DEAR ABBY: I met my neighbor "Summer" about 18 months ago when we bought homes in the same development. She was nice; we became very chummy. We'd visit each other's homes for dinner, cookouts, or just to talk and hang out. Summer and her boyfriend and my husband and I had great times together.

Abby, Summer is becoming a fatal attraction! She came over one day while I was decorating my son's room and admired the bedroom furniture. Then she ran out and bought the same bed for her son. That was just the beginning: She has since copied my dining room set, my dog, my hairstyle, paint in the kids' room, wood floors and -- get this -- my living room set in the identical color. I recently bought a car. So did she, same make and model.

I no longer speak with Summer as often as I used to, and I think she's sensing something is wrong. My husband says it's hilarious, but my kids and I don't. If I mention that I want something in casual conversation, before you know it, she's breaking her neck to get it. My kids say I should mention something big and expensive that I "want" and let her run out and get it.

My co-workers tell me I should take it as a compliment, but I can't. When you buy a home, you add your own special touches, and it should reflect who you are -- not your neighbor. Please help me. I enjoyed Summer's company at one point, and now I no longer want her in my home. I haven't spoken to her about this, but how can I without blowing my top? -- FUMING IN NEW JERSEY

DEAR FUMING: You have described a person who is unimaginative and insecure about making her own choices. The poor woman needs help, not banishment. By all means talk to her -- but when you do, offer to help her to make some design and fashion statements that are her own. That way, you could enjoy each other's company and you will not be encroached upon. Before blasting her, please give it a try. It would be a kindness to someone who is obviously less creative than you.

DEAR ABBY: I have been dating a man who has demonstrated a severe anger problem in recent months. When "Zack" gets angry, he has thrown objects around in his house, knocked over furniture, and screamed and yelled things that I have confided to him for the whole neighborhood (not to mention his roommate) to hear.

When these episodes occur, I pick up my purse and head for the door. Then he blocks my way, throws his keys so I can't unlock the door and grabs my personal belongings -- especially my cell phone -- to prevent my making a phone call or leaving.

Telling him I'm scared of him and that I want to go doesn't seem to get through. He always steps in front of me, pushes me back and, basically, throws my things around so I have to pick them up and I can't get out.

I have told him before that I can't date someone who won't let me leave if I'm scared or threatened. He says he "understands," but then it happens again!

What are the legal ramifications of his preventing me from leaving? Are there certain steps I can take other than breaking a window to get out? I secretly hope he sees this so he will know I'm serious. -- SCARED IN HOUSTON

DEAR SCARED: Preventing a person from leaving in the manner you have described is called "false imprisonment," and it is a crime. However, what puzzles me is why you would allow such a thing to happen twice. Surely you are aware that Zack is a person who is unable to control his emotions, and that the longer you are involved with him the more his outbursts will escalate. He's an abuser, and the surest way to "get out" is to do it NOW by ending the relationship. You can't cure his problem. Only he can do that. My advice to you is to run, before he gets angry again.

What teens need to know about sex, drugs, AIDS, and getting along with peers and parents is in "What Every Teen Should Know." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $6 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby, Teen Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: Your reply to "Bald in Baltimore," the man who's considering getting rid of his wig, left me feeling you were advising someone with an "affliction" that isn't normally publicized. (I have false teeth, so should I also have a "coming-out party"? Pun intended.)

My 40-something-year-old son lost most of his hair by the time he was 22 -- thanks to genes from my side of the family. When he was in his 30s, he and a couple of friends shaved their heads on a dare, and he has kept it that way ever since. It's a popular and fashionable look. "Bald in Baltimore" should retire the wig and join the bandwagon with a shaved head. -- NANCY IN SPRING, TEXAS

DEAR NANCY: If my comment about the "coming-out party" offended you, it was not meant to. I was being literal. Many other readers agreed with me that the hairpiece was unnecessary. Read on for a sample:

DEAR ABBY: Your idea of a coming-out (or off) party is a great one. He must have a sense of humor about all this. Have a laugh and be done with it. I hope he knows that what makes a man appealing isn't a head of hair but his attitude, outlook, and the way he treats others. When he loses the wig he will gain his freedom. -- DENVER LADY

DEAR ABBY: Hooray to "Bald in Baltimore" who's thinking of ditching his rug. Many women find bald men attractive, and I am one of them. So what if his head is shaped a "little" funny! That's what makes him an individual, like our fingernails, noses or toes. I'd rather see a bald man any day than a "rug" or a "comb-over." That man needs to know he has nothing to lose and everything to gain. And bravo to you, Dear Abby, for suggesting a coming-out party. What an excellent idea. -- T.L.C., CANVAS, W.VA.

DEAR ABBY: I totally agree with your answer to "Bald in Baltimore." My husband has the same problem. I met him when he was bald. We have been married seven years and have three beautiful children together. I think it's time that writer ditches the wig and becomes the man he always wanted to be! -- M.S., OKEECHOBEE, FLA.

DEAR ABBY: I worked for many years with a man in the same situation. His mother also objected to him "coming out" from under the wig. Her real objection was that his baldness made HER feel "old." Perhaps that's what is behind "Bald in Baltimore's" mother's comment as well. -- PATRICIA IN BELLE, W.VA.

DEAR ABBY: I am in my late 20s. When I was still in college, I met a wonderful man in his 30s. He was completely bald. He explained to me that when his hairline began to recede, he started shaving his head rather than dealing with the anxiety of it. I saw old pictures of him with hair, and I can honestly say I like him better without it. What attracted me to him was his personality, his intelligence, and the fact that he treated me better than gold.

Please tell "Bald in Baltimore" to do what he feels comfortable with and be true to himself. In the end, he'll find it is the best decision he ever made. -- SHERI IN ALBERTVILLE, ALA.

DEAR ABBY: When I read your advice to the man in Baltimore to have a "coming-out party" to get rid of his wig, I thought, "Wouldn't it be wild to arrange to 'shave' his head if people pledged money for cancer research or some other favorite charity?" -- KATHY IN CHICAGO

DEAR KATHY: Yes! I love your idea. Way to go!

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DEAR ABBY: It's Tuesday, 3:22 a.m., and I'm wide awake, not by choice. I live downstairs from some newlyweds, "Ike" and "Tina," who moved into our apartment building a few weeks ago. This is the second time I've been awakened by their fighting. I hear loud thumps and bangs and cries from both of them. Because we leave our windows ajar at night, we can also hear what they are shouting at each other.

I am well aware that Ike has hit Tina on more than one occasion. The first time, I was tempted to run upstairs and "save" her. This time, I'm lying here wondering if I should call the police or write a personal note and leave it under the door.

I don't want to embarrass anyone or cause more problems. But I do want them to stop fighting. It breaks my heart. Ike apologizes, then Tina yells and he cries, and she says she wants to leave, and he begs her to stay. I hear the whole thing.

I know the best thing would be to suggest counseling, but that's not my place. I have never met them. I'd hate for something worse to happen, and I refuse to be like half the people here in Los Angeles and just sit and watch the violence go by. So what should I do? Please answer soon. I don't think I can handle much more of this. -- SLEEPLESS IN L.A.

DEAR SLEEPLESS: Someone would be doing this young wife a favor if he or she could catch her when her husband isn't around and tell her plainly that batterers don't break the habit without professional help, and she needs to get out of there before she is seriously injured.

If that's not possible, then the next time you hear "thumping," you should definitely summon the police. Law enforcement officers are trained to handle these kinds of situations, which are potentially life-threatening. The husband could be high on something, or a psychopath. Under no circumstances should you try to intervene because it could be physically dangerous for you.

DEAR ABBY: I have a problem I don't know how to solve. When we have family over for get-togethers, my "Aunt Irene," whom we all love, disappears and goes into our bedrooms -- we have three -- going from one to the other looking through our drawers. Nothing has ever gone missing, so we can't imagine what she's looking for. The last time she stayed 45 minutes.

When I asked Aunt Irene's husband where she was, he got embarrassed. He tries to ignore it. I followed her once and asked what she was doing. She said, "Just looking."

My husband says I should close all the bedroom doors, but my oldest daughter had her door closed and Aunt Irene went in anyway.

Aunt Irene always wants to be included and she's good company, but she has this odd habit. How should we handle this? -- WONDERING IN CLEVELAND

DEAR WONDERING: It appears your Aunt Irene is nosy and can't resist the impulse to take "inventory" of your possessions. Few people would be as easygoing as you have been. You do not have to tolerate her snooping. Because closing your bedrooms hasn't kept her out, consider locking them.

If that's not feasible, then the next time you have a family get-together, "forget" to invite her. Should she ask why, be truthful. Let her know now much you enjoy her good company, but you cannot put up with her inspection tours. If that doesn't do the trick, the next time you catch "Miss Nosy" in a bedroom, ask her to please rejoin the others -- and feel free not to invite her again.

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