DEAR ABBY: My late husband, "Luke," was born in Arkansas in 1944, a time when unwed mothers, abortion and child adoptions were spoken of only in private, if at all.
Luke died from leukemia 20 years ago. During his treatment, blood samples were taken from his mother and father as possible candidates for a bone marrow transplant. The testing revealed that his parents were not, in fact, his biological ones. In an effort to spare their feelings, Luke asked that neither I nor his siblings say anything to them.
My sons are men now. One of them suffers from paranoid schizophrenia. We would like to know, for both medical and personal reasons, who their biological grandparents are. At the same time, we're concerned about disregarding their father's wishes. Please help us decide what to do. -- STUCK IN NEVADA CITY
DEAR STUCK: I believe that everyone should have full and complete knowledge of his or her medical history. When a child is adopted, that information should be made available to the adoptive parents.
However, because your husband's parents may be unwilling or unable to cooperate, it may ease your mind to know that I took your question to a respected psychoanalyst who informs me that there is no clear-cut evidence that schizophrenia is genetic.