DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been married 10 years. At every company he has worked at, there was always a female he got close to -- sometimes a little "too close." We have had counseling. Our counselor has told him his behavior is destructive in a marriage and he should be an "open book" for as long as it takes to rebuild the trust in our relationship.
I recently found that he has changed all the passwords on his email and computer accounts. Needless to say, I am seriously disturbed by his behavior. He hasn't said anything about it, and I think he's waiting for me to ask him why. I think he wants to make the point that his "privacy" is being compromised, but I also suspect there is another new woman he's interested in recruiting.
I'm tired of these games. I don't know whether it's worth the energy to once again pursue the reasons for his behavior, or to finally walk away because I don't think he'll ever change. I really need advice. Please help. -- RUNNING OUT OF ENERGY
DEAR RUNNING: Because you are tired of the games, stop participating in them. Obviously, what your husband has done is a red flag. Tell him you know he has changed his passwords, and it appears to be an attempt on his part to close a chapter of what's supposed to be an "open book." If he attacks you for looking, remind him that with his history of serial infidelity you would have to be out of your mind not to.
Forgive me for appearing negative, but if after 10 years the two of you haven't been able to fix what's missing in your marriage -- even with the help of a counselor -- there is nothing more I can suggest.