DEAR ABBY: My mother recently passed away. She and Dad were married 52 happy years. Over the years, Mom received a few Christmas cards from "Linda," my brother's girlfriend 30 years ago.
Dad found Linda's address and let her know about Mom's passing. Now he says he and Linda have become good friends. Dad says they're "only friends" and Linda is someone he can talk to. We are very upset about whatever relationship they have. My brother and I and our children want to be the ones to comfort Dad and be comforted by him. It has been only two months since Mom's death.
He talks to Linda about everything. They have even discussed the details of Mom's grave marker. Linda says Dad is the father she never had. (Her father is still living.) I confronted Dad about it, and we had a huge argument. Are we wrong and insensitive for disapproving of his closeness with this woman? -- FALLING APART IN TEXAS
DEAR FALLING APART: Please accept my sympathy for the loss of your mother. You and your brother and children may want to be the ones to comfort your father (and be comforted by him), but what he may feel he needs right now is someone he can talk to who is not emotionally involved and doesn't need comforting.
You didn't do anything wrong, but please remember that you are all grieving right now, and when people are grieving, their emotions are raw. This situation will work itself out in time, but until it does, please remember that your father can talk to whomever he pleases.