DEAR ABBY: I have been married to my wonderful husband for 10 years. My father-in-law, "John," has always been a man of extremely few words with me. He mostly just ignores me when I'm around. I have mentioned it to my husband and mother-in-law over the years, and they say he's just "weird."

Last year, my brother-in-law married a nice woman, "Donna." It turns out that John talks just fine with her. He's not overly chatty, but he's friendly and polite. They had a 20-minute conversation on Christmas Eve, and I don't remember ever exchanging more than three sentences with the man. I'm naturally sociable and easygoing, and I don't know why John would treat me so rudely for so long.

Of course, I'm jealous. I would trade the father-in-law I have had for the one Donna has in a heartbeat. I'm so hurt and angry that I find it difficult to be in the same room with him now. I am seeing a therapist, which helps, but I'm still not sure how to get over this or how to proceed. Can you offer me some advice? -- LIKE I'M NOT HERE

DEAR LIKE: I'll try. There could be any number of reasons why your father-in-law has been unable to connect with you, and I can think of at least one that might have nothing to do with you. Has it occurred to you that this may have something to do with the way he feels about your husband? Sometimes the negative feelings a parent has toward a child can spill over onto the spouse. That might explain his warmer attitude toward your sister-in-law.

However, if that's not the case, then you will have to accept that people don't always have the same level of chemistry with everyone -- and your father-in-law isn't being intentionally hurtful. I have experienced this, and if you think about it, I'm sure you probably have, too.

I'm glad you're seeing a therapist, although I hope the reason isn't your father-in-law. If being around him is uncomfortable for you, then limit the time you spend with your in-laws. That's what I'd do.

DEAR ABBY: Over the past 35 years I have saved all the cards, letters and photographs sent to me by friends. I thought it would be fun to make them into scrapbooks and give them back to those friends one day.

Now that I finally have the time to organize them all, I'm not so sure. They are pre-Facebook. There are lots of letters about their pregnancies, birth announcements, child-rearing experiences and holiday letters.

Can you ask your readers if they would welcome something like this or should I toss them all? It's time to clean house. -- UNSURE IN THE WEST

DEAR UNSURE: I'll put the question out there, but the people who really should answer are the friends for whom you're thinking of creating those scrapbooks. Speaking for myself, I think they would be priceless gifts, but I can't answer for everyone.

DEAR ABBY: I'm 15. Yesterday, they told our class that one of my friend's parents had died suddenly. Every single person in our grade cried, except for me. I felt bad about not crying for my friend's loss, but I just didn't.

Another friend told me that last night people were texting, and it had been mentioned several times that I wasn't crying and that it looked like I didn't care, even though I do. I feel bad about not crying, but I don't want to lie and say that I did. Please help me. -- DRY-EYED IN COLORADO

DEAR DRY-EYED: If you feel that any explanation is called for, simply say that when you heard the news you were so stunned that you couldn't cry. Your reaction is very common. When bad news is conveyed, some people are just struck numb. Believe me, not everyone who can cry on command is necessarily grieving.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend, "Chico," and I have been going together for six years. We have discussed marriage, but for the past few months he has become distant and not as loving as he once was. Chico is the dependent type who often needs to be reminded by his parents or me about things he needs to do.

When I asked Chico what was going on, he said he is confused and he thinks he relies too much on his parents and me for direction.

He said he didn't want to break up, but he would like some time alone. He assured me there is no one else involved and he wants to continue talking on the phone to me once in a while.

I don't know what to do! Should I believe what he is saying about needing time, or do you think this is Chico's way of telling me it's over? -- HEARTBROKEN IN HOBOKEN

DEAR HEARTBROKEN: Frankly, I think Chico is trying to break it to you gently that it's over. Wish him well and let him go.

You probably meant well, but the problem with giving someone "directions" is, it prevents that person's own compass from guiding him where he needs to go. Look at it this way: This may be a period of growth for Chico and for you as well.

DEAR ABBY: I have been dating someone over the last two years and our relationship has had a lot of ups and downs. We are in our 50s and we have both been married before.

The problem is, he thinks he always has to be right. He'll never admit to being wrong. We love each other and spend most of our time together, but every time we have an argument, he calls our relationship off. I am always the one who calls to patch things up. Should I let this relationship go once and for all? -- TIRED OF THE DRAMA IN ATLANTA

DEAR TIRED OF THE DRAMA: Yes, I think so. Your gentleman friend has an unhealthy way of dealing with conflict. Unless your idea of a happy marriage is one in which you are always the peacemaker, I doubt it would last.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend and I have been together for two years. We recently spent a romantic night at a hotel, complete with dinner, drinks -- the whole shebang -- that he organized.

I know he was a little stressed about money because he mentioned it. He asked if I could shell out some money, which I did, and when the bill came, he asked me if I could shell out some more.

I was a little upset because I wasn't planning on spending that much. He says he is going to pay me back some of it, and now I just feel bad. I told him I didn't enjoy being put in that situation and things got awkward quickly.

Now I am the one apologizing, and I feel like I ruined our night. Am I being a brat? -- NEW YORK READER

DEAR N.Y. READER: I don't think so. If your boyfriend couldn't afford to pay for the romantic evening, he should have discussed it with you beforehand so you wouldn't be put on the spot.

DEAR ABBY: I work at an elementary school, and I help out during lunch, keeping order and making sure the kids are not too loud. Two of their moms work here. The kids are bullies and have no respect for adults whatsoever.

When I try to discipline them or give them a time out, they go to their moms and accuse me of targeting them because they are black. Then the moms come to me and complain and ask me why I'm "targeting" them.

This is causing me a lot of stress. I can't allow them to bully other kids, but at the same time I don't want trouble with the parents. How can I approach this situation without it getting more complicated? -- SCHOOLYARD MOM IN FLORIDA

DEAR SCHOOLYARD MOM: Because these women are preventing you from effectively supervising the children, which is your job, you should address this problem with the principal of the school.

DEAR ABBY: My mother-in-law watches my four kids so I can work outside the home. On the off chance that she can't, she tells me my brother-in-law will watch them. While I appreciate her gesture of trying to "cover her shift," my brother-in-law is irresponsible, suffers from severe depression and smokes pot.

I don't want to be rude, but I don't like her leaving my kids with him. Is there an OK way to tell her that, or do I need to stop being "overprotective" and suck it up? -- MOMMY OF FOUR

DEAR MOMMY: It would not be rude to tell your mother-in-law that while you appreciate her watching your children, if for any reason she cannot do it, you would prefer to make your own arrangements for who will supervise them. If she asks you why, then be frank with her about your concerns -- all of which are valid. That is not being overprotective; it is being conscientious.