DEAR ABBY: I was a single mom for most of my teenagers' lives. We have never been financially stable, and lately things have hit an all-time low.
I am prone to bouts of depression. I remarried last year, and my husband unfortunately does not understand or tolerate the depressions. He feels I should just "get over" things. He also doesn't believe in anti-depressants. It got so bad I attempted suicide last weekend.
My husband said my doing that was abusive to him. Had the pills I took not made me throw up, I would have happily waited to die.
There are six people on my medical aid, and the available funds are more than half used up. For me to see a psychiatrist will take a huge chunk out of it. I am caught between a rock and a hard place. If I do it, my family will miss out on medical care should the need arise later in the year. Is it selfish to try to hang onto what is left of my sanity? -- ON THE EDGE IN JOHANNESBURG, SOUTH AFRICA
DEAR ON THE EDGE: That your husband chooses not to recognize that depression is an illness -- one that's treatable -- is a reflection of his ignorance. That he would tell you your attempted suicide was abusive to him suggests that he is more concerned with himself than he is with you.
You have teenage children who need their mother. Trying to hang onto what's left of your sanity and get the medications you need isn't selfish -- it's sound thinking. If not for your sake, please seek help now for theirs.