should I (and my other children) handle this? -- PROUD DAD IN NEVADA

DEAR PROUD DAD: The important thing is that they are visiting and sharing good times with you, not where they stay. I'm sure they have their reasons for wanting to sleep at the hotel. At the end of the evening, they may crave some private conversation. Or, your daughter-in-law may feel uncomfortable now that your wife is gone. The way I would handle it is to simply ask them why, without being confrontational.

DEAR ABBY: When I attended the recent funeral of a family member, I saw someone walk up to the open casket and begin taking photos of the deceased. Then, if that wasn't enough, the person asked the deceased's caregivers to pose by the body!

I feel it was in extremely poor taste. Am I wrong? I know I'll see the "photographer" again at future funerals. -- BAFFLED IN SOUTH CAROLINA

DEAR BAFFLED: In some cultures it is not offensive to take photos of people in their coffins; it is accepted, and relatives cherish these last mementos of their loved one. If you follow that logic, then it's understandable that having a photo of the deceased with the people who cared for him or her at the end would not only not be in poor taste, but would be desirable. I don't advise challenging the photographer unless you're sure everyone else feels as you do.

DEAR ABBY: I am an 18-year-old high school senior who is scared about what's going to happen after graduation. For the past three years I have known exactly where I'll be and what I will be doing in the general sense. Now that I have one more year to go, I'm worried that I won't know what to do or how to do it when I graduate. I have talked to counselors and my dad, but they all say the same thing. Do you have any advice? -- UNEASY IN IDAHO

DEAR UNEASY: Sit down someplace quiet and make a list of what your interests and talents are. If necessary, next year visit the career counseling department of your nearest community college or university and take some aptitude tests. This will give you an idea of what direction you may want to take in deciding what you should do next.

Unlike in generations past, people today sometimes change careers several times in their working lives, so don't be afraid that you'll be stuck in some unpleasant rut forever. The more you learn and the more people you meet, the greater your options will be, so stop worrying.

DEAR ABBY: In 1972 when I was 12, my father found out that I was gay, although that wasn't the word he used. After a severe beating that landed me in the hospital, I realized that to survive I was going to have to live "straight." Eventually I married, and for almost 25 years I was relatively happy. My wife died of cancer five years ago, and now I need to move on.

Can someone my age enter gay society? One thing I have noticed is that it can be more difficult for older gay men than straight. Any suggestions or should I just continue living the lie? -- AT A CROSSROADS IN MINNESOTA

DEAR AT A CROSSROADS: The gay community may be biased toward youth, but that doesn't mean it is impossible to be a part of it. You have "served your time" hiding in the straight world. Contact the nearest gay and lesbian center (lgbtcenters.org) and talk to someone there about your chances of successfully integrating. I'm sure you will be pleasantly surprised because most centers have programs for LGBT people of all ages.

DEAR ABBY: I'm a 30-year-old woman. I take care of myself, exercise regularly and have a healthy diet. I'm naturally very thin, and the diet and exercise actually help me to gain and keep weight on my otherwise "skinny" frame.

My issue is people who seem to think my weight is an OK topic of discussion, light ridicule or even harsh accusation (anorexia, bulimia, etc.). I am self-conscious about my "chicken legs" and having a "bony butt." How can I tell people that commenting on my weight is rude without creating an issue or causing drama? -- WEIGHTY ISSUE IN D.C.

DEAR WEIGHTY ISSUE: Of course it's rude, and the comments you're receiving may have in them an element of jealousy. A nonconfrontational way to handle it would be to pleasantly assure these concerned individuals that your doctor has assured you that you are fine. Then change the subject.

DEAR ABBY: When my friend "Fran" and I get together with our kids, they often play games on her cellphone until the battery dies. If she tries to take the phone from her 6-year-old to make a call or recharge the phone, he starts yelling at her, pushes her, pulls her skirt and hits her. Her reaction is to hug him and start praying for the devil to get out of his body in Jesus' name as he continues to hit her.

While I respect Fran's religion, I'm appalled at his violent behavior, concerned that he will grow up thinking it's OK to hit people, and I think this should be handled differently. What do you think? Should I say something? And if so, what can I say so as not to hurt her feelings? -- APPALLED BY THE VIOLENCE

DEAR APPALLED: Surely by now Fran knows what will happen when she lets her son play with her cellphone. The boy may act this way because his mother never taught him how to deal with frustration in a healthy way.

Whether his outbursts are the result of poor parenting or an emotional disability, be less concerned about hurting Fran's feelings than about whether her son could seriously hurt her in another year or two. Tell her this and urge her to discuss the boy's behavior with his pediatrician -- before his problems get worse and he becomes unmanageable.

DEAR ABBY: I recently got married. The week before our wedding, my husband was so hateful and hard to get along with that I wasn't sure what was going on with him. When I asked if he was sure he still wanted to get married, he would say yes.

On the day of our wedding he brought up his ex-wife's name twice -- each time making snide remarks. Nonetheless, he married me. He has slept downstairs every night since our wedding, not in our bed. Our marriage has yet to be consummated.

So tell me, Abby, what's his problem? I'm miserable! -- MISERABLE BRIDE IN OHIO

DEAR BRIDE: The only person who can answer that question is your husband. Clearly, he is not happy either. Tell him that you are worried about him and ask him to level with you. Offer him the option of marriage counseling, but if he refuses, then, frankly, you both may be better off if this marriage is annulled.

DEAR ABBY: I'm in my 30s and have a tattoo on my forearm that I now regret getting. I try to wear sweaters so no one will notice. In the past when people discovered I have a tattoo, they have judged me so I ended up feeling ashamed of myself.

I am debating having it removed -- or I could go to driving school to become a long-haul trucker. Both options are expensive, and I'm undecided about which to do. Can you advise me? -- TORN IN SAN ANTONE

DEAR TORN: It's a hard choice, but truck drivers make good money, so you may be on to something. Once you have the money, you could have the tattoo removed, if you still want to, so I'm voting for going to driving school.