DEAR ABBY: My darling mother-in-law passed away recently. She was a wonderful woman, a caring and loving role model to her children and grandchildren. In her will she left a diamond ring to her daughter, "Mimi," a diamond ring to me, and the remainder of her jewelry to her grandchildren. Her house and its contents were to be divided equally between her son and daughter.

My children received a box from Mimi filled with Mom's costume jewelry. All of her expensive jewelry was missing. When I asked about the missing items, Mimi said they were in the box, and she had taken photos to prove it. My husband noticed that many valuable items were missing from the family home as well.

Recently my daughter and I ran into my sister-in-law in a restaurant and saw she was wearing one of the pieces of jewelry that had been intended for my children. When I asked Mimi to please take it off and give it to my daughter, she replied that she couldn't because she was "still grieving." Any advice on how to handle this? -- HEARTBROKEN IN WASHINGTON

DEAR HEARTBROKEN: What a shame. Who was the executor of your mother-in-law's will? That person should have been overseeing the disposition of her property, and that is the person you should contact now to see the deceased's wishes are complied with. If Mimi was the executor, then your next step should be to contact an attorney.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 25-year-old male who is still a virgin. It bugs me knowing that uglier, disgusting, less intelligent guys are having sex, while I -- compassionate, smart, educated and good-looking -- am not. What am I supposed to do? What is the secret to finally losing my virginity?

This has been bothering me lately because I have lost a lot of weight and feel better about myself, but it still isn't happening. I used to be extremely shy, but the confidence I gained from the weight loss has helped me in talking to strangers.

I don't get it. I feel like life is playing a cruel joke on me. I feel like the only virgin in the room. Please give me some advice. -- READY FOR MORE

DEAR READY: Please take a moment and re-read the second sentence of your letter. If you do, you will realize that while you have lost the weight, you have not lost the anger you must have felt when, for years, you went unnoticed. The chances of losing your virginity -- and more important, having a relationship -- will improve if you talk to a psychologist. Unless you do, as smart, educated and good-looking as you now are, the "vibe" you emit may continue to repel women. I have seen this happen, so please give my advice serious consideration.

DEAR ABBY: Our son and daughter-in-law live out of state. They have a 1-year-old daughter. For their anniversary, we sent them a gift certificate saying that we would pay for a night out on the town, including a hotel of their choice in the city where they live. We offered to watch our granddaughter and their dogs while they enjoyed themselves.

Their response was a resounding NO! They said that it was the most selfish gift we had ever given them because it wasn't for them; it was so we could baby-sit. What do you think? -- GRANDMA GAYLE

DEAR GRANDMA GAYLE: I think their manners are atrocious. How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child!

DEAR ABBY: I'm 15 and my boyfriend, "Todd," is almost 18. He wants us to have a baby. I would like to, but I live with my grandmother because my mom has a drug problem and my dad was killed when I was 9. I'm scared if I get pregnant she won't let me keep it.

My grandmother and I don't get along sometimes, and I'm scared she'll have my boyfriend put in jail. I have thought about this, and I really want to have a baby with him. I love Todd more than anything. Is it bad that I want to get pregnant? I'm in ninth grade and he'll be a senior. Please give me some advice. -- WANTS TO BE A MOM, PRINCETON, W.VA.

DEAR WANTS TO BE A MOM: Before you and Todd rush into this, it is important to consider how you will take care of a baby. Babies are not just cute; they are also completely helpless and a lot of work.

Some schools offer students a program in which boys and girls are given dolls that require 24-hour care. They are just like real babies in that they cry, wet, and must be "fed" and with a parent at all times. Students are assigned to care for their "baby" for a week or more, and often, by the end of the assignment period, the desire to have a baby disappears as the reality about the degree of responsibility becomes obvious. Please look into the possibility of attending a class like this because it is important.

If you become pregnant as a freshman, it will lessen your chances of graduating. You and Todd will need a diploma in order to support yourselves and a child. If loving a baby was all it takes, your mother would be caring for you instead of your grandmother. I cannot stress enough the importance of you and Todd completing your education before becoming parents. It will make you better parents. You should also be prepared to stay together until your child is an adult. Isn't that what you would have wanted if your father hadn't died and your mother turned to drugs?

I'm glad you wrote, that you're smart and didn't act on impulse. Your grandmother is doing her best to raise you, and she already has enough responsibility on her shoulders. Another child might be more than she can physically and emotionally handle.

DEAR ABBY: I'm 16 and have been in a relationship for five months. I know I'm young, but things just happened. I like this boy a lot and he likes me.

Before we went out we were best friends. Back then, we had so much to talk about. But ever since we officially became a couple, there's nothing really to say to each other. We used to talk all day on the phone, and now it's kind of hard to have a normal conversation.

The physical attraction is there, but the mental attraction is sort of going away. He is amazing and listens to all my problems, but when I don't have any problems there is nothing to say. I don't want to end it between us. What should I do? -- DISAPPOINTED

DEAR DISAPPOINTED: You and your boyfriend may be spending too much time together and not enough on other activities. If you interact more with other friends, become active in sports or group activities and spend more time apart, then you -- and he -- will have more to bring to your conversations. Please try it, and encourage him to do the same.

DEAR ABBY: I truly enjoy the "pennies from heaven" letters. I get goose bumps every time I read them. So, I want to go on record and say to everyone in heaven, I'd love to hear from each and every one of you. However, to make it clear your message is intended for me, please make it 1-ounce gold coins. -- WES IN GREENFIELD, IND.

DEAR WES: I'm not sure my column appears in the hereafter, but if it does, be careful what you wish for. If gold keeps inflating, the coins could bounce right back up to heaven.

DEAR ABBY: My wife died a few years ago. I live alone and have been a bachelor since then. Old friends have been kind enough to pass along the names and phone numbers of widows or divorcees they felt would be of interest to me. I have taken several of them out to dinner. Some were interesting, but for one reason or another we didn't have enough "chemistry" for me to call them for another date.

What is the considerate thing to do after having just one date? Should I call the person and say it was pleasant, but ...? Should I not call at all and move on? I feel guilty at times for not following up with some comment, as they were mostly nice women. Any suggestions about how to handle these situations would be welcome. -- MIAMI WIDOWER

DEAR WIDOWER: Conversations such as this can be awkward, which is why many people avoid having them. Because you feel you "should" say something, a way to handle it would be to say you had a nice time, but you are still grieving and are not ready for a relationship. Chemistry is supposed to be mutual, so don't be surprised if some of the women aren't interested in pursuing a relationship with you, either. That's life.

DEAR ABBY: I work in a store that is popular with teenagers. Every Christmas, parents and grandparents come in here with absolutely no clue what to get. Asking "What's popular right now?" doesn't help. (What's cool to one teen may be lame to another.) I'd like to offer a couple of tips to help clueless relatives select the right gift for their teen.

(1) Bring a recent photo of her or him. We can tell a lot by looking. It will provide hints as to what kind of gift they may like.

(2) Copy a list of their "likes" from Facebook and bring it with you. It may mention books, music, movies or other interests that will make it easy to track down something they would enjoy.

I hope this helps some of your readers. -- VALERIE IN FORT WORTH

DEAR VALERIE: Bless you for writing. I'm sure many parents and grandparents will take your suggestions to heart. Santa isn't the only one who needs a "helper" at Christmastime.

DEAR ABBY: What do you think of a 30-year-old man who posted every detail about his breakup with my daughter on Facebook for all of their 1,000 friends and family members to read? There was some personal and very painful stuff.

Is this the "new generation" norm? Or is he immature and inconsiderate? -- HURTING FOR MY DAUGHTER

DEAR HURTING: Welcome to the wonderful world of the Internet, where millions of individuals have chosen to live their lives online for all to see. And while you and I might consider what happened to be a form of kissing-and-telling, bragging, a bid for sympathy and in poor taste, the people who love your daughter will "unfriend" this person, and those who love gossip will devour every detail with relish.

In time your daughter will realize she is lucky this relationship is over. Whether her former boyfriend used Facebook to gain 15 minutes of fame or as a weapon to hurt her, I think she can do better. Don't you?