DEAR ABBY: My father passed away a year ago, after being married to "Valerie" for 14 years. After his death, she got his life insurance. She paid for his funeral and the burial. She also bought a new house and a horse within two months of losing our father. Four months later, she was dating another man.
My sister and I didn't ask for anything except a few articles of Dad's clothing. Having spent all the insurance money, Valerie is now asking me and my sister to give her money for our father's headstone. We feel his life insurance money should have been used for this. My question is, are we wrong for being angry with her? Isn't she at least morally obligated to purchase his headstone? -- LOST GRIEVING DAUGHTER
DEAR DAUGHTER: Your stepmother should be ashamed of herself for foisting off her moral responsibility to her husband of 14 years. And no, you're not wrong to be angry about it.
You and your sister must now decide if you can live with the thought of your father having an unmarked grave. Ask the people who manage the cemetery if they might allow you to have a special planting -- a bush, perhaps -- to be used as a marker in lieu of a headstone.