DEAR ABBY: "Just Clumsy in Amarillo" (March 24) could be my twin. I am also a klutz who bruises easily. Years ago, when I was a brand-new EMT, my arms were so bruised and purple from lifting stretchers that co-workers started asking if my husband was beating me. Luckily, my husband, a submariner, was on patrol at that time so it let him off the hook.

My husband used to tell me the only reason he didn't worry too much about me at work was because I wore steel-toed boots, and he suggested I buy steel-toed flip-flops and slippers. I can walk through the house and trip over nothing at all. I once broke all the toes on one foot sliding off an exam table in a doctor's office.

Tell "Clumsy" to hang in there. She's not alone. Lord knows there are a lot of us klutzes out there and she's in good company. As long as she can keep a sense of humor about her condition, she'll be fine. -- ANOTHER KLUTZ IN UTAH

DEAR ANOTHER KLUTZ: I received many responses regarding being accident-prone. While many readers shared their "graceless" moments, others pointed out that it could be caused by a medical problem. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: I have an inherited neuromuscular disorder called Charcot-Marie-Tooth disease, also known as CMT. It is also called motor sensory neuropathy or peroneal muscular atrophy.

CMT affects the peripheral nerves. A common symptom is short wide feet with very high arches, weak ankles, and tripping over our own feet. Falling UP the stairs is what we do best. At family reunions, we sit around comparing our funny feet and the bruises from our frequent falls.

"Clumsy" should see a neurologist for nerve conduction testing. The extent of her frequent "accidents" and bruising is not normal, and she needs to know what the problem is. -- ESTHER, AN R.N. IN IDAHO

DEAR ABBY: You were right to tell "Clumsy" that she shouldn't avoid her friends as that would only increase their suspicions. However, she also needs to include her fiance more in their social activities. If her friends get to know him and discover that he is a kind and compassionate person who respects boundaries and knows how to control his temper, their suspicions of abuse will be allayed. -- CARLA IN VIRGINIA

DEAR ABBY: As a child, my mother always chided me to "watch out, pay attention and look where you are going." I had bruises all over from bumping into things. At 45, I learned from an ophthalmologist that I had NO depth perception. Now I understand why I must look down when stepping off curbs or drive five car lengths behind other cars, etc. "Clumsy" needs to get a thorough eye exam and have her depth perception measured. -- MADE SENSE OF IT

DEAR ABBY: I am 31 and have been clumsy all my life. I have fallen on ice a few times this winter, even though I tried to be very cautious. Thankfully, I have sustained only some bruises and a few pulled muscles -- no broken bones.

I, too, have seen the looks, rolled eyes and heard the sighs of concerned friends. It's hard not to become defensive when your friends might have a negative perception of your husband. I just smile and make playful reference to the fact that this has been going on far longer than I've known my husband.

To "Clumsy": Drink plenty of milk to keep your bones strong, and maintain a lighthearted attitude when the subject comes up. -- NOT-SO-GRACIE IN NEW YORK

DEAR ABBY: I recently got genital herpes. I am very depressed over it and am experiencing a lot of difficulties, not to mention the expense.

The man I caught the virus from, "Jack," claims he didn't know he had herpes. I don't know what to believe, except that I should be compensated. My life has been destroyed. I hate the fact that this happened and, to top it off, Jack has changed his phone number! Is this a criminal act? Should I take action? -- OUTRAGED IN MISSOURI

DEAR OUTRAGED: Please do not allow having herpes to define who you are. Your life has not been "destroyed." You contracted a virus, as millions of other Americans have. While inconvenient, it is not the end of the world. What you need is emotional support, and it's as near as your computer. There are support groups for people who have herpes -- just Google "herpes support groups-USA" and you'll find groups galore.

As to whether to take legal action against "Jack," please remember that lawsuits can be expensive. And to determine whether he knew he had herpes at the time he was involved with you, you would have to get a hold of his medical records -- which could be complicated. Your time and money would be better spent in other ways than looking backward, and that's what I recommend.

DEAR ABBY: I am 35 years old and the mother of two children. The oldest is 4 and my little one just turned 1.

My mother-in-law had gastric bypass surgery two years ago. She lost a lot of weight and looks great, having gone from a size 16 to a size 4.

My problem is the comments she makes about my weight in the presence of others. For example, "Do you see that 'Cate' is so big-boned and I am so petite?" It hurts, and I don't know what to do about it. What can I say to her the next time she says something like that? -- "CATE" IN OKLAHOMA CITY

DEAR "CATE": Don't wait for your mother-in-law to say something about your weight in front of others. Tell her clearly, in advance, that her comparisons are hurtful and you want them stopped immediately. And if she doesn't comply, the next time she does it, smile and say, "We can all see that you're petite and I'm not, but I'll always be younger."

DEAR ABBY: Early this year, my mother went to the curb to collect the empty trash bin and put it away for the week. As she wheeled it behind her home, she slipped on the ice and broke her hip. She lives alone and was in the back of her property where nobody could see or hear her.

Fortunately, she'd had the foresight to grab her cell phone before she went outside. Because she was unable to stand up she could have frozen to death. She called 911 and within minutes an ambulance arrived to take her to the hospital.

Mom had surgery to repair the hip and is recovering, but it was a close call. This is a reminder to your readers that if they live alone -- or have parents who do -- to make sure to have a cell phone available at all times. -- RELIEVED SON IN ELKHART, IND.

DEAR RELIEVED SON: I'm pleased to pass along your important message. Your mother did, indeed, have a close call. It must have been her guardian angel who handed her her cell phone as she left the house that wintry day. Please tell her I said so and that I hope she's better soon.

DEAR ABBY: My wife was hired for an administrative position. On her first day of work, they called her into the human resources director's office and told her she was being "let go" because of her website. The site has photos of her when she worked as a model for a large department store. They are in no way provocative or overly revealing. Photos of our children are also on the site.

The HR director told her that one of the other (internal) applicants had Googled her and had seen the site. An image so upset the other applicant that she made a formal complaint, which caused my wife's dismissal!

We consulted a lawyer and contacted the local Equal Employment Opportunity Commission only to be told that North Carolina is an "at will" employment state and that the employer did nothing wrong. We feel their actions were wrong. Is there anything that can be done? -- YANKEE IN CONFEDERATE COUNTRY

DEAR YANKEE: I'm sorry, but the answer is no. In most states there is a presumption of "at will" employment unless you have a written contract to the contrary. However, the employer cannot terminate an employee for an illegal reason -- such as age, religion, gender, sexual orientation or a disability. It does not appear from your letter that your wife was terminated for an illegal reason, but what happened stinks anyway.

DEAR ABBY: My mother got drunk at a family function and started a fight with me. I ended up leaving before it could escalate, but I feel I ruined the host's day. Would it be appropriate to send an "I'm sorry" note, and how would I word it? -- MAKING AMENDS IN TENNESSEE

DEAR MAKING AMENDS: The person making the amends should be the person who created the scene -- your mother. If you feel something needs to be said by you, and apparently you do, then write your host and say, "I feel terrible about what happened at your party and would like to apologize for my mother's behavior. I left before she could create a scene, but I'm afraid it cast a shadow on your day, and for that I would like to apologize." Sign it with love.

P.S. You'll lead a happier life if you stop feeling that you have to apologize for your mother's behavior. You are responsible only for your own.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been lucky enough to travel all over the world during our long marriage. Over the years, we collected lovely items from every location.

Now that we are older, we have decided to move into a smaller home, and would like to share these lovely souvenirs with our friends. Although I think "Ellen" would love to have one of my silk scarves, and "Peter" would appreciate a pair of my husband's marble bookends, or "Annemarie" would cherish my necklace from India, etc., I'm unsure that my choices would be their choices.

Would it be proper for us to ask our friends to choose among our treasure rather than our making the choice for them? -- WORLD TRAVELER IN MIAMI BEACH

DEAR WORLD TRAVELER: I commend you for your generosity; however, you might run into trouble if several of your friends choose the same item. Were I in your shoes, I would make the selection for each of them. (Include a note with the gift -- i.e., "Ellen, this scarf matches your eyes," "Annemarie, I know you love ethnic jewelry," etc.)