DEAR ABBY: My husband, "George," and I have been married for 13 years. Last night he dropped a bombshell. He told me that while he loves me, he isn't happy. He assured me he has no inclination to divorce me, but he pretty much laid the entire reason for his unhappiness at my feet.

I don't handle people well. I love George and our son, but I am most relaxed and comfortable when I'm by myself. I don't neglect them. We do lots of stuff outside the house as a family. I have no close friends, and that's how I prefer it.

George's complaint is that I keep him from having friends. I have never tried to stop him. In fact, I have encouraged him to cultivate friendships and hang out with "the guys," join groups, etc. He says he can't do that and leave me at home. I wouldn't mind his going out, but it's nerve-racking for me to go.

Abby, in 13 years I don't think I have ever looked George or my son in the eye. It's not something I'm comfortable with. My husband knew how I was when he married me. What can I do? -- OKLAHOMA LONER

DEAR LONER: You need to find out why you are unable to look even the people closest to you in the eye. Eye contact is an important part of communication, and that you are unable to do it even with your child is of concern to me. There may be a psychological or neurological reason for it.

While it's fine for you to encourage your husband to socialize without you, it's understandable that he would feel uncomfortable doing it all the time. He isn't a bachelor. Couples usually socialize together, and the women often initiate the arranging.

If the root of your problem is a social anxiety disorder, there is help available for it. Your doctor may be able to refer you to a specialist. For the sake of your marriage and your family, please don't put it off.

DEAR ABBY: I'm thinking about marrying my longtime boyfriend, but I'm hesitant because he wants me to change my last name. I want to keep my maiden name as my mother did. Most of the women I look up to in my life kept their names.

My boyfriend says my wanting to keep my name tells him I am not committed. He says he'd be really hurt if I did it. I feel that retaining my name is the ultimate in female empowerment. The tradition of women changing their last name goes back to when we were treated as property and not educated. What do you think I should do? -- FEMALE FIRST, WIFE SECOND

DEAR FEMALE FIRST: Women retain their maiden names for a variety of reasons: Many do it because they are established in their careers when they marry and feel a name change would be confusing. Others prefer to keep their personal and professional lives separate. This shouldn't be a contest of wills, and you should not change your name to prove the depth of your commitment.

Your boyfriend appears to be very traditional in his thinking. Stop for a moment and ask yourself what that would mean for your future if you marry him. Would he be willing to compromise if you offer to hyphenate your name with his? If he isn't, and you feel giving up your name would make you feel like chattel, then perhaps you should look for a man whose beliefs are closer to your own.

DEAR ABBY: Our neighbors of 14 years watch our dog while we are away, which is quite often. They have free access to our home with the key we have given them.

Two months ago, the husband hit on me, really pushing the issue for me to have sex with him. Then he apologized like it was nothing. I was upset, scared, shocked and told my husband because I was concerned. My husband was not happy about it.

We have not been able to look at him or his wife (my friend) since then. We are all middle-aged. Should I tell her why we have been absent, or can you help me figure out what to do? -- BADLY IN NEED OF ADVICE

DEAR BADLY IN NEED: Make other plans for your dog when you travel, change the locks on your doors, and if your friend asks why you have been "absent," tell her why. She may not like to hear it, but she should know that if your friendship with her is going to continue, it will have to be without her husband being included. (She should have herself checked for STDs in case her husband has managed to get lucky with a neighbor who was willing.)

DEAR ABBY: I'm 31 and have been married to my husband for 2 1/2 years. He wants a baby in the worst way. I don't, and I have been clear about it.

Abby, my husband helps with nothing. I'm constantly cleaning, doing the laundry and cooking meals. That's OK, but I'd like some help. I have asked him many times to do things before football comes on or to take a break from Netflix and get something done. It never happens. I have been nice about it, and I have been angry.

We agreed to buy a bigger house and then have a baby, but at this rate, I already have one -- my husband! Is there any hope? -- MAMA ALREADY

DEAR MAMA ALREADY: No, I don't think so. You married a man who is lazy, or passive aggressive and angry at your refusal to have a baby, or has been so spoiled by his mother that he thinks this is a normal way to live. Counseling might help you get through to him, but I wouldn't bet on it.

DEAR ABBY: I am 10 years old and I have a major boy problem. My ex (Bob) broke up with me, and I felt funny around him and a little mad. So I kind of moved on. I went to my crush who had previously asked me out, and I said yes. Now I'm stuck and I don't know what to do. I asked my mom and didn't like the answer, so now I'm asking you. -- CONFUSED GIRL IN ARKANSAS

DEAR CONFUSED GIRL: I don't know what your mother told you, but here's my advice: At 10, you're too young to be in an exclusive relationship with anyone. Because you regret saying yes to your crush, tell him your mother disapproves and you cannot go against her wishes.

DEAR ABBY: Can you please tell me the proper way to eat a taco salad? Do you crunch up the taco bowl, eat everything out of it and then eat the taco bowl? I asked my husband, and he said to ask you. -- TRACI IN AMSTERDAM, N.Y.

DEAR TRACI: There are no rules of etiquette governing how to eat a taco salad. However, when I order one, I usually eat the contents of the bowl, then chip off pieces of the tortilla if I still have enough room to nibble. I have also seen diners order the salad and ask that it be served on a salad plate ("Hold the taco!") in order to save a few calories.

DEAR ABBY: When my husband died, he didn't have a lot of possessions. He died without a will, so what little he had is now with me. My problem is my mother-in-law keeps asking that I return things she gave him.

I wouldn't mind if she has them, but she has been giving them to his children, who hated him and were rude and disrespectful. They neither called nor came to see him during his long illness. They didn't even bother to come to his funeral.

I feel they want his things only because they think they might be of some value, not out of any respect or affection. My kids showed him more respect and love than his own did, and I'd rather they have his things.

Should I be honest and tell my mother-in-law why I won't give her any more of his possessions? I just don't know what to do. -- OKLAHOMA WIDOW

DEAR WIDOW: It's sad that your stepchildren ignored their father during his illness and chose to skip his funeral. Be sure to point that out when you tell your former mother-in-law you have other plans for the items. She may not like hearing it, but once a gift is given, it belongs to the recipient. And because her son died without a will, the recipient is you, his widow.

DEAR ABBY: I recently started a new job. One of the management individuals has taken a strong interest in me. He keeps doing favors for me that benefit me financially and I appreciate it. (I have never asked him to do this.)

I have always been courteous and took his gestures as a sign of kindness. But now he has started complimenting me and talking about things that go way beyond conversation. It's making me uncomfortable.

We have gone out on two friendly lunches before, and he is a genuine, kind, educated, wonderful man. He would be a great catch, but the problem is he is extremely overweight. I am emotionally attracted to him, but physically repelled. I can't wait years for him to lose the weight, but he is taking my kindness as a possible show of interest. Have you any advice that could help end his attraction, but continue the business advice he provides for me? -- IN A SPOT IN TAMPA

DEAR IN A SPOT: When the man compliments you about anything that isn't work-connected, tell him that when he does it, it makes you uncomfortable. And when he raises topics that aren't business-related, steer the conversation right back where it belongs. He may be a kind, genuine, educated, wonderful person, but if he persists, it could be considered harassment.

DEAR ABBY: I am part of a group of neighbors who often go out to dinner together. However, one woman often talks loudly on her cellphone at the dinner table, and it makes the rest of us feel uncomfortable and insignificant. It has gotten so bad we have stopped inviting her.

I feel sorry for her and wonder if I should explain the reason she's being excluded. What is the best way to handle this dilemma? -- FRIEND IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD

DEAR FRIEND: If done discreetly and kindly, it might benefit the woman to know why she's no longer included. Frankly, you'd be doing her a favor because her behavior was rude.