DEAR ABBY: My younger sister, "Tanya," is 22 and a single mother. Her son is 2. She's pregnant again, and this time her baby will be a girl.

My sister is very dramatic and emotional. She gets angry easily and has a short fuse. She's great with her son, except he picks up on her drama and is somewhat dramatic himself. My worry is that girls are more likely to imitate that behavior, and I'm concerned my niece will be just like her mother. Although Tanya has a good heart, her emotional issues have caused her to have horrible relationships with men, as our mother did.

When I suggested to my sister that she talk to someone about her anger, she flipped out on me. We were both sexually abused as children. I have dealt with those issues and she has not. Was I rude to suggest she see someone about her emotional problems? -- JUST TRYING TO HELP

DEAR TRYING TO HELP: Suggesting that Tanya discuss this with a professional wasn't rude; it was a loving thing to do. Your sister reacted defensively because she isn't ready to admit she needs help.

What you must do is hope that one day she will be receptive, but also accept that it may never happen. Not everyone is strong enough to face the fact that they need help or willing to reach out for it.

DEAR ABBY: How does a person quit being a quitter? At 46, I have realized that this is what I am. I have quit everything -- church, jobs, school. If I don't like a friend, I just drop the person. The same goes for books, exercise -- everything! How do you stop the lifelong habit of quitting? -- QUITTER IN CHARLESTON

DEAR CHARLESTON: I hate to see you give yourself a pejorative label. It's time to have yourself evaluated because it is possible you suffer from attention deficit disorder -- and if you do, there is help for it.

If that's not the case, then start small, give yourself a goal you can accomplish and don't stop until you have reached it. It doesn't have to be anything complicated, but see it through. Then give yourself another, more difficult assignment and finish it.

Perseverance is a skill that can be learned. Each time you succeed, you will reinforce the idea that you can do it. The more you do this, the better you will feel about yourself, and it will be reflected in your work and social relationships.

DEAR ABBY: I am a married woman with several single friends. They are always eager to do things with me, but married life is a lot different than being single. I'd love to connect these friends, who don't know each other. I realize making friends can be hard, and I'd love to help them in that way.

What would be the best way to do this? I don't have a lot of time to spend inviting everyone together and having them get to know each other. I'd like to do a quick introduction, then let them go have fun doing "single people" things. Is this possible? -- UNIFIER IN PITTSBURGH

DEAR UNIFIER: Absolutely. Call or email your friends and tell them there are people you want them to meet because you think they'd enjoy each other. Then arrange a group lunch at a convenient location and introduce them. After that, if the chemistry is right, they'll become friendly.

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend of four years, "Joey," is a kind and loving person. Recently the father of one of his close childhood friends died. We live a plane ride away, and Joey could not get time off work to attend the services.

I assumed Joey called his friend and family to extend his sympathies. During our last visit home, I found out he had not reached out to them. I'm upset that he didn't, and I know the friend was deeply hurt by it.

At this point, what can Joey do to make things right? Why wouldn't he make the call in the first place? -- SMOOTHING IT OVER IN SAN ANTONIO

DEAR SMOOTHING IT OVER: Joey may not have reached out because he didn't know what to do, which would have been to call and extend his condolences or send a card or handwritten note. He may have procrastinated because he didn't know what to say and was afraid he'd say the wrong thing.

The way to fix this would be for Joey to pick up the phone, apologize to his friend for not calling sooner, and confess that he knows he was wrong for not doing so. All he needs to say after that is that he's sorry for his friend's loss, which he knows must have been painful. Then he should be quiet and listen.

DEAR ABBY: My daughter-in-law allows her 2-year-old daughter to run around naked before bath time and at other times. They have been visiting us, and there are also other people in the house and yard. The child's mom tells her to say, "Look at these buns!" and laughs.

We feel this is inappropriate and dangerous. How can we get through to her that it's not right? -- CONCERNED GRANDMA IN EAU CLAIRE, WIS.

DEAR GRANDMA: While I don't think that allowing a child to run around nude at home is dangerous, I do agree that encouraging a child to run naked and say, "Look at these buns!" is unwise. The response it brings ("Ha, ha, ha -- isn't she cute!") teaches the little girl that this is a way to get attention. While this may be amusing at 2, it is setting a pattern that will attract the wrong kind of attention when she is 4, 5 or 6. Envision her mooning the first-grade class! Perhaps you can make your daughter-in-law understand by showing her this column. I certainly hope so.

DEAR ABBY: I am an asexual college student with a question about dating. When should I tell someone that I'm asexual? I'm not really "out" -- mostly because I don't feel the need to talk about it -- but I'm not ashamed of it, either. What do you think? -- NEW ENGLAND "ACE"

DEAR ACE: I see no reason to announce it at a first meeting because it's nobody's business. The time to tell someone you are asexual is after you have gotten to know the person well enough to be comfortable sharing information.

In case you don't realize it, you are not the only asexual person out there. Because there's so much emphasis on sex and sexual orientation in our society, it might help you to know that an organization exists which enables asexuals to connect with each other. It's the Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN), and you can find it on the Internet at asexuality.org.

DEAR ABBY: I am a divorced woman with three children ages 24, 22 and 16. I live on my own with my girls. I have been dating a man, "Reed," for three years. We are very much in love and have been working to blend our families. (He has two children.)

We have decided to move in together at the end of October. My lease will be up then, and Reed has sold his condo. We will be moving into the house he shared with the ex-wife while they were married. I'm comfortable with the move, and our kids are very excited about it.

Everything is fine except for one thing: His ex-wife has not yet found a new home to move into. With little time to go, he's now suggesting that we move in and live with his ex-wife until she finds a new place. Reed believes this will be very short-term -- a month or so.

The house is big enough for all of us, so that's not an issue. His ex-wife and I are friendly, so that's not an issue either. But I'm not comfortable with this plan.

Am I being irrational? Should I just act like a grown-up and make the move, or should I refuse? -- SECOND THOUGHTS IN MASSACHUSETTS

DEAR SECOND THOUGHTS: You are neither immature nor irrational. You are thinking ahead -- and that is what grown-ups do. What if Reed's ex can't find a place that suits her in a month or so? What if it takes six months or even a year? While you may like the woman, do you really want to share your dwelling with the "Ghost of Marriage Past"?

If I were you, I'd talk to my landlord and ask if you can work out a month-to-month extension of your lease. If that's agreeable, Reed can move in with you for the "short term." I'm sure you'd both be happier.

DEAR ABBY: My mother is in her mid-50s. She's a wonderful woman, but she makes us late for everything. My husband and children, my siblings and I often attend family functions and other events as a group. When we go to pick up Mom, she announces she has "just a few" chores she wants to do first, and they take forever.

We are not "a few" minutes late; we're significantly late, and sometimes miss events altogether. These have included weddings and funerals, and we have wasted hundreds of dollars on tickets to missed events. She'll often make a show of apologizing, but her behavior never changes.

We have stopped inviting Mom to some events, but she makes us feel guilty if we don't take her to a family event. We have tried helping her do her chores the day before and lied about starting times. Nothing works, and Mom finds more to do.

We have asked her friends about this behavior. They say she never pulls these stunts when they pick her up for things. When we talk to Mom about it, she insists she needs to get things done ahead of time. Her house isn't messy, nor is it known for being overly tidy.

She's in good mental and physical health. We're fresh out of ideas on how to deal with this. Help! -- LATE FOR A VERY IMPORTANT DATE

DEAR LATE: It's interesting that your mother doesn't behave this way with her friends. That tells me her behavior is controlling -- although it's hard to understand what perverse pleasure she gets out of it.

I would handle it this way: Tell Mama you will pick her up at a certain time and that you will wait no longer than five minutes for her. If she's not out by then, you will leave. And then do it.