DEAR ABBY: Is there anything wrong with having a lover solely for the purpose of sex? He is grieving for his late wife (my best friend), and I am separated from my husband. We're both lonely and have supported each other through our pain. A few weeks ago we decided to become lovers.
We both have our eyes open, and we don't expect anything out of this except a friendship with benefits. I am satisfying his needs, and he is making me remember the woman I used to be before I was emotionally beaten down by my husband.
I see myself as enjoying the best of both worlds: I'm finding myself again, and I don't have to answer to anyone but me. So, Abby, what do you think? I guess I'm looking for some validation for our selfishness. -- FRIEND WITH BENEFITS
DEAR FRIEND: Selfishness? You are both consenting adults. You can do what you want. Many successful relationships have begun with two people supporting each other through a painful period -- and I don't consider that "selfish" at all.
What I AM having trouble understanding is why you haven't begun divorce proceedings from your emotionally abusive husband. Once that's started, you should have no reason to have any second thoughts at all.