DEAR ABBY: An ex-girlfriend from three years ago has asked me to help her work on a project that will further her career.
I am already established, and have been known to help people on occasion. I want her to succeed, but the problem with this particular charity case is the reason we broke up. It happened just days before I planned to propose to her, when I found out that she had been unfaithful to me.
Originally, I didn't want to help her and told her I thought the situation would make me uncomfortable because I would have to spend a lot of time with her. However, when I related this to a friend, he told me to get over it and help her. (My other friends thought I was a sucker for even considering it.)
I am over the heartbreak I once felt with her, although it took a while. I'm dating now, but have yet to meet someone I click with.
How should I handle this? My initial response was "No -- I think I'd feel too uncomfortable." But I keep second-guessing myself. -- WOBBLY BOUNDARIES IN TEXAS
DEAR WOBBLY: I think the woman had a lot of nerve asking you to help her, considering the terms of your breakup.
Please stop second-guessing yourself; listen to your gut and "pass." Because if you don't, MY gut tells me you are going to get emotionally involved and get hurt again.