DEAR ABBY: I am 24 years old and two months away from moving in with the man I love. We're moving into a house he purchased but cannot afford without me. I love him and cannot imagine my life without him. We fit each other perfectly in every respect except one: I want children and he doesn't.
Whenever I bring up the subject, he becomes agitated and argues that he hasn't made up his mind about it, but is "leaning toward no."
I'm left wondering if I should take this huge step when I know if he doesn't want kids, I will have to leave. Should I force him into telling me once and for all what the deal is, or wait to see if maturity changes his mind (as my peers have urged me to do)? Won't it be harder to leave after I move in? -- SECOND THOUGHTS IN NEW YORK
DEAR SECOND THOUGHTS: It not only will be harder to leave once you move in, it will also be harder to leave after you have invested more time in the relationship. What if maturity doesn't change his mind? You may love him, but you would be making a huge mistake to move in with him while this question remains unresolved. I recommend premarital counseling before you make up your mind about this man.